How did I...err the girl screw up? She did one of the worst things you can do at that age: be a witch. An evil terrible witch. She had a couple of friends from grade school but they all forgot about her because they were home-schooled and she was public schooled. If you don't understand the differences then...it's just really stupid. Home-schoolers are convinced that people who go to public school are loud, foul-mouthed, drug-using jerks and public-schoolers are convinced that home-schoolers are nerdy dorks who win lots of spelling bees and have no social life. I have done both. I can say with all honesty that both suck in their own special way...*laughs* So on with the story. She alienated her friends by ignoring them and being mean to her guy friend by flirting and then being a jerk alternatively. Which is despicable. Seriously. I'm a girl. And I know it's wrong. And then she kept liking the jerky guy at school even though he was a total retard He made fun of the sweet old lady teachers and said crass things about certain parts of the anatomy. Keep in mind that this is 6th grade I'm describing. Some of the details are a little foggy but this is what it was like. But then it hit her like a load of bricks. The guy really was an ugly jerk. What had made her like him in the first place? It was just one of those crazy things. A hormonal surge. Unfortunatly he had only just found out about her liking him. She denied it with all her heart. But everyone else knew and never told him. The troubles weren't over yet. There was still half a year left. Could she make it? You bet all the gil I stole from Sephiroth , she did! Otherwise, I wouldn't be writing this. I would be dead and hidden in one of the gym lockers. :P More to come soon about....the 2nd half.
After writing this, I'm starting to realize that a lot of what happened is funny. But also disturbing. Some of what happened then affects me subconsciously now. Like why I don't trust people in general. And how I still feel like I'm walking on eggshells with a lot of my friends. I just don't get it. That's why I'm just writing this all out and posting it on the Internet. Because...maybe someone out there will. Get it I mean. This may seem stupid and all...but...it was a big deal then. Hey, it's still a big deal now. Cause I have to get these problems out in the open. Or else I'll just have to live with keeping everything inside and that is NOT a good thing. Never is.
I thought that since I've been sort of gloomy lately , I might add a nice happy little bit to all this. On Friday, I will finally end the play that I'm in. By end I mean have an opening night and finally have a "real" audience. With applause and flowers. This will be great because after that...my load (of work) will go down. Maybe down enough to finish the flashbacks. And start on some new stuff. I bet all of you can't wait! (being sarcastic)
---twilightlullaby