1. Start telling them about the wonderful encyclopedias you have in stock.
2. Start telling them your life story.
3. Tell them about your intense hatred for salespeople, then ask them where they live.
4. Reply to all their questions in song.
5. Ask for someone who can translate pig Latin, as you speak no other language.
6. Hand the phone to the youngest member in the house (under 5 years old)
7. As soon as they name the corporation, begin to bark endlessly.
8. Start trying to give them a psychological analysis.
9. Demand that they refer to you as Doctor Chopsticks.
10. Proudly describe what you found in your ear this morning.
11. Ask them what color underwear they're wearing today.
12. Describe your socks in detail.
13. Interrupt them repeatedly to describe the beauty of your new toaster.
14. Whiningly tell them that it is past your bedtime.
15. Midway through the conversation say, "Oh no Phil! You've done it again! I told you that knife was too sharp! Where are we gonna get the money for another funeral!?"
16. Ask them repeatedly if they believe in antelopes.
17. Refuse to answer any of their questions, as they may be one of THEM!
18. Ask them what would happen if you put a frog in the blender. Later tell them they were wrong.
19. Ask them for their phone number so that you can call them back and chat some more.
20. Burst into tears when they try to hang up and scream, "Don't leave me!!!!"
21. Tell them about the time you got stuck in the doggy door.
22. When they ask to speak to you, spend a long time trying to decide if that really is your name and after you realize it is, ask them to remind you of it occasionally.
23. Proudly explain that they are the first person that you have spoken to since your return to Earth.
24. In the middle of the conversation, start humming the Sesame Street theme song, when they try to speak, sound surprised and say, "Is someone there?"
25. Begin snoring.
26. Gleefully explain that 'they' have come for you and that you are going to a better place.

I'm going to try one of these some time:lol: I wonder what would happen if I did one of these to my sister's friends when they called....:lol: