So...what exactly is Spider-Sense?

Because, like, the movies and comics make it seem like spiders have this wondrous ability to sense any attacks and avoid them.

But see...I've actually owned spiders. And I've caught many spiders. And in my anecdotal experience, one thing I've learned is that spiders can't sense a damn thing until you get right up in their faces.

Really...catching a spider is something like this...

Step 1: See a spider.

Step 2: GRab a cup.

Step 3: Walk up to spider, and casually position cup one inch above spider.

Step 4: Quickly place cup over spider, trapping spider.

Spiders are dumb as hell. Not only are they dumb, but they can't sense ****.

Think about it this way. If a spider that you see in your home is like Spider-Man, then you're like ****ing GALACTUS. And yet, you can't see Galactus coming until he's about two inches in front of your face.

THAT is what spiders are like.

Really man, spiders are weak as hell. Ever seen one of those big ass spiders that makes those big 3 foot wide webs? Well next time you see one of those spiders, LOOK AT IT. Notice that you're about a MILLION times its size, and it won't react to you walking past it. Spiders see an animal a MILLION times their size get within easy snacking distance, and they have no freaking idea just how close they came to getting eaten.

For added kicks, next time you see one of those spiders, blow on it. Put your face right next to the bastard and just breathe on it. The spider's defense? It doesn't shoot poison at you, it doesn't jump on your face and bite your eyeball. No, it sits smack dab right in the middle of its web and ROCKS BACK AND FORTH. As if the fact that it now turned its web into a rocking chair is somehow going to hurt you, or prevent you from totally destroying the ****ing animal.

Dude, spiders suck. If Spider-Man actually got Spider-Powers from a spider, here's what would happen in the real world. He would suddenly become almost completely blind, and he'd become a drooling idiot with an IQ of 30. During his battles with the Green Goblin, his preferred fighting tactic would then be to run 5 feet in any random direction, and then stop in the hopes that the Green Goblin can't see him anymore.

So really, where the HELL did Stan Lee get the idea that getting spider-powers would make a human being awesome?

You DO know that the spider who bites Peter Parker is actually a genetically engineered, radio-active insect that escapes quarantine, right?creeping-deth87

thats a minor detail

[QUOTE="creeping-deth87"]You DO know that the spider who bites Peter Parker is actually a genetically engineered, radio-active insect that escapes quarantine, right?Cloud_Insurance

thats a minor detail

That minor detail is what his whole reasoning is based upon.

[QUOTE="Cloud_Insurance"]

[QUOTE="creeping-deth87"]You DO know that the spider who bites Peter Parker is actually a genetically engineered, radio-active insect that escapes quarantine, right?Sajedene

thats a minor detail

That minor detail is what his whole reasoning is based upon.

that was me being sarcastic again

[QUOTE="creeping-deth87"]You DO know that the spider who bites Peter Parker is actually a genetically engineered, radio-active insect that escapes quarantine, right?Cloud_Insurance

thats a minor detail

Actually its the best way to answer all the questions brought forth.

You DO know that the spider who bites Peter Parker is actually a genetically engineered, radio-active insect that escapes quarantine, right?creeping-deth87

So...In addition to becoming nearly blind and losing all rational thought, Peter Parker also develops terminal cancer?

Check this out about Spider-sense

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spider-Man%27s_powers_and_equipment#Spider-sense

Good 'ol wikipedia.

Its a comic book, its fantasy and not meant to be based in any sort of scientific reality. Still, I think the logic is that some insects can detect things coming from behind them (like flies), although spiders are not insects, I think its quite possible that they used that train of reasoning in order to construct the "spider-sense."

Well, in fairness, I don't think Spider-Man would do that well against Galactus.xaos

He might be able to kill a few thousand of the Ultimate Galactus' drones.

Man I love your threads.

They never fail to give me a chuckle. I do wish you would make more of them.

Dude, spiders suck. If Spider-Man actually got Spider-Powers from a spider, here's what would happen in the real world. He would suddenly become almost completely blind, and he'd become a drooling idiot with an IQ of 30. During his battles with the Green Goblin, his preferred fighting tactic would then be to run 5 feet in any random direction, and then stop in the hopes that the Green Goblin can't see him anymore.

MrGeezer

Lol :lol:

[QUOTE="creeping-deth87"]You DO know that the spider who bites Peter Parker is actually a genetically engineered, radio-active insect that escapes quarantine, right?MrGeezer

So...In addition to becoming nearly blind and losing all rational thought, Peter Parker also develops terminal cancer?

Man im pretty sure theres spiders out there that can catch and eat small fish and birds. I mean... thats not a bad power. i cant do that.Witchsight

It's a comic book...AtomicBaconBits

Agreed. Comics have no idea of what reality is.

How come a man for a start trip can extend his body?? If eye cells were completely transparent, then that person would be blind...

REALITY is different from comics.

shouldn't he have grown more eyes though?comp_atkins

Oh he did :o