The first half of that title: 

So upon a trip to Red Robin that resulted in great discomfort,I'm pretty sure I had the best waiter ever.  He told us many things, including one story about his wife (we had to try so hard not to laugh, aside from the lack of a ring, he was extremely young, and one of the most flambouyant men I've ever met), he topped it off when commenting on my friend's Weezer shirt.

After realizing what she was wearing, he asked if she knew their logo, that familiar "W,"  and asked if she had ever noticed it's similarity to the Whataburger logo, while gesticulating the large letter with his fingers.

He then explained, quite loudly I might add, "You ever wonder if..."

He makes a quick exagerated jab with his arm, with a very intense look on his face

"...that's a little punch at corporate America?!"

Jesus + Coffee + Alliteration = "Sip your Sins away!"

So I was studying at some coffee shop (called Java Connection) this afternoon (from 4-10, actually), and we found that there was a rather large room attached to the shop, labeled as "The Study."  Curiosity got the best of us, so we entered, and what did we find, but a church renting space from the shopping center.

We studied in there for awhile, as it was quite roomy, but we left shortly after, as it was making my friend very uncomfortable.  I guess one person can only handle mini-tapestries that say things like "God's in the House!" for so many minutes.  Something which I know I can certainly feel for.

So we moved back to the main shop, and I went out for a smoke break, when I noticed that the church was the "Christian Connection Church."

This raised many questions, and after some asking around, we found that the two were, in fact linked.  She was concerned that our coffee purchases were going to fund the house that God's in, but I think I put her fears to rest when I told her that it was probably the other way around.  Those collection baskets are surely good for something.

Still, this civil liberty breaking union of church and coffee, should lead to amazing marketing opportunities, none of which Java Connection seems to be taking advantage of.

Still we put off our symbolic logic work (the above title, by the way, is symbolic equation which I wrote to symbolize my hatred for Dr. Ewing Chinn, can you guess what it means?), and got to work for our new favorite businesship and their new marketing campaign.

     Marketing Campaigns:

-  Raise the suspicion that their was no wine at the Last Supper, and propose that instead Jesus had been passing around a steaming cup of Joe.

- Get the church members to bless the coffee grinds, and institute baptism by coffee (iced, of course).

- Tying into the first, inform the masses that coffee is the new blood of Christ, and toasted muffins or paninis are the new body of Christ.  Need a quick reaffirmation of your beliefs, but no time for communion?  Drop on in, and get buzzed too!!

- The inevitible introduction of their juice bar serving fresh squeezed "Jesus Juice." 

     Slogans:

- "Sweet Salvation in every Sip!"

- "Sip your Sins away with a Strawberry Sizzle!"

- "Transubstantiation just took a trip to Flavor Country!"

- "Confession in a Cup" 

Needless to say, it made the painful subject of logic much less painful.  Unfortunately, we are getting back together at about 4:00 this morning to pick up where we left off.  Considering I normally can't sleep before 5, I'd say that means that I am quite literally not getting any sleep tonight.