Movie Writer's Guide (part 3)

by trm6 on October 27, 2007 Comments

1. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts, so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
2. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
3. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
4. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts -- your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one, by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
6. A person, when knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.
7. No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
8. Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
9. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
10. You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
11. Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds -- unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.
12. An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur, will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.
13. Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment.