I don't drink and I don't encourage it, but I thought some of these were pretty funny :D

1. I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
   --Frank Sinatra
2. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
   --Henny Youngman
3. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
   --Stephen Wright
4. You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline... it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
   --Frank Zappa
5. Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
   --Dave Barry

Sorry this is so short, but I still have homework to do :evil: :cry: Yes, my teachers did assign 3 or more hours of homework again :evil: :cry: :x