ON TODAY'S AGENDA

I take a look at Sony's E3 press conference, which tied with Microsoft's in my mind, and pretty much everybody else's (excluding moms, who are just super excited about sky diving).

GAWD Sony had the best speaker by leaps and bounds, a sense of humor is so necessary for these things that I'm surprised they haven't started hiring comedians already. Luckily, Jack Tretton actually knows what a punch line is, and makes light of the ridiculous number of leaks that squirted out hours before E3.

I know it happened in the middle, but I wanna talk about it now before I explode. OMG SONY MOTION CONTROLLER PWNS! Absolutely astounding, if you haven't seen it, you have to do so now. The prototype looks like part of a staff from LOTR but it doesn't matter b/c it is the most epic sauce on epic spaghetti thing ever. I don't know why they don't just release the thing now, I'd certainly buy a PS3 in a heartbeat, and it would make the Wii console itself ACTUALLY blush. The 1:1 ratio just blew me away, using it as a bow, a gun, racket, pencil, everything was completely impressive. If Sony times the release of that hardware properly in sync with the FFXIII release (b/c we all know that once SQUE releases a game for the new Sony system it is the driving force behind sales) they will see massive sales figures and might actually be able say what they've wanted to say for a few years - "I told ya so".

God of War 3 excited everybody, I'm just not a big fan of empty violence games like GOW or Dead Rising, so I wasn't too thrilled really, even though it does look satisfyingly violent and graphically gorgeous. I did notice that the standard fast attack combo is almost the exact same, AGAIN so I really hope they fix that because the combos get repetitive enough in one game, no need to carry that monotony over into your shiny new baby.

Final Fantasy 13 in english, which sounded very nice, and we got to see Odin for the first time. I'm trying to distance myself from press about the game because the more I care about a game, the less I want to read up on it, I do the same thing for Bioshock 2, so ya. Also Final Fantasy 14 was announced which was so shocking I had to rewind the video to make sure I heard properly. It's going to be an MMO, but will run alongside the very popular XI. Many of you might not know, but FFXI has lasted almost as long as WoW, and has certainly outlasted games like Age of Conan or Tabula Rasa, so SQUE knows how to do MMO's well, and I'm really looking forward to something that can tear me away from WoW forever.

Uncharted 2 was shown and it looked absolutely gorgeous. I haven't (sadly) played the first, but I am painfully aware of how good it is and I plan to play it as soon as I subscribe to GameFly. MAG was shown which looked like a much more tactical multiplayer experience rather than your hectic L4D experiences. I can just see it now: entering the queue for a 256 player deathmatch, putting my controller down, going to the grocery store, coming back, and starting the match. I hope their matchmaking system is GODLY or this game will flop so very very hard. Racing games were announced which I never pay any attention to, even though I do recognize a racing game as a genre, as opposed to sports games which I do not. We also say MGS for the PSP which of course looks gorgeous and amazing and I will buy it.

PSP GO was announced, but not at E3 cuz it got leaked, therefore not in this blog, SORRY GO.

Assassin's Creed 2 looks absolutely insane with much more maneuverability and vareity of killing, rather than just sitting around with short sword waiting to counter, you can do much more, and there are TWO HIDDEN BLADES to kill two nub guards with, and it's very fancy. The aesthetic is still there with the soft colors, which I thoroughly loved in AC1. Should be a very exciting release.

Finally there is The Last Guardian, being made by the same ppl as Shadow of the Colossus (one of my FAVES). The trailer shown was very emotional, on the same level as the "Where the Wild Things Are" trailer. The interaction with the boy and his beast looks very touching, and I'm usually not very mooshy gooshy, but that game just looks like it will leave a lasting impression on you, because the trailer itself did that on me already. I look forward to that game very much so.

Even though Sony did a bad job at keeping it's Secrets this year, it still managed to keep several tricks up its sleeve, and they were very impressive indeed.

ON TODAY'S AGENDA

We have a ton of E3 stuff that's just been unveiled last week, and I'm in the mood to chat about it, even though no one reads these things. I just gotta get the gaming news off my flat, bony, white chest, cuz I have no friends to talk about this with...you'll never leave me will you mr. blogtextbox?

So first up is Nintendo's press conference, which was only semi awful this year.

The most important announcement was obviously the Vitality Sensor. The fact of the matter is that this piece of hardware is going to be ground breaking as far as Wii games go. Imagine: a game finally comes out for the Wii that makes you feel like you're actually having an adrenaline rush, but you know it can't be true b/c you're playing the Wii, so how do you check to see if the game is actually exciting you? BOOM, vitality sensor. 3-2-1...yes I am indeed excited abou this game, as is evident by my rapid heartrate.

But really, what was awesome? For me personally, the Golden Sun DS announcement was jaw dropping and unbelievably awesome. Golden Sun and GS: the Lost Age are two of my fave games of all time, and I can't wait to see what's next, even thought Camelot's not developing and the graphics have succumb to the DS' crappy polygonal standards.

Then on the Mario front was Super Mario Galaxy 2 (notice that U R MR GAY is still prominent) and New Super Mario Bros. Wii. Both look like a ton of fun for the hardcore crowd and casual gamers, respectively. I loved NSMB for DS and this looks like a ton of fun too, plus there's fun spinny waggle action, so who wouldn't love that?

There was also the Wii Motion Plus, but after seeing Sony and Microsoft's motion controll projects, I literally couldn't be any less excited about the new addition to my Wiimote. Nintendo is about to get embarrasingly behind in technology, and it won't be acceptabe by and gamers standards. BTW I'm a Nintendo fanboy and even I think this.

Also there was a showing of the new Metroid game titled Metroid: Other M which is being developed by Team Ninja surprisingly. TN is of course known for the incredibly difficult Ninja Gaiden series, and it shows in the footage of Samus, with her leaping around and pwning mob face. In this adventure Samus looks FARRRR less static; with much more leaping and ninja like action, which is a breath of air I think all the Nintendo IP's deserve. It never dawned on me to think what another developer could do for a Nintendo franchise, but so far the outcome looks amazing.

So ya, overall it was much more successful than last year, but they really need to up the excitement level and hire new speakers that are funny and cool (like meeeeeee) to deliver this news. I fell asleep twice watching and I drink Mt. Dew CONSTANTLY.

Oh and Wii Resort crap, but it's no Secret that literally NOBODY who knows what E3 is and watched the conference cares about Resort at all. Nobody. Like Roxas nobody.

ON TODAY'S AGENDA

We have the issue of BACKWARDS COMPATIBILITY.

For those of you who don't know what that is, I suggest that after recess and snack time, you google it. Backwards compatibility means can PS2 play PSX games? Can the DS play SP games? That sort of thing.

As the next gen consoles get made, the issue of backwards compatibility arrises again and again. The fact of the matter is that you're gonna be stuck between a rock and a bigger rock no matter what. Old games are good, and everybody loves going back and playing their old faves, but making new hardware that can still play those games is a nuisance to companies. So what should they do? Let's take a look at what each of the 3 giants have done with the issue, as each of them have done something unique.

Sony has dealt with the issue of backwards compatibility by keeping the old gen console around. The PS2 (that's a TWO) is still selling incredibly well, for those of you who don't know, and developers are even still making new games for it. IMAGINE THAT! As far as the actual back-comp for the PS3, it's a big pile of crap. It actually depends on what era of the PS3's life you bought your's in. If you got it at the beginning, when the PS3 was a GRILLION dollars, then there is some sort of back-comp, but it's not very thorough at all, especially with the new releases. If you used the grey, mooshy stuff between your ears and waited for the PS3's price to drop before you got one, then there is NO back-comp. Now, though I think this is an interesting but wrong way to go about things, I DO believe it's the only thing keeping Sony out of bankruptcy. With new releases and price drops on the PS2, the sales are rocketing, and putting money in Sony's pocket where the PS3 is failing.

Microsoft is all about DLC. They do things pretty well. They are constantly updating the software on the 360 with patches that allow it to read XBOX games. Even if you don't have LIVE (like ME maybe?) because you can't afford the whole setup, you can manually DL the patch off Microsoft's website onto a disc, and pop that disc into your console, and BOOM you can play Blinx whenever you want! Very convenient.

Nintendo does things the best, I believe. The Wii plays all GC games right off the bat, and there's really not much else to say about that. What's more interesting is what they do with their handheld systems, which they put out like Starbucks puts out new flavors of coffee. But with the handhelds they have FORCED the world to get with the times. It's like they're making new systems, which slowly don't play older games, and we're all like "Nintendo, what about these old games?" and they're like "what old games?". The DS didn't play Gameboy games, the DSi won't play GBA games, and so forth. They're like a no-nonsense grandma who won't feed you crap about your stupid nativity play. It was a crappy play and she hated it. Likewise, Nintendo says get over your nostalgia and play our new toy!

And that is the Secret to the success of back-comp.

ON TODAY'S AGENDA!!!

We have the ever famous, flaming, and FREAKING annoying console wars.

The console wars have raged furiously ever since idiots have roamed the earth. This constant battle over which console reigns supreme has taken place on forums, videos, blogs, and cute little man-diaries. Gamers who are DETERMINED to have something to hang their pride upon other than their own achievments (that's achievments irl) will defend their console of choice to the bitter end.

It's friggin' ridiculous.

I myself didn't know what the console wars were until a few months ago when I became active on the forum scene. The whole thing confused me utterly. I thought to myself "are they flaming about which CONSOLE is better"? It made no sense at all. These fanboys coining terms like M$, the SuckCube, the Nintendo Wiik sauce, and others. I really truly don't understand this whole thing.

I've never felt a tie to a particular console, I didn't know I was supposed to. What I HAVE tied myself to are the games. THE FREAKIN' GAMES!!! The things you actually play, remember? I myself am, to be specific, a Blizzard and SQE fanboy. But I tie myself to no console whatsoever. As a human blessed with some grey matter between my ears, I realized long ago that the games are what I enjoy, not the big box that makes them go. I've never turned on my N64 without putting a game in it and been like "wow, this is fun. The controller is totally...in my hands, and the actual console is...sitting there." What the heck are you people doing??? What a pathetic thing to argue over. Arguing over which console is better is like you and a friend getting a present and arguing over whose wrapping paper is prettier, INSTEAD OF WHICH GIFT IS ACTUALLY BETTER! I've literally never understood why you fanboys want to argue this, and I grow tired of it.

But the good news is, with OnLive, I might not have to listen to you idiots bicker any more :)

On Today's Agenda!

We have the new Final Fantasy XIII trailer which came out today, which looks AMAZING and reveals a ton of new information about the storyline, characters, and gameplay, even if you don't read Japanese like ME!

If you haven't seen it, GO WATCH IT FIRST before you read my overview of what we see here.

::SPOILERS::

OK! So first of all, this is a trailer for the main FFXIII, not Versus, the other PS3/360 branch of the XIII series. The trailer opens and we see a large capital ship surrounded by many smaller ones, which are the ships used to transport people who have come into contact with pulse. We then see the mysterious ponytail girl, whose name is Oerba Dia Vanilla, who is dressed in the quarantine outfits, showing she has come into contact with pulse. She (maybe) is talking saying that "the 13 days after we awoke, were the beginning of the end". So maybe the game takes place over a certain number of days, Majora's Mask-like without the time travel.

It then flashes to our main hero, Lightning, and she's on a train kicking a whole lot of Cocoon soldier butt. While she's melting face with her gunblade, er, gunsword (sorry Squall), it sounds like Mr. 33cm, whose real name is now Snow Villiers, comes over talking about stuff with Lightning before they started this mission. They talk about a Focus and the fal'Cie. The fal'Cie is some kind of organization, and the Focus must be complete before it can come down, but they don't know how to complete a Focus they don't know, and some girl says that she dreamt how to do it, which may be the mysterious ponytail girl. Focus may be some sort of power, I'm not really sure. Lightning then activates something at her side, so she can do that thing where she glows blue and, consequently, can fly in midair, upside down, and shoot a whole lotta buncha.

Next, it flashes to some good stuff. We see Snow Villiers on a bridge with 3 new characters, who are part of his rebel crew. There's a giant guy, with red spiked hair, holding a gun, a short blonde-haired kid wearing goggles, and a dark-haired female wielding, what looks like, a sniper rifle. All 4 are standing on a bridge and looking to be rescuing some of the people who were going to be transported for coming in contact with Pulse. Some are wearing the outfits, and some are not, which is weird. Snow Villiers assures them that no one will be moving to Pulse today, which it seems is where they are quarantined, so we know they're not held within the holy city of Cocoon. Snow Villiers says he'll clear a path, but the newly rescued prisoners insist they help with the fight, and we see Vanille among the group. Snow smiles and agrees to let them assist with the fight.

It then flashes back to the train Lightning is on, which is careening towards, supposedly, the location the other 4 party members are at with the rescued hostages. As the train travels, an important sounding voice on the intercom, possibly the leader of the city of Cocoon, is sarcastically talking. Many planes appear and begin shooting at Lightning's train. The leader guy talks about how if our "patriotic act" had not transpired, many people would have been exposed to the world below, Pulse, alluding to the fact that he is going to kill us, which he wouldn't have been able to do had we not shown ourselves. It shows many soldiers shooting a whole lotta buncha at the rescued hostages as they fight back themselves, longside the red haired guy. The soldiers are from PSICOM, the combatant force from the Sanctum, which is possibly some kind of council which oversees the holy city. The fight is going relatively well, until this giant ship appears. And then another giant ship appears, with a scorpion tail, closer to Lightning, I believe. Oh boy.

The ship near the 4 other members begins shooting everyone, and Snow loses his gun. The ship then fires a missile followed by a big KABOOM, and everyone is flipping out. It flashes to the scorpion ship, and Lightning is flipping and fighting it and stuff. The OTHER ship then sends out a creature, similar to the shadow beings seen in FFVII Advent Children, and is confronted by Snow, the red head guy, and the dark haired girl. Idunno where the short blonde kid's at by this point, possibly trying to get the hostages on the train. This is where the in game combat opens up.

OK, there is tons of info in these combat scenes. Basically, this is unlike any combat we've seen in a FF before. I can't read Japanese, so the super specifics I don't know, but I can definitely infer a lot from just watching it. Enemy HP is displayed next to the actually mob itself. You then have a long line that goes across the screen. In the bottom-right side you have your party HP and Combo Power bar (idunno what to call the bar). When it shows Snow fighting, there are 3 sets of these for him, the redhead, and the girl, but when it flashed to Lighting fighting, there are two. There is a guy with an afro helping Lightning, who appears for about one second, his name is Sazh Katzroy, he dual wields pistols and has a cute chocobo baby companion. The bottom left is where the fun happens. From the help line, down, you have your chain combos, your Combo Power bar, some sort of button (idunno what it does, it may cancel your current combo), then 5 choices of buttons for what you want to do. In the trailer, each person has 3 Combo Points total to spend, which slowly regenerate after being used. 4 of the 5 choices cost 1 point, and can be strung together in Combos of 3 to execute acrobatic attacks on the mob. You also have the 5th button, which costs 3 Combo Points, and is your character's magic attack, Lightning's is Fire (ironically), and Snow's is Blizzard. Also, when your combo finishes, it changes interface to 3 buttons, which I suppose are similar to attack, defend, or flee. Finally, it is seen that you can string attacks together with multiple characters, thought the specifics on that are yet to be seen.

The fight scene ends and Snow is tired and hurt when a bunch more monsters vaporize out of a blue beam thingy, and also a GIANT monster. Someone, I believe Snow says that it "was Serah, she saved us". We do not know who Serah is. Then a girl, maybe Lightning, says that maybe he forgot, but thanks to the previous male speaker, Serah is...and trails off, alluding to the fact that she's probably dead. While this speech is happening, it would seem that Lightning, the other four, and the hostages, are escaping on the train as the giant monster is chasing them, while Lightning tries to fend it off with a bazooka. The monster may be what's called a l'Cie (I believe that's pronounced leh-see-eh'), since someone says, when the monster attacks, that this was a l'Cie's power. She then says the fal'Cie cursed them, and that they are l'Cie now. The fal'Cie was mentioned earlier in the trailer, and is some kind of group involved with the Focus. The monster then Lightning bolts the train and the trailer ends.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR THIS GAME!!!

ON TODAY'S AGENDA

Today we will learn how to judge a good game. I feel I owe this advice to people given the number of overhyped games that have come out and were given good scores. You very un-famous people need my expert advice in deciding for yourselves if what you're playing is quality or not.

So we'll touch on the basic qualities of games:

Graphics: pretty self explanatory, how the game looks. Now it's important to remember that there can be a difference in how the game's visual aesthetic looks and how good the graphics are. For example, compare Metal Gear Solid 4 and Crysis. Whereas Crysis' graphics are some of the best ever seen in a game, personally I enjoy the way MSG4 looks more than I enjoy a game which merely looks realistic.

Soundtrack: what you here while you play the game. This is a HEAVILY underrated part of gaming. What some games, such as Fable, go through to create the best soundtrack possible is just insane. It's also good to note that Music games such as RockBand and Guitar Hero do not have true soundtracks. Those songs have already been good. Soundtracks are mood enhancers.

Dialogue and Voice Acting: I lump these two together because they go hand in hand. Dialogue is the actual writing itself and voice acting is done by the people who talk for the characters, which if you're Nintendo, is very few people. Dialogue should be natural but not boring, if the words seem like they've come from a Barney episode, something is wrong. Voice acting should convince you that the digital dude is actually saying those words. It should also not sound broken, given, not all gaming companies can afford to hire top rated voice actors, but there is a level of standard.

Character Development: How your character develops over the course of the game. He shouldn't stay the same. You should slowly learn things about the character, things should happen that alter how he behaves, the character should now be boring. Also, some characters don't speak, but that doesn't mean they can't develop well. This is something Bioshock does well, but where Dead Space fails, to cite some examples.

Story: What happens in the game. Games should be like books, only better. Clearly, some games don't need a story, such as Racers or Sports titles. And the more I think about it, the more I think FPS's should skip the campaign part and just focus on multiplayer since the stories are always so poor. But the story should enthrall you, and be good enough that if it went on paper, you would read it.

Gameplay: Is it fun to play what the game provides. This varies from genre to genre. In sports games, do you enjoy playing as each team? In shooters, does the combat seem fluid? In a platformer, is the platforming fun to play? It varies, but boils down to, is it fun?

Immersion: Do you feel like you are IN the game? This is very important. In a horror game, you should be scared, which Silent Hill does exceedingly well. You should feel what your character is feeling, not that you're controlling some digital puppet show.

Replayability: When you finish the game, do you want to start a new one right away, and will you be popping in the game in the future. The details of replayability are up for debate. Clearly, you want the game to be good enough that you want to play again. With some titles it's unnecessary to be good, whereas other titles focus completely on replayability, Diablo II (and all Blizzard titles really) is a good example.

Of course there are other finer points, like customization, multiplayer, price, etc. But pay attention to these aspects of the game while you play, and you'll be able to argue far more effectively on the forums. Go fanboys, go!

I