In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

1. On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair)
2. On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
3. On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....)
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost" (but, it's just a suggestion)
5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down!" (well...duh! A bit late, don't you think!?)
6. On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating" (and you thought???...)
7. On packaging for Rowenia iron: "Don't not iron clothes on body" (but wpuldn't this save me more time?)
8. On Boots Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication" (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head colds off those fork lifts)
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness" (and I'm taking this because???)
10. On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only" (as opposed to what?)
11. On a Japanese food processor: " Not to be used for the other use" (now, somebody help me out on this. I'm a bit curious)
12. On Sainsbury Peanuts: "Warning: Contains nuts" (talk about a news flash)
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts" (What the heck did they think I'd do with them?)
14. On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly" (I don't blame the company. I blame the parent's for this one.)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals" (Oh my! Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

I have a new favorite song! I heard it in a movie the other day called The Perfect Body. I can only hear the first 30 seconds of it, but I ordered the CD so I'll hear the whole song soon:D:P Here's the link if you want to hear the preview:

http://us.video.aol.com/audio.mini.adp?stream=http%3A//hurl.content.loudeye.com/scripts/hurl.exe%3Fclipid%3D004438101110006070%26cid%3D600097%26hack%3D.wma&title=&logo=http%3A//cdn.digitalcity.com/dalaillama/brand_aol