I had a couple of stories to tell, but it would make too long a blog. Let's stick to the matters at hand!

Merriam-Webster announced the new words for its dictionary this year. Can you make a sentence or two out of them? :)

Okay, I'll tell one story. :) Monday, I was leaving work to pick up lunch. It was really hot. Our main street is being worked on, so I've got to take this one lane road down a block to get on another main street. And it happened. There's a puddle on the left side of the road, and there's this dude on the sidewalk, leaning against some wood pallets against a building. Wrap around shades, no shirt, brown baggy pants.

Yeah, I splashed him. :) I've never done that! Soaked him. I mean, the puddle soaked him. I was just a catalyst. I looked back in my rear view mirror. I had my window down. He had shades off, pants clinging to his legs. "Aww, dude! DUDE!" All I could say was "Sorry man... I'm SORRY." I kept moving! Has that ever happened to you?

Here's The New Words
They're in alphabetical order, and the date is the first time they are known to be used in print communications. There were over 100 words inducted, but these are the ones featured by the "mainstream media."

Air quotes (1989): gesture made by raising and flexing the index and middle fingers of both hands, used to call attention to a spoken word or expression.

Dark energy (1998): hypothetical form of energy that produces a force that opposes gravity and is thought to cause the accelerating expansion of the universe.

Dirty bomb (1956): bomb designed to release radioactive material.

Dwarf planet (1993): celestial body that orbits the sun and has a spherical shape, but is too small to disturb other objects from its orbit.

Fanboy (1919): boy who is an enthusiastic devotee, such as of comics or movies.

Note: 1919? It's been around since 1919, and it's just now being put in the dictionary? I'm a Fanboy of Fanboy! :)

Infinity pool (1992): outdoor swimming pool with an edge over which water flows into a trough, but seems to flow into the horizon.

Jukebox musical (1993): musical that features popular songs from the past.

Malware (1990): software designed to interfere with a computer's normal functioning.

Mental health day (1971): day that an employee takes off from work to relieve stress or renew vitality.

Mondegreen (1954): word or phrase that results from a mishearing of something said or sung. From the mishearing in a Scottish ballad of "laid him on the green" as "Lady Mondegreen."

Note: Mondegreen is my favorite new word! Samples of Mondegreen include: When Creedance Clearwater Revival (CCR) sings, "There's a bad moon on the rise," People hear "There's a bathroom on the right." Or when Jimi Hendrix sings, "Excuse me, while I kiss the sky," people hear, "Excuse me, while I kiss this guy!" In the most extreme example I know, a friend of mine thought the Beatle's tune "Day Tripper" was "State Trooper." "He was a State Trooper, and I'm a driver yeah! It took me so long to find out, but I found out." For real. :) It happens all the time!

Netroots (2003): grassroots political activists who communicate via the Internet, especially by blogs.

Pescatarian (1993): vegetarian whose diet includes fish.

Pretexting (1992): presenting oneself as someone else to obtain private information.

Prosecco (1881): a dry Italian sparkling wine.

Racino (1995): racetrack at which slot machines are available for gamblers.

Soju (1978): a Korean vodka distilled from rice.

Subprime (1995) 1: having or being an interest rate that is higher than a prime rate and is extended especially to low-income borrowers; 2: extending or obtaining a subprime loan.

Texas Hold 'em (1995): Poker in which each player is dealt two cards face down and all players share five cards dealt face-up.

Webinar (1998): live, online educational presentation during which participating viewers can submit questions and comments.

Wing nut (circa 1900): Slang: one who advocates extreme measures or changes; radical.

I'll try a sentence or few:
We were drinking Prosecco and Soju by the infinity pool when fanboy shows up, pretexting himself as a netroot who participated in one of my webinars. He brought some "subprime" (airquotes in the stage play) ribs for the grill. That's when I busted him, because I'm a Pescatarian, and he's a wing nut.

Everyone who tries to use these new words in a sentence or two gets a GOLD STAR! :) Just to make this a really long blog, here's the other story.

I was waiting for my bro to come home from work this afternoon, and he was running late. I was about to nod off in my Executive Chair, when my cat, Miss Prissy, jumps up in the window with a big bird in her mouth! She jumps down to the floor, runs under my computer table, and drops it. She just walks out from under the table and lays down, all smug like.

Naturally, I jump up and open the door and say, "Miss Prissy, pick that bird up and take that bird out of here!" The bird is obviously dead. Its neck was broken back, I guess MP snapped it. I try again. "MISS PRISSY, PICK THAT BIRD UP AND TAKE THAT BIRD OUT OF HERE!!!" I couldn't have been clearer. But she just lies there. She was quite proud of herself.

Finally I say, "If you won't get the bird out, I will." So I take the broom and brush the bird out from under the table. It's lying there between MP and me. MP looks up at me. Then the bird cocks its head up, and MP looks at the bird. They're like two feet apart, eye to eye. Suddenly, the bird lifts its wings up, and takes flight between us! She shoots towards the wall, banks left, and out the window! :)

MP wasn't happy at all. And I've been razzing her all night! But I've told her many times not to bring birds into the House. She's been a bad girl, now she's grounded to her computer.

Heeyyy Miss Prissy!

Where's the Bird? :)

And before I go, Slow Burn Random Fact #9: It's a twofer: I hate lobster, and I've never seen the movie Titanic! I'm pretty sure I'm the only one with both those traits. Listening to Pink Floyd right now, Wish You Were Here. "We're just two lost souls living in a fish bowl, year after year." I'll bet there's a Mondegreen in there somewhere!

:)
TG