I Need Help (Parents Issue)

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HalfLifer248

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#1 HalfLifer248
Member since 2005 • 913 Posts

Well I just moved to New York city with my dad cause my parents split up, my dad yells at me always treats me like crap, he doesnt want me to go and visit my mom, he said i can only visit her in detroit every 8 months, and i miss her.

Me and him always fight, he never stops bothering me. I can't be on my cell phone without him yelling at me and looking thru my phone, i love new york, but im only 15 and i can't take living alone with him.

What should i do? I wanna go back to detroit and live with my mom. But he won't let me.

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Taegukki

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#2 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts

Well I just moved to New York city with my dad cause my parents split up, my dad yells at me always treats me like crap, he doesnt want me to go and visit my mom, he said i can only visit her in detroit every 8 months, and i miss her.

Me and him always fight, he never stops bothering me. I can't be on my cell phone without him yelling at me and looking thru my phone, i love new york, but im only 15 and i can't take living alone with him.

What should i do?

HalfLifer248

Talk to him. Tell him that if he doesnt treat you better youll go and live with your mother.

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big_old_tom

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#3 big_old_tom
Member since 2006 • 6957 Posts
who's choice was it for you to move there? was it your's or your dad's? because if your parents get divorced, at your age, usually the child is allowed to decide who he wants to live with.
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HalfLifer248

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#4 HalfLifer248
Member since 2005 • 913 Posts
No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.
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Bill900

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#5 Bill900
Member since 2007 • 4530 Posts
go to court?
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Taegukki

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#6 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts

No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.HalfLifer248

What the hell is your sisters problem?

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dholmes19

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#7 dholmes19
Member since 2006 • 1805 Posts

sounds like there is more issues than just your dad going on here.

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HalfLifer248

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#8 HalfLifer248
Member since 2005 • 913 Posts

[QUOTE="HalfLifer248"]No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.Taegukki

What the hell is your sisters problem?

well since my parents split up, shes sorta taken my dads side.

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Taegukki

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#9 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts
[QUOTE="Taegukki"]

[QUOTE="HalfLifer248"]No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.HalfLifer248

What the hell is your sisters problem?

well since my parents split up, shes sorta taken my dads side.

Then why dont you trade places.

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Fortier

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#10 Fortier
Member since 2004 • 7728 Posts
[QUOTE="Taegukki"]

[QUOTE="HalfLifer248"]No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.HalfLifer248

What the hell is your sisters problem?

well since my parents split up, shes sorta taken my dads side.

Then why isn't she the one in NY?

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HalfLifer248

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#11 HalfLifer248
Member since 2005 • 913 Posts
because she is married and has a kid.
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Whicker89

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#12 Whicker89
Member since 2004 • 18919 Posts
Well it must be hard on your father understand whats happened to him, his marrage has gone to hell his kids disrespect him, try being a bit more understanding
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jrhawk42

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#13 jrhawk42
Member since 2003 • 12764 Posts
sounds to me like your family, or you are completely messed up. anyway I'd suggest cutting yourself away from them as much as possible. Get a part time job, and spend as much time out of the house as possible.
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dholmes19

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#14 dholmes19
Member since 2006 • 1805 Posts
yeah, getting out of the house more and getting a job would greatly help
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Taegukki

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#15 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts

because she is married and has a kid. HalfLifer248

Is she living with your mum?

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HalfLifer248

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#16 HalfLifer248
Member since 2005 • 913 Posts
No i have 3 sisters 2 are married and live with thier husbands, my little sister lives with my mom and i live with my dad, but i hate living here. i love michigan i kno everything there.
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Taegukki

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#17 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts

No i have 3 sisters 2 are married and live with thier husbands, my little sister lives with my mom and i live with my dad, but i hate living here. i love michigan i kno everything there.HalfLifer248

So the sister that hates you isnt living with your mother? Then move there dude! What can they really do anyway. Its better than living with an abusive father.

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X360PS3AMD05

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#18 X360PS3AMD05
Member since 2005 • 36320 Posts
Well it sucks for you, just wait until you're 18 and move out.
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anandram

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#19 anandram
Member since 2007 • 1537 Posts
What exactly is the issue here? You say you are moving back to chicago...and there you have it. Speak to your mum and tell her you want to live with her, she'll sort all the court crap out and you'l be home in no time buddy. :) Speak to your mum NOW. Stop procrastinating on a website forum!! :?
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anandram

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#20 anandram
Member since 2007 • 1537 Posts

Well it sucks for you, just wait until you're 18 and move out.X360PS3AMD05

Your an insensitive soul arent you? Hate to have you as a friend :)

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Taegukki

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#21 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts
What exactly is the issue here? You say you are moving back to chicago...and there you have it. Speak to your mum and tell her you want to live with her, she'll sort all the court crap out and you'l be home in no time buddy. :) Speak to your mum NOW. Stop procrastinating on a website forum!! :?anandram

Detroit is in Michigan :wink:
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X360PS3AMD05

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#22 X360PS3AMD05
Member since 2005 • 36320 Posts

[QUOTE="X360PS3AMD05"]Well it sucks for you, just wait until you're 18 and move out.anandram

Your an insensitive soul arent you? Hate to have you as a friend :)

No i'm not, it's just i don't see how he can get out of the situation.
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F-14Bombcat

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#23 F-14Bombcat
Member since 2007 • 413 Posts

No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.HalfLifer248

Please tell me that you didn't curse at your father. If that is the case, then no wonder he is upset and angry. Parents want respect from their children. You should always respect your parents no matter what. Has he physically hurt you? Has he violently threatened you? If the answer is no, then he could be doing a lot worse. Try going 30 days saying "yes sir" "sorry sir" and "thank you". Do what he asks when you are told, and do not talk back to him. I learned this the hard way that if you want your parents to treat you with respect, it is up to YOU to start it.

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muthsera666

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#24 muthsera666
Member since 2005 • 13271 Posts

[QUOTE="HalfLifer248"]No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.F-14Bombcat

Please tell me that you didn't curse at your father. If that is the case, then no wonder he is upset and angry. Parents want respect from their children. You should always respect your parents no matter what. Has he physically hurt you? Has he violently threatened you? If the answer is no, then he could be doing a lot worse. Try going 30 days saying "yes sir" "sorry sir" and "thank you". Do what he asks when you are told, and do not talk back to him. I learned this the hard way that if you want your parents to treat you with respect, it is up to YOU to start it.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and disagree. Parents are not worthy of respect just because they had sex and produced offspring. They are human just like every other human (heh). I do not believe in respecting someone merely because they happen to be in some certain position. I respect people who deserve it.

Physical abuse, depending upon the severity, can heal with time. Emotional abuse can affect one for the rest of his life.

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Taegukki

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#25 Taegukki
Member since 2005 • 13241 Posts
[QUOTE="F-14Bombcat"]

[QUOTE="HalfLifer248"]No, it wasn't my choice, my sister told me she would ruin my life if i stayed in detroit. When ever i tell him im getting the eff out new york and back to detroit he always says good its not my **** problem.muthsera666

Please tell me that you didn't curse at your father. If that is the case, then no wonder he is upset and angry. Parents want respect from their children. You should always respect your parents no matter what. Has he physically hurt you? Has he violently threatened you? If the answer is no, then he could be doing a lot worse. Try going 30 days saying "yes sir" "sorry sir" and "thank you". Do what he asks when you are told, and do not talk back to him. I learned this the hard way that if you want your parents to treat you with respect, it is up to YOU to start it.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and disagree. Parents are not worthy of respect just because they had sex and produced offspring. They are human just like every other human (heh). I do not believe in respecting someone merely because they happen to be in some certain position. I respect people who deserve it.

Physical abuse, depending upon the severity, can heal with time. Emotional abuse can affect one for the rest of his life.

I completely agree. I do not respect people just because of their position, they have to earn it.

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F-14Bombcat

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#26 F-14Bombcat
Member since 2007 • 413 Posts

I'm going to go out on a limb here and disagree. Parents are not worthy of respect just because they had sex and produced offspring. They are human just like every other human (heh). I do not believe in respecting someone merely because they happen to be in some certain position. I respect people who deserve it.

Physical abuse, depending upon the severity, can heal with time. Emotional abuse can affect one for the rest of his life.

muthsera666

I guess I have that mind frame because I came from an old fashioned household that when you didn't respect your parents, then there was a belt with your name on it. If you cursed at your parents, I did not even want to try:?. I guess I am lucky in the aspect that I had wonderful parents who taught me respect and discipline, and how to succeed in life. Parents stuck with you for years, when they could of just gave you away, but they didn't. They deserve respect for putting up with your crud, and one day when you finally have children, then I hope you will understand.

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muthsera666

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#27 muthsera666
Member since 2005 • 13271 Posts
[QUOTE="muthsera666"]

I'm going to go out on a limb here and disagree. Parents are not worthy of respect just because they had sex and produced offspring. They are human just like every other human (heh). I do not believe in respecting someone merely because they happen to be in some certain position. I respect people who deserve it.

Physical abuse, depending upon the severity, can heal with time. Emotional abuse can affect one for the rest of his life.

F-14Bombcat

I guess I have that mind frame because I came from an old fashioned household that when you didn't respect your parents, then there was a belt with your name on it. If you cursed at your parents, I did not even want to try:?. I guess I am lucky in the aspect that I had wonderful parents who taught me respect and discipline, and how to succeed in life. Parents stuck with you for years, when they could of just gave you away, but they didn't. They deserve respect for putting up with your crud, and one day when you finally have children, then I hope you will understand.

Well, hey now. I'm not saying that the people who raise you aren't worthy of respect. The act of producing offspring just doesn't warrent any special accolades. I was disciplined as a child if I stepped out of line. The belt, the wooden paddle. I love my parents, and I don't want anything bad to happen to them. I wish everyone has as good of parents as I did. However, I realize that not everyone does. I'm 20, and I'm still somewhat scared to smart off to my mother. My parents did every thing they could for me. I never went hungry, even through the lean years. Just to give you an idea, my college cost for two semesters is more than what both my parents make in the course of an entire year.

My parents definitely deserve and get my respect. I do understand and I don't need children to do so. In fact, I'm not sure I want children because I'm afraid that I can't be as good of a father/parent as mine.

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Guiltfeeder566

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#28 Guiltfeeder566
Member since 2005 • 10068 Posts
[QUOTE="HalfLifer248"]

Well I just moved to New York city with my dad cause my parents split up, my dad yells at me always treats me like crap, he doesnt want me to go and visit my mom, he said i can only visit her in detroit every 8 months, and i miss her.

Me and him always fight, he never stops bothering me. I can't be on my cell phone without him yelling at me and looking thru my phone, i love new york, but im only 15 and i can't take living alone with him.

What should i do?

Taegukki

Talk to him. Tell him that if he doesnt treat you better youll go and live with your mother.

Sounds like a plan to me.

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siberian142

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#29 siberian142
Member since 2007 • 7774 Posts

Well I just moved to New York city with my dad cause my parents split up, my dad yells at me always treats me like crap, he doesnt want me to go and visit my mom, he said i can only visit her in detroit every 8 months, and i miss her.

Me and him always fight, he never stops bothering me. I can't be on my cell phone without him yelling at me and looking thru my phone, i love new york, but im only 15 and i can't take living alone with him.

What should i do? I wanna go back to detroit and live with my mom. But he won't let me.

HalfLifer248

Ask him why he yells at you.Sit down with him and talk about how you want to visit your mom more and tell him he isn't the only parent who is in this position.

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Godly_Cure

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#30 Godly_Cure
Member since 2007 • 4293 Posts

Go live with your mom. Your sister isn't important. If she's concerned she can transplant her family to NY. Though I've never heard of a parent not getting visitation at least.