Job Puns (Why Can't I Keep a Job)

by trm6 on July 11, 2007 Comments

1. My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned - couldn't concentrate.
2. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. Mainly because it was a so-so job.
4. Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was exhausting.
5. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.
6. Then I tried to be a chef (figured it would add a little spice to my life), but I just didn't have the thyme.
7. Finally, I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
8. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
9. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patients.
10. Next was a job in a shoe factory. I tried but I just didn't fit in.
11. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
12. Thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
13. For a while, I worked in a blanket factory, but it folded.
14. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
15. I got a job at a zoo, feeding giraffes, but I was fired, because I wasn't up to it.
16. So then I got a job in a gymnasium (work-out-center), but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
17. Next, I found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking.
18. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it.
19. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.