Firstly, I must offer sincere apologies. I often forget that not everyone is on a super-fast internet connection or has tweaked their network and PC to offer the slickest internet experience ever(TM). I also forget that Fasterfox doesn't work on Firefox 3, so no prefetching anymore (unless someone has an alternative *hint*).

So when I used my friend's PC - a rather elderly piece of equipment that can access pages about as fast as an asthmatic ant with some heavy shopping - to access Gamespot today I was a bit shocked. My profile is a bloody hazard. All those pretty pictures and boxshots and whatnot. It took about a minute to load. I'm sure this is worst case scenario but still, I am taking this opportunity both to shout 56k WARNING!!! at the top of my voice and to present a nice blog with no images whatsoever.

I could spend some time waffling about E3, except that for me this year E3 was a complete non-event. Oh yeah, I'm all happy about Final Fantasy XIII coming to X360, but that's only because it means I don't have to buy a PS3 for one game and not because of some deep, hidden meaning. I'm also a little psyched for Rage. No real reason, just because. I'm also a bit perplexed about a couple of Dragon Age things - namely why it's now got a highly unnecessary subtitle 'Origins' and why this much-touted next big Bioware PC exclusive, the successor to Neverwinter Nights, the future bearer of BG2's crown is suddenly coming to unnamed consoles. I'm not particularly bothered about it, just confused. I also must spank Bioware or whoever is responsible (you hearing me, EA?) for turning KotOR3 into a MMORPG. I don't like MMOs. Never have, probably never will. I'm a single-player gamer through and through, with multi-player mostly resigned to living room Burnout and Scene It parties, Unreal Tournament and Call of Duty sessions over the LAN and the occasional Halo co-op with the wizard.

Anyway, other than some nice trailers and pretty screenshots I'm quite disappointed in E3. I watched the Nintendo and Sony conferences live (although my emblem speaks otherwise), spending my nights sat huddled in a dark room, the light of the monitor my only source of comfort through countless hours of mind-numbing boredom and epic phail. The site fell over during Microsoft so I skipped that and watched it the next day. Other than the FF big announcement and the new dashboard (why?) Microsoft bored me to tears, Nintendo disappointed me greatly with their complete focus on the casual gamer and Sony had absolutely nothing to offer me - although that's partially my own fault since I don't own either a PS3 or PSP. I've got access to my brother's PSP but my playtime has to be limited for the sake of my poor twisted fingers.

So yeah: E308... pretty pointless.

Eh, what else...

If you wish you may trundle over to the CCU (that's the Candid Collector's Union, peeps). I've (finally) got a new article up on the front page. It's something I was working on a while back which I somehow lost and had to completely rewrite. It's done now; should be another couple of installments coming in the near future. Even if you don't want to read another wall of text (but it does have pictures!) feel free to hang around the union. We don't bite, unless someone blows into a cartridge.

Oh, and if you thought this was going to be about actual text adventures, let me direct you to a frustratingly excellent slice of my childhood. Graham Cluley presents: Humbug! Also Jacaranda Jim, although that one wasn't as good.

Ciao.