Scenes we would like to see - things you dont want to hear on a plane

This is a small game based on a Brittish TV program called mock the week, i come up with a topic and everybody have to say things they would like to hear from that topic.

Todays topic is things you dont want to hear on a plane

to start you off

Dont think of it as crashing, just landing a bit more vertically than normal"

"Allah Akhbar!"

ive never heard of this program im also from the UKsolidgamer

Thanks goodness were flying, im to drunck to drive

"Just a bit of turbulence, due to some air pockets thrusting against the body of the plane... this is absolutely normal, so there is nothing to be worried about, and enjoy the rest of your flight............BTW, is there anyone on board that knows how to fly a plane?"

:o

here is something from one of Bill Cosby's really old stand-up shows:

when you're walking into the plane, just yell out, "HOPE THE PLANE DON'T CRASH!!!"

then you know everybody will be worrying about that the whole time :D

"Allah Akhbar!"

ElZilcho90

pretty much

"Allah Akhbar!"

ElZilcho90

Have an onboard air marshall say....

"They did the ONE thing that they didn't train us for in the FBI... they put SNAKES on the PLANE!"

TheresMutha F****** snakes are on this Mutha F****** plane

yeah i know its stupid but it had to be said

Pilot-Good God, Steve! We're going to crash! Oops - is the intercom on?

Pilot- 'We'll be on the ground in 10 minutes. One way or the other'

When do we get a new topic? The next topic should be "Things you don't want to hear during surgery." I'll start: "Wait... that's not supposed to come out is it?"Bulldog19892

from the simpsons - "the bladder is attached to the intestine, the intestine is attached to the red thing, the red thing is attached to my wrist watch... oh no"

ooooo thoguht of another surgery one...

-has anyone seen my phone?

*beeping and flashing from patients body*

Captain - "Whoops"

------

Stewardess - "Captain, this man left his ticking shoe for you."

------

Captain - "And joining us on this flight is the cas of the hit show Lost, a show in which one of them believes he/she is cursed and they cause their plane to crash on an island killing hundreds, enjoy the flight"

------

Captain - "Wonder what this button does, oh, oh yeah we're losing fuel now. My bad people, that was me!"

-------

Captain Roger - "Billy, do you like watching movies about Gladiators?"

Surgery - There's been some complications, we had to use car parts, unfortunately the budget was cut again so we had to use cheap car parts, greenpeace will probably stab on the way out for pollution and you face up to five time more tax

Welcome to Jet Blue

"Just a bit of turbulence, due to some air pockets thrusting against the body of the plane... this is absolutely normal, so there is nothing to be worried about, and enjoy the rest of your flight............BTW, is there anyone on board that knows how to fly a plane?"

:o

freakyzeeky1986

Ah, Airplane, the funniest movie of all time.

Pilot-Don't worry; this baby can still fly just fine with only one engine.

Pilot-Captain, did you just say, "Thank you for flying Jihad Airlines" ?

1. Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. The good news is, if we dump the rest of the luggage now, we may be able to glide all the way to the mainland.

2. *intercom*- Holy sh*t! there's a spider in here! (plane dives and swerves erratically) Oh, wait, that's just some lint. Okay, nevermind.

"Welcome to Oceanic Airlines Flight 815."Conanfan1

Beat me to it.

"Allah Akhbar!"

ElZilcho90

:lol:

[QUOTE="ElZilcho90"]

"Allah Akhbar!"

arab_prince

:lol:

And our pilot for today is Kamakazi Joe. Sexy Air Stewardess

"Allah Akhbar!"

ElZilcho90

yup