@zeroyaoi said: Byshop isn't advocating for parents public shaming their kids.
Yeah, he isn't for public shaming kids as it's not good parenting
Crazy Feminist Moms embarrasses kids on Facebook
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@Byshop said:
@still_vicious said:
@Byshop said:
@still_vicious said:
You basically just agreed with everything i said in a long worded way.
I think you want really badly to believe that bullying is bad and you want to disagree with me for that reason.
But you literally support what I've said in that bullies are more successful. Underlined where you've backed me up.
Remember, your kids are better as bullies.
Pardon me if I don't change my entire parenting philosophy because a random forum user on the internet misunderstood something he read. As I said, the whole point of the study wasn't "bullying = good", it was that "what's wrong with bullies isn't what we thought it was, so let's change our approach to how we deal with them".
-Byshop
Love it when personal attacks start. I take it as a sign that I'm right.
My point is that bullies are more successful in life. Bullying is a way pecking order is determined, and I'd rather my kids be on top.
What personal attack? You misunderstood the point of the study because you read a second hand reference to it in a column on an news site. I linked you to the original article, but if you're just going to cherry pick the lines that you feel support your position while ignoring the conclusion and purpose of the study then feel free to believe what you choose, but don't expect me or anyone else to go along with it. I have no idea what part of:
“The results do not, by any means, suggest that bullying is ‘ok’ because it may have genetic explanations. Research consistently demonstrates negative implications of bullying in both the short- and long-term, and it should not be acceptable in our schools,” says SFU criminologist Jennifer Wong, lead researcher on the study. “However, this information is useful because it provides us with new options for addressing bullying behaviour.”
...is unclear to you. Maybe you're just deliberately being contrary. The stuff you said about "more successful in life and will make more money" is something you made up based on what you read. Higher social statusand greater success sexually in High School doesn't scream most adults as "will succeed in life". On the contrary, I picture Al Bundy from Married with Children and think "peaked in High School".
-Byshop
reread what you wrote....
I'm not cherry picking lines, I'm pointing out the results or conclusion. Just because you don't like it doesn't make it less true.
Here's a lesson in science; it doesn't matter what you set out to prove, if you discover something else along the way that can be scientifically proven, then that idea is a valid conclusion. The study obviously set out to help deal with bullying, but along the way it found out that bullying had the purpose of creating a pecking order, and that bullies are more successful.
It's interesting that you use anecdotal evidence from a fictional show, but here's some science to bring you back the fun of reality. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/03/090309171922.htm popular kids, which includes bullies, make make more money, as much as people like to believe that people were popular in HS then failed in life, the opposite is true in reality.
@zeroyaoi said:
Byshop isn't advocating for parents public shaming their kids.
Yeah, parenting isn't about making it "you against them" because that's how you get kids to grow up wanting to rebel against you.
@pook99 said:
Keeping your kid from being a bully is good parenting, disciplining your child on the internet for the world to see is abyssmal parenting and bordering on child abuse.
I have been a middle school teacher for 14 years, I have an incredible record of stopping bullying issues in my school, and I can tell you the way to stop bullying is to get to know bullies, figure out why they are bullying, and work on correcting those issues. Positive reinforcement and boosting self-esteem go a long way in preventing bullying, public humiliation and shame only lead to anger and self-loathing which typically just leads to more bullying. That parent should be ashamed of herself.
Yeah, the study that vicious is (at this point likely deliberately) misinterpreting is about understanding the "why" of bullying and how to better address it. It might sound a bit hyperbolic, but what the mom did could really be interpreted as bullying itself. Public humiliation is way over the top, just as constantly berating your kid would be or calling them stupid or otherwise insulting them.
One of the ways the study suggested was monitored competitive activities as a way to help children establish social order without the detrimental effects of bullying.
-Byshop
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