Not much to say really. I'm just writing down this blog because it's just one of those days that you want to remember for a while to come.

PART 1:

Today, I was hungry. I mean, sure I get hungry every day, but today was an exception. I was hungry AND lazy. So instead of cooking or whipping up something small as usual, I decided to head over to some random Subway joint for a sandwich. Now, I've never been to a subway store before in my six years of living in America. However, before you scream heresy, I'll have you know I've had subway sandwiches several times in my life…I just never got them myself (I have minions – some of you may prefer to call them friends/connections, but not me).

Anyways, I went through the usual Subway rigmarole that I've heard so much about. I commanded the poor bloke behind the counter on what I like on my sandwiches. The usual pickle here, the onion there, cucumber blah, blah, blah, and all that good stuff. BUT WHEN IT CAME TIME TO PUT ON SOME CONDIMENTS….

They didn't have ketchup….

How do you not have ketchup? I mean, I know it's unorthodox to put ketchup on your sandwich, but come on…it's ketchup. It's like, squeezed tomatoes man. How do you not have squeezed tomatoes for those of us who like to put squeezed tomatoes on our sandwiches?

Suffice to say, I was pissed. The guy behind the counter was like, "I'm sorry sir, Subway does not hold ketchup." I asked him why and he just kept saying, "We just don't sir."

It's a good thing I have ketchup at home, because I promised myself -at that moment- that I would have it my way.

PART 2:

So I drove home with my subway sandwich, entered the garage, went to my parking spot and seriously scratched the left, rear door of my bloody red Toyota prius. Why you ask? Because the bloody guy who usually parks next to me decided - for some reason unbeknownst to me – to park almost inside MY parking spot. As if the parking space isn't small enough, His car was right on the dividing line. I noticed his positioning too late and I was going to ram into his car, but nooooo, I had to be nice (well, more financially concious than nice, really), so I had to steer away from his car and, ultimately, graze my rear door on a concrete beam.

Sigh…I wonder how much it will cost to have it painted.

Life goes on though. :P

PART 3:

On a more lighter note, my copy of mass effect 2 finally came today. I'm installing the Cerberus pack as I type this in, so I can't wait to get started on the game.

I've been avoiding this game like the plague mainly because I'm one of those few "elitists" that didn't like the "Action Adventure" route Resident Evil 4 took. Despite my reluctance, I had to jump off my high horse and buy it since it was dirt cheap. I went home, chucked the disc from the case, glanced at it, scoffed here and there, then popped it in my, ever so precious, Pee Es Tripple for the hizzle my nizzle.

The game immediately introduces us to the muscular hero as he drives through the terrains of what seems like a mix between a semi-arid/savannah landscape while narrating something about government conspiracies. He eventually makes his way to a little shanty town and meets an exotic looking African female with a South African accent.

The Kiswahili speaking "gate keeper" approaches her and states:

Wewe! Huyu mgeni ana fanya nini hapa?

Translation: "Hey You! What's this visitor doing here?"

This is where my interest in the game peaked. Apparently the devs took the time to integrate another language into the game. That alone speaks volumes about the amount of dedication that went into the game right? I was impressed.

I head further into the village of Kijuju (which by the way is a blatantly clear spoof of off Kijiji which simply means village...so we will hence forth call it the village of village.)

So anyways, as I walk around the Village of Village, I start appreciating the game even more. They've managed to capture the rural African town setting pretty well…with the exception of all the random violence, debauchery, and mysteriousness of course.

Anyways, I managed to find my way to a Middle Eastern man located in the village who handed me my weapons. It didn't make much sense to me so I decided to declare him Egyptian. I then headed deeper into the village where I was attacked by a group of villagers as they shouted:

Yuko Kule: There he/she is.

Ua: Kill

Amerikani Nguruwe wewe: American Pig you.

Panya: Rat

I laughed so hard at how the language was used.

And if you think that's funny, then let me tell you about the "executioner scene."

Those who've played the game know that there's a man giving a speech on top of a platform as an executioner waits to behead the Middle Eastern…errr the Egyptian.

The speech goes something like this…

Wanatuitia njia ya : They're calling us way of

Wanalipa uso wao : They're paying their faces

And then the Egyptian guy laments a few words that probably made the most sense in that scene:

"You don't know what you're talking about."

Truer words have never been spoken.

Then the guy with the megaphone spots Chris and points at him exclaiming:

Hapo ndani, waue wote: In there, kill them all.

Wacha wawe tolewe damu ya njia ya juu: let their blood be removed in the ways of upwards ( huh? lol)

I can only wonder how RE4 was in terms of language >.>

I'm only in chapter 2-3 and I'm laughing a lot.

Anyways, I'm tired of typing so I'll just conclude by stating that I'd recommend it to anyone who knows Kiswahili or has some unbiased knowledge of Africa for some good laughs.

Aside from that, if you enjoyed RE4, I doubt you'd hate this game. It is still the same action oriented game with the same mechanics and you should definitely pick it up.