My future terrifies me.

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IronBeaver

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#1 IronBeaver
Member since 2009 • 1986 Posts

Okay. So here is where I am at- I am about to graduate from a state university with a BA in history. Right now I am leaning towards law school for environmental law because 1. environmental issues are a passion 2. it interests me. But it terrifies me. It can financially wreck you and doesn't guarantee a paycheck like it used to.

At the same time, I have a fantasy of becoming a musician, but obviously, REAL success in that is not realistic. And only recently have I started getting a musicians "career" (and i use that term lightly) going. I have started playing consistantly with one person and gigs are on the horizon.

 

Here is the wild card: In my last few years of highschool, I "woke up", and started taking school much more seriously as a path to success. I started taking classes with the kids who are in ivy league schools now, and I feel I am staring at the glass ceiling. I have this desire for success, money, and influence, and either of my paths do not guarantee that, but the alternative to not trying is staying at my dead end (though not "bad") college kid job.

I feel like I need to prove something to myself and the world. I have never felt recognized for successes and I am afraid that lashing out and going gung ho in any direction will just lead to more dissapointment.

OT, HALP.

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Fightingfan

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#2 Fightingfan
Member since 2010 • 38011 Posts

I think you're suffering from the western asymptote syndrome. Stop comparing yourself to other, and stop trying to "one up", or wanting to one up everyone else. Just be you.

Competing with Ivy league students shouldn't even be an issue; I have Ivy professor who have no form of basic foundation of common sense. I honestly had to explain what fiat currency was to a professor who has multiple master degrees.

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LostProphetFLCL

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#3 LostProphetFLCL
Member since 2006 • 18526 Posts

I hear ya TC. Things really suck now.

I am stuck at a job I hate. Thanks to this whole mandation system I don't feel I can go back to college untill I get a new job (as they can force me to stay for a second shift and if I don't I lose my job).

On top of this I am not even sure STILL what I want to go back for. I have my heart set on making it in music regardless of what I go to school for, but I figure I should get an easy degree to be financially stable while I pursue music.

Thing is these days a college degree doesn't gaurantee you **** so college in itself is terrifying to me because I don't want to end up with a huge debt (which I have managed to stay debt free so far which I love) and no real job to pay it off.

TC I think the key here is to not be disappointed if you don't make it filthy rich. If you can live comfortably you have won at life IMO. These days just being able to keep up on bills is a major victory.

So yeah, don't worry about being uber successful, just worry about paying the bills.

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chaoscougar1

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#4 chaoscougar1
Member since 2005 • 37603 Posts

I think you're suffering from the western asymptote syndrome. Stop comparing yourself to other, and stop trying to "one up", or wanting to one up everyone else. Just be you.

Competing with Ivy league students shouldn't even be an issue; I have Ivy professor who have no form of basic foundation of common sense. I honestly had to explain what fiat currency was to a professor who has multiple master degrees.

Fightingfan
That is the best advice I have ever seen you give
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MakeMeaSammitch

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#5 MakeMeaSammitch
Member since 2012 • 4889 Posts

god dammit wars ma sammitch!!!

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IronBeaver

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#6 IronBeaver
Member since 2009 • 1986 Posts

god dammit wars ma sammitch!!!

MakeMeaSammitch

probably hanging with the grip i need to get.

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slipknot0129

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#7 slipknot0129
Member since 2008 • 5832 Posts

You either go all the way with your goal of going to law school or you settle for something less. Take the blue pill or the red. 

As for me, ive decided to go all the way with my goal of going to law school. I could settle with having an office job or something but I know the risk will be worth it if I go all the way with law school. 

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-Renegade

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#9 -Renegade
Member since 2007 • 8340 Posts

Okay. So here is where I am at- I am about to graduate from a state university with a BA in history. Right now I am leaning towards law school for environmental law because 1. environmental issues are a passion 2. it interests me. But it terrifies me. It can financially wreck you and doesn't guarantee a paycheck like it used to.

At the same time, I have a fantasy of becoming a musician, but obviously, REAL success in that is not realistic. And only recently have I started getting a musicians "career" (and i use that term lightly) going. I have started playing consistantly with one person and gigs are on the horizon.

 

Here is the wild card: In my last few years of highschool, I "woke up", and started taking school much more seriously as a path to success. I started taking classes with the kids who are in ivy league schools now, and I feel I am staring at the glass ceiling. I have this desire for success, money, and influence, and either of my paths do not guarantee that, but the alternative to not trying is staying at my dead end (though not "bad") college kid job.

I feel like I need to prove something to myself and the world. I have never felt recognized for successes and I am afraid that lashing out and going gung ho in any direction will just lead to more dissapointment.

OT, HALP.

IronBeaver

just do them both. i know people who work a day job and play music on the side/weekends.

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junglist101

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#10 junglist101
Member since 2007 • 5517 Posts

No one ever said the road to success would be easy.  In fact, if it wasn't so difficult everyone would be successful and wealthy. Most people don't have what it takes to make it.  But for you, you sound like a bright guy, so it's really up to you how successful you want to be.  Perhaps you won't have a partnership at a major law firm handed to you on a silver platter like some Harvard grad but that doesn't mean that you can't earn it by being better than the rest.  It's really up to you.

You gotta believe you can acheive your dreams or you might as well give up now.

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LOXO7

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#11 LOXO7
Member since 2008 • 5595 Posts

College is a waste of time and money. You should have learned that by now. Government high schools tell you to go to government funded colleges so you can be in government debt and feel bad.

Don't feel bad. The interest rates of all Stafford loans have fixed interest rates, which means they are set in place and will not rise if by chance the money it follows loses value.

This is good because the dollar will keep losing it's purchasing value. It will cost less to repay this debt in dollars when you buy dollars with real money (silver) that you have obtained starting today. Or you can wait and not pay back this poorly granted loan until the dollar's value reaches zero and not pay a single cent back.

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CodingGenius

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#12 CodingGenius
Member since 2004 • 8118 Posts
College is a waste of time and money for some people. People who are not academically inclined and/or who take out expensive loans without having a purpose or goal in mind. Remember that without it, we wouldn't have doctors, lawyers, engineers, and many other important professions.
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Ace6301

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#13 Ace6301
Member since 2005 • 21389 Posts
Don't worry, everyone is terrified of their future so you're not alone in that regard. Just be happy you have something to fall back on no matter what happens, some people aren't so fortunate.
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sune_Gem

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#14 sune_Gem
Member since 2006 • 12463 Posts

Like that turtle on Kung Fu Panda says. The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift. That's why they call it the present. ;)

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LOXO7

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#15 LOXO7
Member since 2008 • 5595 Posts
[QUOTE="CodingGenius"]College is a waste of time and money for some people. People who are not academically inclined and/or who take out expensive loans without having a purpose or goal in mind. Remember that without it, we wouldn't have doctors, lawyers, engineers, and many other important professions.

The context of college has changed. My father worked his way through college. I wish I could have done the same. People did that. It was normal. Not so today. Where there people called doctors without degrees saying so? Current colleges are a waste of time and money.
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tenaka2

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#16 tenaka2
Member since 2004 • 17958 Posts

Stop stressing, you may not even have a future.

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Mochyc

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#17 Mochyc
Member since 2007 • 4421 Posts
First thing you need to tell yourself: you are not alone! Me and my friends are exactly in the same situation. We are all excellent students and very hard working, yet we don't know what do with our future. My piece of advice is: do what makes you happy. You don't need to prove anything to anyone. You are your own man.

If you ask me, life isn't worth living if you don't take any risks. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Check out this interesting speech by Alan Watts. The music is really dramatic, but I find the message very important. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2L_cGjQSR80
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ferrari2001

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#18 ferrari2001
Member since 2008 • 17772 Posts

Obama is in office you don't need a paycheck. Between welfare, foodstamps and unemployment you can live quite comfortably. Do whatever you like and you'll be fine. 

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MakeMeaSammitch

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#19 MakeMeaSammitch
Member since 2012 • 4889 Posts

Obama is in office you don't need a paycheck. Between welfare, foodstamps and unemployment you can live quite comfortably. Do whatever you like and you'll be fine. 

ferrari2001

you seem like a pretty selfish person...

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ferrari2001

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#20 ferrari2001
Member since 2008 • 17772 Posts

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"]

Obama is in office you don't need a paycheck. Between welfare, foodstamps and unemployment you can live quite comfortably. Do whatever you like and you'll be fine. 

MakeMeaSammitch

you seem like a pretty selfish person...

To be clear I receive no government assistance, unless Stanford Studen Loan counts.
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MakeMeaSammitch

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#21 MakeMeaSammitch
Member since 2012 • 4889 Posts

[QUOTE="MakeMeaSammitch"]

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"]

Obama is in office you don't need a paycheck. Between welfare, foodstamps and unemployment you can live quite comfortably. Do whatever you like and you'll be fine. 

ferrari2001

you seem like a pretty selfish person...

To be clear I receive no government assistance, unless Stanford Studen Loan counts.

cool.

you still seem selfish and disconnected from alot of people.

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ferrari2001

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#22 ferrari2001
Member since 2008 • 17772 Posts

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"][QUOTE="MakeMeaSammitch"]you seem like a pretty selfish person...

MakeMeaSammitch

To be clear I receive no government assistance, unless Stanford Studen Loan counts.

cool.

you still seem selfish and disconnected from alot of people.

And you got that from that post? Hell, have we even met?
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MakeMeaSammitch

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#23 MakeMeaSammitch
Member since 2012 • 4889 Posts

[QUOTE="MakeMeaSammitch"]

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"] To be clear I receive no government assistance, unless Stanford Studen Loan counts. ferrari2001

cool.

you still seem selfish and disconnected from alot of people.

And you got that from that post? Hell, have we even met?

don't need to. 

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deactivated-5acfa3a8bc51d

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#24 deactivated-5acfa3a8bc51d
Member since 2005 • 7914 Posts
Congratulation your past sounds like a success story. Stay in school and pursue environmental law. At this point it's time to start making important friends. it's all about connections maybe a student or even a professor can help you get a job in the future. Still terrifying in a way, I'm not anti social but definitely feel the pressure of making new friends that may know about a job offer or get you into their workplace.
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ferrari2001

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#25 ferrari2001
Member since 2008 • 17772 Posts

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"][QUOTE="MakeMeaSammitch"]cool.

you still seem selfish and disconnected from alot of people.

MakeMeaSammitch

And you got that from that post? Hell, have we even met?

don't need to. 

Well ok then, although I think your physic abilities might be malfunctioning. I'll send someone over right away to look at them.
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MakeMeaSammitch

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#26 MakeMeaSammitch
Member since 2012 • 4889 Posts

[QUOTE="MakeMeaSammitch"]

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"] And you got that from that post? Hell, have we even met?ferrari2001

don't need to. 

Well ok then, although I think your physic abilities might be malfunctioning. I'll send someone over right away to look at them.

I got all I need from your post is what I'm saying.

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ferrari2001

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#27 ferrari2001
Member since 2008 • 17772 Posts

[QUOTE="ferrari2001"][QUOTE="MakeMeaSammitch"]don't need to. 

MakeMeaSammitch

Well ok then, although I think your physic abilities might be malfunctioning. I'll send someone over right away to look at them.

I got all I need from your post is what I'm saying.

You know that whole post was sarcasm right? I guess you could gather from it that I enjoy sarcasm, but that still doesn't tell you much.
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comp_atkins

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#28 comp_atkins
Member since 2005 • 38943 Posts
you set your own goals in life and only have to live with yourself.
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Ernesto_basic

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#29 Ernesto_basic
Member since 2002 • 2123 Posts

Okay. So here is where I am at- I am about to graduate from a state university with a BA in history. Right now I am leaning towards law school for environmental law because 1. environmental issues are a passion 2. it interests me. But it terrifies me. It can financially wreck you and doesn't guarantee a paycheck like it used to.

At the same time, I have a fantasy of becoming a musician, but obviously, REAL success in that is not realistic. And only recently have I started getting a musicians "career" (and i use that term lightly) going. I have started playing consistantly with one person and gigs are on the horizon.

 

Here is the wild card: In my last few years of highschool, I "woke up", and started taking school much more seriously as a path to success. I started taking classes with the kids who are in ivy league schools now, and I feel I am staring at the glass ceiling. I have this desire for success, money, and influence, and either of my paths do not guarantee that, but the alternative to not trying is staying at my dead end (though not "bad") college kid job.

I feel like I need to prove something to myself and the world. I have never felt recognized for successes and I am afraid that lashing out and going gung ho in any direction will just lead to more dissapointment.

OT, HALP.

IronBeaver

Just curious, but what is behind your aspirations to achieve material success and "influence," as you put it? I'm in the middle of law school and to be quite frank, that mindset is both prevalent and well-worn as it can get. If your motivations seem as shallow -- sorry, bud, but that's the way YOU present it -- as they seem, then I don't know how getting a JD, regardless of where it's minted from, will distinguish you from the rest of the social-climbing, throat-cutting, toadies who pursue the profession (in droves) on either admitted or false pretenses.

That haughty angst, that is, the "I have something to prove," "chip on my shoulder" mentality you're harboring there, is something I sincerely hope you grow out of. It's that kind of mentality that professionals, never mind those who possess the power to seriously mislead others through their ability to practice law, need to abstain from indulging, as it almost always leads to destructive, ruinous results on both a professional and personal level.

Honestly, it sounds like you should do a little "growing up" before you decide to make the life-changing decision of attending law school. Moreover, and I sincerely hope that this is something you do, I suggest that you seriously consider whether you want to help others in the pursuit of justice (you know... the whole point of law?).

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the_bi99man

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#30 the_bi99man
Member since 2004 • 11465 Posts

The first thing you need to do is drop the idea that you need to be successful to "prove something" to the world. Work towards success for yourself, and nobody/nothing else.

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the_bi99man

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#31 the_bi99man
Member since 2004 • 11465 Posts

Just curious, but what is behind your aspirations to achieve material success and "influence," as you put it? I'm in the middle of law school and to be quite frank, that mindset is both prevalent and well-worn as it can get. If your motivations seem as shallow -- sorry, bud, but that's the way YOU present it -- as they seem, then I don't know how getting a JD, regardless of where it's minted from, will distinguish you from the rest of the social-climbing, throat-cutting, toadies who pursue the profession (in droves) on either admitted or false pretenses.

That haughty angst, that is, the "I have something to prove," "chip on my shoulder" mentality you're harboring there, is something I sincerely hope you grow out of. It's that kind of mentality that professionals, never mind those who possess the power to seriously mislead others through their ability to practice law, need to abstain from indulging, as it almost always leads to destructive, ruinous results on both a professional and personal level.

Honestly, it sounds like you should do a little "growing up" before you decide to make the life-changing decision of attending law school. Moreover, and I sincerely hope that this is something you do, I suggest that you seriously consider whether you want to help others in the pursuit of justice (you know... the whole point of law?).

Ernesto_basic

....

Yes.

So yes.

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sune_Gem

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#32 sune_Gem
Member since 2006 • 12463 Posts

The first thing you need to do is drop the idea that you need to be successful to "prove something" to the world. Work towards success for yourself, and nobody/nothing else.

the_bi99man

I got that feeling too though. It's like so many thought they were better than me growing up that I just want to shove it in their face that they were wrong.

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BenedictArnold7

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#33 BenedictArnold7
Member since 2012 • 743 Posts
To say college is a waste of time as a blanket statement is absurd. It can be a waste of time if one is doesn't care about education and has no real goals like someone else stated. Someone who is serious about getting an education, like myself and others on here... benefit immensely from going to college even if they don't land a job right away or EVER. It makes you more capable. Of course I am not implying that by not going to college you are necessarily a fool. I kind of have a similar dilemma at the moment. I also want to go to law school, but at the same time I am considering pursuing a career in entertainment... also realizing the odds of making a living doing that requires an immense amount of effort without any guarantee. I think what you really have to do is dig really deep. What do you truly love? What really makes you happy? There are certainly answers to those questions. Maybe it is worth being a struggling artists and eating **** for years and having an entry level job until you are capable enough to make a living out of it.
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KiIIyou

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#34 KiIIyou
Member since 2006 • 27204 Posts
Don't think about it and just do, just careful its nuffin' thatll get you killeded.
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Allicrombie

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#35 Allicrombie
Member since 2005 • 26223 Posts
I'd be afraid too with a name like IronBeaver. Seriously though, it's a trait a lot of people have called compare and despair. That is, comparing yourself and your accomplishments to other people. You just have to remember that not everyone is going to achieve success at the same age or same time as someone else. Lots of things can get in the way, like medical issues, family issues, career issues, etc. It's okay to achieve success in your own time, at your own pace.
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Rich3232

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#36 Rich3232
Member since 2012 • 2628 Posts
I used to feel serious despair whenever I thought about my future, but now, it's reached a point where I just don't care anymore. If it happens, it happens. Ain't fvck all I can do about it.
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IronBeaver

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#37 IronBeaver
Member since 2009 • 1986 Posts

[QUOTE="IronBeaver"]

Okay. So here is where I am at- I am about to graduate from a state university with a BA in history. Right now I am leaning towards law school for environmental law because 1. environmental issues are a passion 2. it interests me. But it terrifies me. It can financially wreck you and doesn't guarantee a paycheck like it used to.

At the same time, I have a fantasy of becoming a musician, but obviously, REAL success in that is not realistic. And only recently have I started getting a musicians "career" (and i use that term lightly) going. I have started playing consistantly with one person and gigs are on the horizon.

 

Here is the wild card: In my last few years of highschool, I "woke up", and started taking school much more seriously as a path to success. I started taking classes with the kids who are in ivy league schools now, and I feel I am staring at the glass ceiling. I have this desire for success, money, and influence, and either of my paths do not guarantee that, but the alternative to not trying is staying at my dead end (though not "bad") college kid job.

I feel like I need to prove something to myself and the world. I have never felt recognized for successes and I am afraid that lashing out and going gung ho in any direction will just lead to more dissapointment.

OT, HALP.

Ernesto_basic

Just curious, but what is behind your aspirations to achieve material success and "influence," as you put it? I'm in the middle of law school and to be quite frank, that mindset is both prevalent and well-worn as it can get. If your motivations seem as shallow -- sorry, bud, but that's the way YOU present it -- as they seem, then I don't know how getting a JD, regardless of where it's minted from, will distinguish you from the rest of the social-climbing, throat-cutting, toadies who pursue the profession (in droves) on either admitted or false pretenses.

That haughty angst, that is, the "I have something to prove," "chip on my shoulder" mentality you're harboring there, is something I sincerely hope you grow out of. It's that kind of mentality that professionals, never mind those who possess the power to seriously mislead others through their ability to practice law, need to abstain from indulging, as it almost always leads to destructive, ruinous results on both a professional and personal level.

Honestly, it sounds like you should do a little "growing up" before you decide to make the life-changing decision of attending law school. Moreover, and I sincerely hope that this is something you do, I suggest that you seriously consider whether you want to help others in the pursuit of justice (you know... the whole point of law?).

 

Environmental issues are a passion and I figure that I would be best suited for a legal role in them. I am a history major, and have a basic understanding of fact finding, analysis, cause for laws, etc., but also have a bio minor and understand the science.

I have just read some horror stories on people who get ruined by law school debt and on top of that, they say that other lawyers around them are frankly "scummy", and all of these lawyers are working underpaid long hours and just burning out.

I really do appreciate your response. I feel like in the last couple days I have kinda decided to push this ahead a little longer and try to find some internship or NGO related legal work instead of going straight to law school. Between now and then I might even decide against it.

This comparison issue of mine is something that I am working on with my shrink. It sucks, I know, and I think getting over it will be great for me.

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Hakumen21

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#38 Hakumen21
Member since 2013 • 359 Posts

you do realize a whole lot of ppl your age have much worse problems than this, right?

ppl just dont say much on their problems.

 

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CKYguy25

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#39 CKYguy25
Member since 2012 • 2087 Posts

musician huh? better start trying out for American Idol then