A different girl problem. PLEASE give me advice :(

okay, so me and this girl.. well, we've been talking for quite a while now. its quite obvious that we're both very interested in eachother. In fact, we have pretty much stated our love for eachother already.

we have made out once before, but it was at a party. we havent talked much about it afterwards, but as i said before.. we're both pretty much ready to start a relationship any time now.

so, this is my problem.. today, we were talking as always, on msn.. and we started talking about her ex boyfriend. then i asked her straight out and she told me that, well, shes not a virgin.

now, we have not talked any more about it.. but it hit me real bad. i dont know, i just feel like the fact that shes not a virgin ruins a lot. i mean, i wont be her first.. we're both 16 and we won't get to share this experience together. we won't go through it for the first time together. shes already been there, done that.

i mean, i just.. dont want her to have lost her virginity yet. i wanted her to be a virgin. now its like she is not the woman of my dreams anymore. i know its bad to blame her for the past and all that, but argh.. this is just so hard for me. i hope someone will understand.

thanks.

honestly dude, you dont want to take her virginity. its not fun. she'll be in pain, the bleeding.... the bleeding... you dont want it man, blessing in disguise. and dont let that ruin your relationship, especially as you get older, you should just assume she's had experience.

i know it must be hard to take that in, but .. you really have no choice but to get over it. you love this girl, dont let this get in the way. in 3-4 years you'll look back and laugh at the fact you even cared.

Either she's good enough without being "the girl of your dreams", or she isn't and then you can move on. Simple.

okay, so me and this girl.. well, we've been talking for quite a while now. its quite obvious that we're both very interested in eachother. In fact, we have pretty much stated our love for eachother already.

we have made out once before, but it was at a party. we havent talked much about it afterwards, but as i said before.. we're both pretty much ready to start a relationship any time now.

so, this is my problem.. today, we were talking as always, on msn.. and we started talking about her ex boyfriend. then i asked her straight out and she told me that, well, shes not a virgin.

now, we have not talked any more about it.. but it hit me real bad. i dont know, i just feel like the fact that shes not a virgin ruins a lot. i mean, i wont be her first.. we're both 16 and we won't get to share this experience together. we won't go through it for the first time together. shes already been there, done that.

i mean, i just.. dont want her to have lost her virginity yet. i wanted her to be a virgin. now its like she is not the woman of my dreams anymore. i know its bad to blame her for the past and all that, but argh.. this is just so hard for me. i hope someone will understand.

thanks.

escapeoftheape

If you're questioning your feelings because of that, I'm not sure you're ready for a relationship yet.metallica_fan42

[QUOTE="metallica_fan42"]If you're questioning your feelings because of that, I'm not sure you're ready for a relationship yet.escapeoftheape

If you're not ready to have sex and she doesn't understand that, then to hell with her, amirite? Plenty more virgin fish in the sea.

If you're not ready to have sex and she doesn't understand that, then to hell with her, amirite? Plenty more virgin fish in the sea.

Scarebaby

[QUOTE="Scarebaby"]

If you're not ready to have sex and she doesn't understand that, then to hell with her, amirite? Plenty more virgin fish in the sea.

escapeoftheape

[QUOTE="metallica_fan42"]If you're questioning your feelings because of that, I'm not sure you're ready for a relationship yet.escapeoftheape

Bah, spastic keyboard.

[QUOTE="Scarebaby"]

If you're not ready to have sex and she doesn't understand that, then to hell with her, amirite? Plenty more virgin fish in the sea.

escapeoftheape

You could always run out and lay some random girl if it's that important to you. I think it's all in your head though, not in your flesh. Can't you talk to the girl in question about this?

boo hoo, a girl had sex. All that means is that when you first do it, she'll be a bit better than you. How can you "blame her" for having sex? pis3rch

Why should it matter she had a life before you, don'tmournand whine don't let something good slip because of something pointless. Do the right thing let it go.

So what? You like this girl, right? Well she isn't becoming any more of a virgin by waiting. Go for it, and if you guys really have something, your first time together will be special whether or not she's a virgin.

there's nothing you can do about it now, so there's no point in dwelling on it. obviously she likes YOU now, and that's all that matters. besides, losing your virginity is probably not going to be as "magical" as you think it is, just saying.

okay, so me and this girl.. well, we've been talking for quite a while now. its quite obvious that we're both very interested in eachother. In fact, we have pretty much stated our love for eachother already.

we have made out once before, but it was at a party. we havent talked much about it afterwards, but as i said before.. we're both pretty much ready to start a relationship any time now.

so, this is my problem.. today, we were talking as always, on msn.. and we started talking about her ex boyfriend. then i asked her straight out and she told me that, well, shes not a virgin.

now, we have not talked any more about it.. but it hit me real bad. i dont know, i just feel like the fact that shes not a virgin ruins a lot. i mean, i wont be her first.. we're both 16 and we won't get to share this experience together. we won't go through it for the first time together. shes already been there, done that.

i mean, i just.. dont want her to have lost her virginity yet. i wanted her to be a virgin. now its like she is not the woman of my dreams anymore. i know its bad to blame her for the past and all that, but argh.. this is just so hard for me. i hope someone will understand.

thanks.

escapeoftheape

sigh, wow, i finally meet a person my age that agrees with that being a virgin at our age is fine..... most are so quick to get rid of it as if it were a burden, yet when u lose it, u\ll never have it back

give it some time and thought, and if she is really worth it, then go ahead, but only if she really is..... my best friend has the same problem

She might be your first "real" "sex mate". Think of it as that.

okay, so me and this girl.. well, we've been talking for quite a while now. its quite obvious that we're both very interested in eachother. In fact, we have pretty much stated our love for eachother already.

we have made out once before, but it was at a party. we havent talked much about it afterwards, but as i said before.. we're both pretty much ready to start a relationship any time now.

so, this is my problem.. today, we were talking as always, on msn.. and we started talking about her ex boyfriend. then i asked her straight out and she told me that, well, shes not a virgin.

now, we have not talked any more about it.. but it hit me real bad. i dont know, i just feel like the fact that shes not a virgin ruins a lot. i mean, i wont be her first.. we're both 16 and we won't get to share this experience together. we won't go through it for the first time together. shes already been there, done that.

i mean, i just.. dont want her to have lost her virginity yet. i wanted her to be a virgin. now its like she is not the woman of my dreams anymore. i know its bad to blame her for the past and all that, but argh.. this is just so hard for me. i hope someone will understand.

thanks.

escapeoftheape

Just stay away from that stuff, You can have Relationship without that. I'm sure if you loved her and she loved you, you wouldn't need to turn it into a "Sexual Relationship". Not to begin on a rant or anything but, it's bet if you save things like that for Marriage, to show your love for each other.

man, you don't need to worry if you are the first one to have sex with her or not, you just need to be the best for her.

my girlfriend wasn't virgin too when we started our relationship, but i didn't care, i just did what i needed to do. and she's happy by my side, because i'm the best for her

ps: i was virgin before being her boyfriend

this is just so hardescapeoftheape

Well this really isn't a girl problem. It has more to do with how you view her and your ideal of a relationship

I don't think this is a problem at all

boo hoo, a girl had sex. All that means is that when you first do it, she'll be a bit better than you. How can you "blame her" for having sex? pis3rch

Doesn't mean that at all. I'm much older and have had sex with women who are attractive who obviously have had more than one intimate relationship in their lives, who are not good at all at sex. Having lots of sex has nothing to do with how good you are. IN fact most people are horrible at sex, that is why so many people are so able to have it so readily with people they barely know, because no one cares how bad the other is as long as they get theirs.

Basically being good at sex means you care about the other person involved in the situation. Love or not, raunchy sex or slow and gentle. Most people only care about themselves ESPECIALLY 16 year olds. Find me a 16 year old that cares about anyone else but themselves and I'll find you a pig that can fly. There are plenty of 16 year olds that have sex, as disturbing as that is to me as a 16 year old is still a kid in my opinion. There are no 16 year olds that are good at sex, ANYWHERE.

But to get back to the topic, don't ask for love advice from people on the Gamespot forums. Figure it out yourself buddy.

[QUOTE="escapeoftheape"][QUOTE="metallica_fan42"]If you're questioning your feelings because of that, I'm not sure you're ready for a relationship yet.jalexbrown

Popping cherries ain't all it's cracked up to be. The relationship is what's important. If she's worth your time, she should be blowing your mind with conversation, regardless of her viginity status. Does she blow your mind?

And like a previous poster said, a girls first time is some messy, ****ed up ****. It's not like the movies.

Maybe if you beat her ex up, you can take it back. You just have to find out where he hides it first. ;)

Oh get over it. Stop worrying about what these bloody conservatives might think and go out with her. Life is too damn short to worry about this garbage. Go out together and have some fun. Christ, you'll look back on these years and wish you had if you dont.

okay, so me and this girl.. well, we've been talking for quite a while now. its quite obvious that we're both very interested in eachother. In fact, we have pretty much stated our love for eachother already.

we have made out once before, but it was at a party. we havent talked much about it afterwards, but as i said before.. we're both pretty much ready to start a relationship any time now.

so, this is my problem.. today, we were talking as always, on msn.. and we started talking about her ex boyfriend. then i asked her straight out and she told me that, well, shes not a virgin.

now, we have not talked any more about it.. but it hit me real bad. i dont know, i just feel like the fact that shes not a virgin ruins a lot. i mean, i wont be her first.. we're both 16 and we won't get to share this experience together. we won't go through it for the first time together. shes already been there, done that.

i mean, i just.. dont want her to have lost her virginity yet. i wanted her to be a virgin. now its like she is not the woman of my dreams anymore. i know its bad to blame her for the past and all that, but argh.. this is just so hard for me. i hope someone will understand.

thanks.

escapeoftheape

She might be keeping other secrets, too. I would pre-emptively break up with her.