I have a friend who's girlfriend was like that. As a test, he wasn't going to ever talk to her first for a while, and see how long it took for her to text or call him. They didn't talk for three days. They broke up.
1. Don't bring up past relationships when talking with her 2. It's not a big deal. She could just be that kind of person who isn't into texting. 3. Maybe she's trying to see how much you like her by making you do all the work 4. Lists are great. Try one.
Sorry to put any dampener on the situation.. but thats a bad sign? Communication is a huge factor in a relationship and she should be willing just as much as you are
Just not text or call her for a day or two and see what she does. If she doesn't even bother to check up on you move on. You shouldn't be starting every single convo. A simple hello from her would suffice.
that is actually what happens to me right now with my gf. :P i dont mind but like sometimes it would be nice if she would initiate the conversation now and then. the only time she actually texts me is when i dont text her for a while. :P
I thought about this briefly. Is your girlriend typically an outgoing person? Does she strike up conversations with strangers in bars/clubs/the mall? If not, then maybe she's just a shy person. I've gone out with a couple girls who weren't chatty, at least not until they got to know someone well. On the other hand, if she is a regular socialite, and she never initiates talking to you, then either she's being manipulative, or she just doesn't care very much. Or it could be something else entirely; people are complex.
My last girlfriend, I always initiated contact. Some women like to be controlled. Those that do, you probably have to be the one that does everything. My ex loved being controlled...a lot...
No usaully she is the one to call or text first...I just recently started doing the same because she likes it. It makes her happy if I text first every once in awhile...
My ex-girlfriends never did such a thing. However, one of my closest friends is like that, unless she's having a problem with her partner, then I get the problem dumped onto my feet.
It should really be 50/50. But for a guy it is normal sometimes for it be to 70/30. I know it's hard but you should just not text her until she starts texting you.
Just not text or call her for a day or two and see what she does. If she doesn't even bother to check up on you move on. You shouldn't be starting every single convo. A simple hello from her would suffice.
kidsmelly
Well she tells me that she doesn't want to come off as a clingy girlfriend. She knows I hate that, and she tells me that she feels like I'll get annoyed or bothered if she sends me messages and whatnot so I guess she leaves it up to me to talk to her.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. If you're really curious stop initiating convos with her and see what happens. The more clingy you are the less interested she'll likely be. She probably doesn't call you because she knows you'll call or text her. Not all females are like this, but from the sounds of it, your is. After a few days she'llshould get curious and maybe even worried as to why you've stopped contacting her, if not then you havea problem. I'm not saying this is the right thing to do, but its a good way to find out whats up. I used to never call my GF (which I don't recommend doing), which in turn had her calling me every day.
[QUOTE="NetYankEagle"]you are not the only one i am currently having that problem and sometimes it pisses me off when she aks if im mad because i didnt txt her the whole day..i always respond "texting works both ways"mr-sheep
Dude yesterday, I tried something with her, I didn't talk to her the entire day and then when I finally did later on in at night, she tells me she didn't text me because she thinks she'll be disturbing me if I'm doing something -_- Geeeez it ain't like imma blow her off if I'm in the middle of something.
Yeah that's what mine says too; she's only called me a couple times out of the blue. I usually do most of the initiating of conversations.
I have a friend who's girlfriend was like that. As a test, he wasn't going to ever talk to her first for a while, and see how long it took for her to text or call him. They didn't talk for three days. They broke up.criinok
I've talked to her about it and she says that it's completely normal for girls to do what she's doing.mr-sheep
She doesn't want to admit that she's doing something wrong. For some reason, many people are like that to their partners.
No, she should be at least trying to initiate conversation just as much as you do. Honestly, its childish for her to think that only the male has to get conversations going.
BUT, don't make this a bigger deal than it really is. There doesn't need to be a fight.
Judging by your explanation though, I can bet that you're pretty mature already.
I'm almost always the convo initiator when I talk to my boyfriend, what she's doing doesn't sound normal at all. She either has some huge hangup on making the guy do things because she wants to feel desired, or she's just crazy.
If a girl does that, that usually means you're not that interesting, believe me. I have loads of girls that do that, then whine why I don't text :lol: Just a word of advice: Don't let it become a one-way street. If she can't be bothered, walk away.
Some girls I talk to never text me first unless they want todo something. Other text me every other hour trying to talk. I guess there are two ends of the spectrum.
If a girl does that, that usually means you're not that interesting, believe me. I have loads of girls that do that, then whine why I don't text :lol: Just a word of advice: Don't let it become a one-way street. If she can't be bothered, walk away.Daavpuke
That makes little sense to me. Why would a girl become your girlfriend if you are not that interesting? And if your female friends do that, why do they then whine when you treat them with their own medicine?
[QUOTE="Hexagon_777"] And if your female friends do that, why do they then whine when you treat them with their own medicine?RazerBlade13
Because of reasons seemingly beyond the capacity of the male mind. That or they don't believe in fairness among the sexes.They don't? If that's the case, my kitchen is always in need of one of those. Maybe then they will believe in equality again? :o
Uhhhh no it's not normal. :? I initiate convos a lot with my bf but he does too. It is about 50/50 for us and it is about the same for all the other couples I know.
astrozombie37
From my experience I say this is the most accurate especially at the beginning of any relationships. It should even out abit as the relationship progress
I come to you with a question, I've been going out with my girlfriend for a little bit now, she's great and all but something keeps getting to me about her. She barely ever texts me first to start a conversation since we started going out. I always initiate conversations with her, I always have to call her up or text her first for a conversation to pop up. The only time she'd only contact me first hand is if we're in a fight, only then will she come to me to talk if I'm not saying anything. It would be nice to have her text me or call me first once in a while, but I guess I can live with things as it is since our phone calls and SMS conversations go by great and without a hitch. Hell I just got off like a near four hour phone call with her just now.
I've talked to her about it and she says that it's completely normal for girls to do what she's doing. I tell her no and that nearly every other girl I've been with either than her has always texted or called me first to initiate conversations. But anyways, to you guys or girls out here on OT, is it normal for the guy to do all the initiating?!?! Oh and she specifically told me to go on here to ask you guys, she thinks she's in the right so I'll be showing her your responses later on :D
Thanks for the response if you do respond haha.
mr-sheep
No dude. I'm sorry, but you're not doing too hot here. Most normal, working relationships have both parties equally initiating convos. You are showing her you are needy, and she is probably not liking it too much. If you stopped initiating all the time, either she'll initiate, or she'll do the right thing and set things straight. She's not that interested in you.
Think of it as dancing.A man has always got to lead,but the woman helps out too. So it gotta be 50/50.My gf we been going out for 11 months,we always start a conversation automatically and never really realize it :P
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