well! this is a weird one for sure!
YO YO YO YO YO, PEOPLEZ!!!!!! my name is not important! and today, i'm reviewing sonic zero gravity (obviously)!!!!!!
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO READ THE FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BECAUSE IT'S NOT PART OF THE REVIEW!!
so, i been reading all this stuff about people saying that sonic zero gravity is the worst sonic game ever. well, this is not the worst sonic game ever, it's the weirdest (in my opinion). well, the game, is not bad, but it's not good either. and i wanted to rate it a score that would show that the game is not bad or good, and the 5 is in the middle, so i gave it a 5. but the 5 on gamespot's rating system means mediocre. why couldn't they make the 5 mean average? because i don't think the game is mediocre. and anyway, if you check out the "about the rating system", which is right next to the "review the game" button, when you look at the description for the 5 on the rating system, it will say this: "A 5-range score refers to a game that's 'merely average' in the negative sense." key words: MERELY AVERAGE. so, why not make the 5 mean average? WAIT! WHY AM I TALKING ABOUT THIS ANYWAY?!?!?!?! ok. whatever. summary for this paragraph: sonic zero gravity is not mediocre, the 5 on the rating scale should mean average, and i talk to much about useless things.
THE PART THAT'S NOT ABOUT THE REVIEW IS OVER NOW!!
so, let me tell you what the game is like. first off, NO, IT IS NOT AN ADVENTURE GAME, IT'S A RACING GAME!!!! next, it is WAY too easy. so, you race on these weird, floating wave boards. the wave boards can change if you collect enough rings while you're racing. they can be turned into motorcycle looking things, skateboard looking things, or, flying UFO/go kart things. i know it sounds weird, but at least it's not as weird as sonic r where you run around the tracks. so, like i said, there were the weird wave boards, but you can buy some at the store, which has weirder wave boards. you buy them with none other than TEH RINGS!!!!!!! (yes, i know i just copied that from Christian Fautex's review of superman 64, so don't nag, naggers!) ok, so, the wave boards they sell are really weird, like remember how i said what wave boards turn into which things? well, they sell this one wave board where it can turn into all the things i named before. nice, huh? ok. i'm done talking about this now.
ok! so, about the plot, it makes no sense. it's just a bunch of random things fused together to make the plot. i don't even get the plot. probably none of us do. and there's 2 sides to the story. there's the hero's side, and the babylonian side (i don't even know what they mean by babylonian). when you do the hero's side, you get to play as sonic, tails, knuckles, and i think you get to play as amy, too. i don't really remember. and if you do the babylonian side (which you can only do if you beat the hero's side), you get to play as jet, storm, or wave. the babylonian people have weird names, don't they?!
the grafix in this game are, actually really good. everything is all shiny, and the people are pretty well made. but, they lack detail. and it's very noticeable, too. and if you're wondering about the tracks, well, they're confusing. there all all these obstacles that you can only clear if you're on the right kind of wave board. but, it's all demented obstacles (except for the grinding rails, of course!). so, in the tracks, besides the demented obstacles, there are 1,000 different shortcuts. the shortcuts are demented, too! now, let me tell you all the stuff you can do on the tracks. you can knock people out of your way using a special power-up, you can get random speed boosts, you can make random sharp turns, and you can make HUGE jumps. but, the problem with that on the tracks is that they tell you what to do to do that stuff at the last second, and if you can't do it fast enough, you end up in last place. so, i guess you get the idea now.
ok. so, the controls, are pretty good........ depending on which controller you use, that is. like, you can play by holding the wii mote horizontally, and tilting the wii mote left or right, to move, well, left or right. or, you can pay with the wii mote held vertically, which controls horribly. or, you can even use the game cube controller!
the music in this game is repetitive and really bad. like, it's just horrible. and the voice acting is really bad too. the characters say the same things at least 4 times when you race, so it gets annoying. the sound effects are really annoying also. please make sure that when you play this game, you put the tv on mute.
i'm almost done, to the annoyed people. i'll just name the good and bad stuff now!
good stuff: good grafix, there's more than 1 way to play this game if you're talkin' 'bout the controls, the wave boards are petty cool.
not good stuff: plot makes no sense, one of the ways to control the people works like ****, grafix lack detail, the game gives you the instructions to do the cool tricks a little to late.
so, this game is ok. if you want it, RENT IT!!!!!! PLEASE RATE!!!!!