@BranKetra: Let's hug it out XD
lol
This topic is locked from further discussion.
Can't say I call most of these instances "harassment." A lot of them were just saying "Have a nice day" and "Have a blessed evening." Sure, a few of them were downright rude, but "Have a blessed evening" is harassment? Come on...
I think it's a stretch to call most of those encounters "harassment". Some people just enjoy playing the victim. As a feminist I would find it hard to feel hard done by getting cat called in New York when other women are being murdered and abused on a daily basis in other countries all around the world.
I think it's a stretch to call most of those encounters "harassment". Some people just enjoy playing the victim. As a feminist I would find it hard to feel hard done by getting cat called in New York when other women are being murdered and abused on a daily basis in other countries all around the world.
Except its possible to make changes to harassment and abuse in first world countries. I don't see why we should worry about those other backwards countries. Countries like Afghanistan and Somalia will likely NEVER change. Abuse and violence against women is actually growing worse in those regions as time goes on.
I'm guessing a lot of you also think "it's actually about ethics in videogame journalism" too, right?
Catcalling ranges from annoying to scary, but one thing it always is is unnecessary. Let's face it, the vast majority of the people complaining about feminism (some use the detestable word "********") are men. Same as how most people complaining about minorities taking a stand against what they consider racism are white people. If THEY take issue with the way THEY'RE being treated, perhaps we should stop and listen to what they have to say rather than tell them why they're wrong.
No, catcalling ranges from enjoyable to scary, depending on if its a woman that enjoys attention from men or not and i think a lot of them do. Particularly young women.
White males complaining about any of that probably has a lot to do with how women and minorities are taking issue with things and what exactly it is they plan to do about it. Are we just going to pretend there is no hostility, shaming, men-bashing, or outright lying and stretching facts in order to increase their perceived victimhood? As an individual example, if i've offended someone, of course they can let me know about it but it still matters how i'm approached. People cant expect to say whatever vulgar things they want just because their offended and i will still humbly apologize. For all they know, the offense wasn't even intentional. A calm and polite discussion is required to resolve the issue weather their offended or not.
On the subject of catcalls as an example. Men are particularly resentful of women complaining about it probably because they think its bullshit that society places the obligation on them to be the aggressors for all things in relationships to begin with. That is essentially the only reason those catcalls occur. Women set the tone and pace for everything related to sex and relationships. It happens on their terms or not at all. This is obvious and it has been this way forever. Sex from a woman is always a gift that any man had better appreciate. That is why it is a lot more acceptable for female teachers to essentially rape their male students and why male students feel enormous pressure to comply with it.
I think it's a stretch to call most of those encounters "harassment". Some people just enjoy playing the victim. As a feminist I would find it hard to feel hard done by getting cat called in New York when other women are being murdered and abused on a daily basis in other countries all around the world.
Except its possible to make changes to harassment and abuse in first world countries. I don't see why we should worry about those other backwards countries. Countries like Afghanistan and Somalia will likely NEVER change. Abuse and violence against women is actually growing worse in those regions as time goes on.
Like I said, "harrasment and abuse" is a bit of a stretch for cat calling. There were some creeps in that video, but creeps are always going to be creeps so there is not much you can do about them. Long story short? She needs to get the **** over herself and get on with her life. There are bigger concerns than cat calling in the world.
the catcalling articles/viral videos are getting annoying. all this feminism stuff is. they make some good points and have a decent message but damned if they dont shove it down your throat every single day on the web. so over it.
I'm not sure I'd call all of that harassment but I would call it unwelcome. A quick hello is one thing and I tend to give people (not just random men) the benefit of the doubt and acknowledge them. But just because someone compliments you doesn't mean you have to be grateful or pleased about it. You certainly don't have to be mean, and if you don't want to talk to them or take things further that's fine. Just keep moving and no big deal. But to think that someone must appreciate a stranger's comments just because they're "nice" just doesn't work for me. The whole thing would make me uncomfortable, that's really the best word I can think of. It doesn't matter if someone is saying something nice or rude. If it makes me uncomfortable I'd rather not hear it.
How do expect men to pick up women if they don't attempt to start a conversation?
Last time I checked women like assertive, not passive men.
this is what i dont get either. women expect men to hit on them wtf is the point of this video.
@BranKetra: So do you often compliment complete strangers for no reason other than the fact that they walked in front of you and you want them to feel better about themselves?
sometimes i do it just because i like something about them... it has nothing to do with me really.
This debate seems so loaded. Like on Fox news level when they have a token Democrat on to look stupid.
The guy just sounds so damn stupid throughout the video...
The great thing about being a cop is that I can go up to a guy who has just been extremely rude to a woman (like quite a few of the guys in this viral video were), tell them to shut the **** up, and see great satisfaction from the woman that somebody is trying to make the place a little bit more safe for them.
It has a fantastically sobering effect on guys at the bar scene, as well.
Moral of the story: Don't be a scumbag. Because there are cops that see it and can do something about it.
The great thing about being a cop is that I can go up to a guy who has just been extremely rude to a woman (like quite a few of the guys in this viral video were), tell them to shut the **** up, and see great satisfaction from the woman that somebody is trying to make the place a little bit more safe for them.
It has a fantastically sobering effect on guys at the bar scene, as well.
Moral of the story: Don't be a scumbag. Because there are cops that see it and can do something about it.
and what if woman was rude to man? assault a man? you only see one demential. femenist woman are sexist who hate man and you are one of them
I never talk rude to woman because im waay too badass. i just troll them. for example there was a girl in gaming shop who was bying fallout 3 to gift someone. she said she want to gift it to someone. i came closely. saw another fallout 3 copy. grab it and say hmmmm a consolized trash game' so she can heard. it makes me cool.
-My name is lo wang
The great thing about being a cop is that I can go up to a guy who has just been extremely rude to a woman (like quite a few of the guys in this viral video were), tell them to shut the **** up, and see great satisfaction from the woman that somebody is trying to make the place a little bit more safe for them.
It has a fantastically sobering effect on guys at the bar scene, as well.
Moral of the story: Don't be a scumbag. Because there are cops that see it and can do something about it.
And what makes you think that those women need you to save them? Aren't they able to fend for themselves? Unless they're following her or being physically abusive and she's not being able to protect herself she doesn't need a man saving her from other men...that kind of attitude can sometimes be part of the problem. Some asshole decided to take it upon himself to catcall a woman with complete disregard to her wishes, then comes a cop who tells the guys off with complete disregard to her wishes...
LOL...hilarious. That is pure female logic there.
Women: Cat calling is abuse and harassment!
Cops: Ok, sees woman being harassed by cat calling, tries to put a stop to it
Women: I didn't want you to do that either, that's against my wishes!
Reminds me of scene from White Men Can't Jump:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rV37oPF95_s
@Renevent42: I would simply call it "get your f'ing nose out of my business" logic =) If I'm having an argument with someone, unless the other guy tries to stab me I wouldn't want a cop sticking his nose in my business just because he has a badge. Then again, he probably wouldn't because I'm a guy and "saving" a guy gives no white knight points.
@Renevent42: I would simply call it "get your f'ing nose out of my business" logic =) If I'm having an argument with someone, unless the other guy tries to stab me I wouldn't want a cop sticking his nose in my business just because he has a badge. Then again, he probably wouldn't because I'm a guy and "saving" a guy gives no white knight points.
It's a cop's job to stop abuse and harassment from happening. A cop does the same thing if he sees two dudes screaming at each other in the street about to duke it out.
@Renevent42: Agreed, but there's a difference between a shoving match and a "nice ass" comment...I'm sure if somebody walked past you and said "Nice package, want to whip it out for me?" you wouldn't start calling 911...yes, it's abusive behaviour but not exactly something for the police to handle.
@Renevent42: Agreed, but there's a difference between a shoving match and a "nice ass" comment...I'm sure if somebody walked past you and said "Nice package, want to whip it out for me?" you wouldn't start calling 911...yes, it's abusive behaviour but not exactly something for the police to handle.
I've seen cops getting involved in situations where people were just being verbally abusive in a public place. Actually, I'd imagine that's not uncommon at all.
@Renevent42: I think that's being overzealous. Having a disagreement in public is not against the law where I live, not sure about there. Here cops would probably stick around to see if it was just 2 people blowing steam or if it got dangerous but they wouldn't get involved if there were no signs of violence...then again, here signs of violence would be grabbing a guy by the collar, no danger of anyone pulling a gun, so if there's guns where you live I can understand the policemen feeling the need to be preemptive.
@Renevent42: I think that's being overzealous. Having a disagreement in public is not against the law where I live, not sure about there. Here cops would probably stick around to see if it was just 2 people blowing steam or if it got dangerous but they wouldn't get involved if there were no signs of violence...then again, here signs of violence would be grabbing a guy by the collar, no danger of anyone pulling a gun, so if there's guns where you live I can understand the policemen feeling the need to be preemptive.
Airshocker didn't say it was against the law or that he threatened to arrest the guy...just that he saw an abusive situation and stopped it. That's the same as any cop seeing two dudes yelling at each other in public and a cop comes by and puts a stop the situation...something I've seen MANY times.
You are also mincing words now...you categorize what the police won't respond to as a disagreement but you also want to call cat calling abuse and harassment. Yes, police don't typically get involved in disagreements, but abuse and harassment is something police often (and do) respond to.
@Renevent42: Maybe it's more prevalent there. I think I've seen a public argument 3 or 4 times in my lifetime so I better not judge what I haven't seen =) My main point is that the sort of verbal abuse present in random sexual comments towards a stranger can be highly disepowering for some people...then if someone comes along with a "Step aside miss, I'll take care of the problem for you" it can be even MORE disempowering...so someone is walking down the street and instead of having one person making him/her feel like his/her feeling don't matter and that they are powerless to stop it, all of a sudden you have two...the asshole and the knight...not an improvement in any way...(again, if the guy is all hands or is stalking the girl and she looks scared, then I think people SHOULD act)
I think that kind mentality is dis-empowering on it's own and is more dangerous mindset for person to have. Empowerment comes from within...someone trying helping you doesn't make you weak. Actually, I think it's dangerous from all sides. If every time a person see a situation where they think someone else needs help they have to ask themselves "will helping that person dis-empower them?"...that's just silly...and frankly ridiculous.
And isn't ridiculous to assume that someone needs help every time they are in an uncomfortable situation? Just because I can help someone cross the road doesn't mean they can't do it themselves.
And isn't ridiculous to assume that someone needs help every time they are in an uncomfortable situation? Just because I can help someone cross the road doesn't mean they can't do it themselves.
Right, and even if someone did try to help me cross the road when I didn't need it that wouldn't make me all weak and dis-empowered...I'd just be like "yo man, I got this".
But that's really off the main point altogether...because the cop didn't stop to help an able bodied person cross the road, they put a stop to a woman being verbally abused by a man.
@Renevent42: Or they could, you know, ask if you needed help instead of jumping to it...that's all I'm saying.
@Renevent42: Or they could, you know, ask if you needed help instead of jumping to it...that's all I'm saying.
You can't control what other people do, only what you do and how you feel. People aren't mind readers, and sometimes they try to help even when it may not be needed. Doesn't make you weak, and if it does that's a personal empowerment problem and you can't put that on other's feet.
@Renevent42: I'm not sure what your objective is with this conversation, I asked airshocker why he thinks the women needed their help? If he replied "because I offered my help and they said yes" then that would be it. You pretty much just highjacked that and are turning it into something else. Yes, you can't control what other people do, but you can always try to make them see new points of view, and you agree with this otherwise you wouldn't be commenting right now.
I'm only opposed to the notion that some people have that everybody needs their help. Some people are just fine...I for one, would hate for someone to come running at me with "I'll protect you!" every time they saw a girl making unwanted comments towards me. It would be quite silly =P
Probably because he observed she was being verbally abused? And I didn't hijack anything, I merely commented at how silly your comment was and how it reminded me of that scene from White Men Can't Jump. You are also again mincing words...you downplay it on one hand (unwanted comments) but then other times call it harassment and abuse.
I agree, it would be silly for anyone to get involved if someone said you are having a bad hair day...but a creep following a woman down the street for 5 mins and saying nasty shit to her? I think it's more than reasonable for someone to help.
Also just because we are having a conversation, doesn't mean I think a viewpoint has merit.
@Renevent42: Fair enough. I think this back and forth of ours has become quite useless and potentially annoying to other people interested in participating in this discussion so I'm going to end it here if that's ok with you. Thank you for your time and have a good day =)
This video confirms what I said about men telling women why THEY are wrong for THEIR discomfort. The guy sickens me. He even says "feminists" like a dirty word.
EDIT: Did I properly convey how much this guy disgusts me? Because he does.
The great thing about being a cop is that I can go up to a guy who has just been extremely rude to a woman (like quite a few of the guys in this viral video were), tell them to shut the **** up, and see great satisfaction from the woman that somebody is trying to make the place a little bit more safe for them.
It has a fantastically sobering effect on guys at the bar scene, as well.
Moral of the story: Don't be a scumbag. Because there are cops that see it and can do something about it.
And what makes you think that those women need you to save them? Aren't they able to fend for themselves? Unless they're following her or being physically abusive and she's not being able to protect herself she doesn't need a man saving her from other men...that kind of attitude can sometimes be part of the problem. Some asshole decided to take it upon himself to catcall a woman with complete disregard to her wishes, then comes a cop who tells the guys off with complete disregard to her wishes...
It's not about saving anybody. It's about enforcing some level of civility. I don't need permission from anybody to do that.
@Renevent42: Maybe it's more prevalent there. I think I've seen a public argument 3 or 4 times in my lifetime so I better not judge what I haven't seen =) My main point is that the sort of verbal abuse present in random sexual comments towards a stranger can be highly disepowering for some people...then if someone comes along with a "Step aside miss, I'll take care of the problem for you" it can be even MORE disempowering...so someone is walking down the street and instead of having one person making him/her feel like his/her feeling don't matter and that they are powerless to stop it, all of a sudden you have two...the asshole and the knight...not an improvement in any way...(again, if the guy is all hands or is stalking the girl and she looks scared, then I think people SHOULD act)
I don't even talk to the woman most of the time, so you're just showing you don't have any accurate idea of what I was doing.
She's not even that attractive. I wouldn't waste my spit.
I know around here where I am, there are of lot prettier women and no one really pays attention to them (as in a mall).
@airshocker: Of course I don't have an accurate idea of what you were doing, that's why I asked =P I did, however, question how much of your involvement was about you wanting to help and not about yourself. If you had said something like "moral of the story: don't be a scumbag because everyone deserves as much respect and you want for yourself regardless of their gender" I would understand but what you said is akin to "don't be a scumbag because if I see you I'll chew your ass off"...that sounds more like you patting your own back than anything else, and now you say that you don't even bother talking to the person you are supposedly helping, so that doesn't help disprove my notion, but on the bright side I doubt you really care what I believe, and hey, even if you do it in order to feel better about yourself, that's not a crime either so keep calm and carry on, I guess.
@airshocker: Of course I don't have an accurate idea of what you were doing, that's why I asked =P I did, however, question how much of your involvement was about you wanting to help and not about yourself. If you had said something like "moral of the story: don't be a scumbag because everyone deserves as much respect and you want for yourself regardless of their gender" I would understand but what you said is akin to "don't be a scumbag because if I see you I'll chew your ass off"...that sounds more like you patting your own back than anything else, and now you say that you don't even bother talking to the person you are supposedly helping, so that doesn't help disprove my notion, but on the bright side I doubt you really care what I believe, and hey, even if you do it in order to feel better about yourself, that's not a crime either so keep calm and carry on, I guess.
I'll chew your ass off because you should be treating everybody with respect regardless of their gender.
There's no reason to talk to the woman unless there has actually been some type of crime committed. Me talking to a woman after I help her would just make it seem like I'm trying to pat myself on the back, when in actuality I don't care for public recognition. I know what's right and what's wrong and I act accordingly.
@airshocker: If that is your belief then go out there and do the best you can (which I assume it's what you're already doing) =)
Were in the **** do you guys keep finding these old ass threads? How hard is it to just make a new one?
Eh, if you're a new user and you see page upon page of threads, it's not hard to find old ones you would be able to comment in... some people just don't seem to understand what "3 months 27 days ago" means.
Were in the **** do you guys keep finding these old ass threads? How hard is it to just make a new one?
Eh, if you're a new user and you see page upon page of threads, it's not hard to find old ones you would be able to comment in... some people just don't seem to understand what "3 months 27 days ago" means.
Its a bot.
See: https://www.youtube.com/watchv=b1XGPvbWn0A&google_comment_id=z12uyhfi0sn4fnpzh04cj1bitvfezlry1d4
I know some of the men were being offensive but don't some women also say hi or smile to men? Why is it wrong for men to do it but not women? That sounds sexest.
Again, I know some of the men in the video were creeps, but about half of them consisted of "god bless" and "hi have a nice day." What is so offensive about this? I've had women say "hi" to me or or smile at me my friends as well; but I don't consider this sexual harassment. Why did the lady in "10 Hours of Walking In NYC As a Woman " video get so offended when men said hi to her and smiled to her? Thoughts?
Unsolicited attention isn't necessarily harassment but can feel like it to the person experiencing it. Especially if that attention borders on offensive or inappropriate behaviour that makes them feel unsafe and uncomfortable. That being said I'm not sure the problem is quite as bad as the video implies - NYC is a very populous city, walking around the streets for 10 hours could put you in close proximity to thousands of individual men, if 100 give you unwanted attention then that may seem like a large amount but it's still only a small percentage of men you've walked past. Nor does it account for people who are smiling or saying hi just to be friendly.
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