Actually, it's proper writing. I just finished a philosophy major and this is how they encourage you to write. In the very first paragraph, state exactly what you're trying to argue. Right in the first paragraph. And this is how not just university students are told to write, but is also how professional philosophers write. Wow that sounds funny.clicketyclick
A scientific essay is something different, something which I already mentioned in my previous post. I am very well aware of how to write an essay, but this is not an article that has to clarify its purpose - it's a review of a video game, and it is nonsensical to think you have to spill the beans in the first sentence, let alone in such a way. Seeing as his target audience probably isn't your usual gamer (as I don't think this is a gaming website), he will probably want to introduce the subject before giving his opinion on it - the former of which he fails to do in the entire review. If I were ignorant of the latest gaming trends, I would have no idea how to play this game after reading this article. And mind that, in a scientific article, one of the FIRST things you do is to introduce the subject.
Also, if you're judging this review by Academic standards, how can you ignore his horrid argumentation structure? He claims that the game is not fun for adults because is it kiddy. But why? Why doesn't it appeal to adults? Why do you think the music is bad? This review is just a series of random statements with no clarification.
But all of that is still not considering the weirdness of you trying to compare a random statement about SMG2 being a good game for his nephew Kyle to the introduction of a scientific thesis. I've actually had to write reviews for Academic writing classes, and I can guarantee you that if I turn in something like this, I probably wouldn't even get points for trying.
"He did not criticise reviewers instead of the game. That was what you call "building up tension". The tension is that it seems no-one else feels the same way and his POV is not being reflected by any reviewers. This is the tension point because it surprises him that no-one finds a single point of criticism for the game - that it's just universal praise everywhere. We've all had a game where everyone seems to praise it to the skies and we're like "what? seriously? really? I had a completely different experience. Were we playing the same game? Why does everyone think it's great? Am I alone here? Am I crazy or something?" And that's the tension point he was bringing up."
Again, it's not necessarily the fact that he does this (although any attempt to start some kind of polemic or whatever should be magnificent or left out altogether), but the fashion in which he does it. Take this sentence for instance:
"With all due respect to other reviewers, this is kids' stuff. Are you really enjoying this game so much? Really? Really?"
Do you honestly believe such a sentence belongs in a review that pretends to be halfway professional?
"Then he explained why he disagreed WHILE still making it clear that they weren't wrong to say it's a good game. He's not disagreeing with them that it's good, but just that it is lacking something that would make it appeal to most adults who didn't grow up with nintendo. Now you say his points don't describe "something fundamentally wrong with the game" and call it poor argumentation because of that. However, that's merely because you disagree! The found frustrating and annoying... well, you were ok with them. But just because you were ok with them doesn't mean they aren't valid problems!!!!"
As I said, I haven't play this game, hence why I don't even HAVE an opinion on it, so I really do have no clue why you are implying that I don't like this review because I allegedly accept some frustrations he doesn't. I do know, how to play Wii games, and how to play SMG1. If he pointing the Wiimote at the screen all the time makes your hand go numb, you're seriously doing it wrong. When he said this, I imagined this guy sitting in front of the television with his arm pointed straight forward holding the Wiimote in the direction of the screen. Yes, then you will get a sore arm. If you just let your hand rest on your lap, there is no problem. (That's not even mentioning that you don't actually have to point the Wiimote at the screen about 99% of the time.) So if this complaint results from the fact that he is probably holding the controller the wrong way (which I would imagine seeing as he doesn't even know what they're called), is it a valid complaint about the game itself? No, it isn't. This has nothing to do with my opinion on the game, as I already explained in this paragraph as well as in my previous post, but somehow people keep insisting on trying to discredit opinions they don't agree with as personal bias (ironic, isn't it?).
"And that's really the whole purpose of a review, isn't it? Everyone states what they like and dislike. You read those things to see if you dislike those same things as much as they do (in which case you'll probably have just as negative an opinion as they do and should avoid the game) or if you don't mind those things. If you don't mind the things they dislike, you're probably not going to dislike the game as much as they do! And of course vice versa with the things they liked. Yes, the whole point of reviews is to gather a bunch of different people's opinions on a game so you can get a full set of positives and negatives about a game, and judge for yourself how much each point matters to you, and on that basis, make an informed decision about whether to invest your hard-earned money in the game. And for that very reason, I hope this review counts to metacritic. The more opinions the better. Always. Always. Always."
As someone who is looking to buy SMG2, I actually found this review unhelpful, as it presents nothing but a few vague complaints in a disorganised fashion (why didn't he try to tell us a bit more about the music, for instance?). Now that I think of it, the most basic problem of this review is that he only says THAT he dislikes certain aspects, but fails to explain WHY. This is why this review is terrible. As I explained already, I'm actually looking for more critical reviews as the mindless praise is often not very informative, but this review failed to satisfy that need in anyway.
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