why has Jesus taken so long to return?

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SpaceMoose

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#51 SpaceMoose
Member since 2004 • 10789 Posts
Because God likes to play mind games. It's kind of his thing.
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DJ-Lafleur

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#52 DJ-Lafleur
Member since 2007 • 35604 Posts

He's still stuck in traffic. you guys would not believe how crazy the roads get in heaven! :?

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deactivated-5e7f221e304c9

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#53 deactivated-5e7f221e304c9
Member since 2004 • 14645 Posts
He lost his keys.HillyBilly
I think he just lost track of his keys and has to try each one.
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SouL-Tak3R

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#54 SouL-Tak3R
Member since 2005 • 4024 Posts

Because he doesn't have magical powers like people think/thought

lol

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ice144

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#55 ice144
Member since 2005 • 3350 Posts

Do you think he would freak out seeing all of his followers carry around the device that killed him?

entropyecho
o lawdy lawd you just made me get teary from laughing.
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BumFluff122

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#56 BumFluff122
Member since 2004 • 14853 Posts

I last saw him type BRB so I think he's taking a leak. That was years ago though and since God doesn't live in our temporal reality it may take him awhile longer.

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Monkeyboy_172

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#57 Monkeyboy_172
Member since 2007 • 362 Posts

God changed the respawn times

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Ballroompirate

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#58 Ballroompirate
Member since 2005 • 26695 Posts

Look what happened to Aeris Gainsborough , people just ran out of phoenix downs.

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efrucht

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#59 efrucht
Member since 2008 • 1596 Posts

Perhaps he already came

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im_mr_brown

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#60 im_mr_brown
Member since 2006 • 2970 Posts

He's probably still angry we killed him last time he was here.

KG86

Do you think he would freak out seeing all of his followers carry around the device that killed him?

entropyecho

God changed the respawn times

Monkeyboy_172
i was in tears. well played good sirs.
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Gaming-Planet

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#61 Gaming-Planet
Member since 2008 • 21106 Posts

When people die, they stay dead.

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ShotGunBunny

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#62 ShotGunBunny
Member since 2004 • 2184 Posts
He's not done with his 40 virgins....oh wait, I'm thinking about something different.
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MagusAugury

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#63 MagusAugury
Member since 2009 • 366 Posts

He might be here on earth already... watching you through your window... think twice beofre you do what your thinking of doing!

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deactivated-5a79221380856

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#64 deactivated-5a79221380856
Member since 2007 • 13125 Posts

He might be here on earth already... watching you through your window... think twice beofre you do what your thinking of doing!

MagusAugury
Is it Christmas already?
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-Jiggles-

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#65 -Jiggles-
Member since 2008 • 4356 Posts

Dead people, from what I've noticed, usually remain dead and don't come back alive... Unless Jesus is a zombie.

>_>

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glenn2709

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#66 glenn2709
Member since 2005 • 1719 Posts

He might be here on earth already... watching you through your window... think twice beofre you do what your thinking of doing!

MagusAugury
You make Him sound like a freak.
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mindstorm

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#67 mindstorm
Member since 2003 • 15255 Posts

Dead people, from what I've noticed, usually remain dead and don't come back alive... Unless Jesus is a zombie.

>_>

-Jiggles-
Actually... all those who are Christians will raise from the dead on the last day according to 1 Corinthians 15. :P ...in other words, I will one day be a zombie.
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maidonian2000

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#68 maidonian2000
Member since 2009 • 66 Posts

Dead people, from what I've noticed, usually remain dead and don't come back alive... Unless Jesus is a zombie.

>_>

-Jiggles-
Jesus had a soulstone (for all the WoW fans out there). Maybe (if he exists) he isn't scheduled to return. Just because we are here now doesn't mean he has to come down just because we say so.
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mindstorm

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#69 mindstorm
Member since 2003 • 15255 Posts
[QUOTE="-Jiggles-"]

Dead people, from what I've noticed, usually remain dead and don't come back alive... Unless Jesus is a zombie.

>_>

maidonian2000
Jesus had a soulstone (for all the WoW fans out there). Maybe (if he exists) he isn't scheduled to return. Just because we are here now doesn't mean he has to come down just because we say so.

Which would go completely against the Bible. The promise of Christianity is not simply "going to heaven" but God recreating the earth. Heaven is a short term vacation which will last until the Day of the Lord, when Jesus returns to usher in a new kingdom, one without sin.
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-Jiggles-

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#70 -Jiggles-
Member since 2008 • 4356 Posts

[QUOTE="-Jiggles-"]

Dead people, from what I've noticed, usually remain dead and don't come back alive... Unless Jesus is a zombie.

>_>

mindstorm

Actually... all those who are Christians will raise from the dead on the last day according to 1 Corinthians 15. :P ...in other words, I will one day be a zombie.

I reject your assumption. Priests love to kick the asses of zombies, do they not?

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mindstorm

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#71 mindstorm
Member since 2003 • 15255 Posts

[QUOTE="mindstorm"][QUOTE="-Jiggles-"]

Dead people, from what I've noticed, usually remain dead and don't come back alive... Unless Jesus is a zombie.

>_>

-Jiggles-

Actually... all those who are Christians will raise from the dead on the last day according to 1 Corinthians 15. :P ...in other words, I will one day be a zombie.

I reject your assumption. Priests love to kick the asses of zombies, do they not?

Well, I suppose I just found my sermon illustration for the next time I preach. :shock: ...and yes, I am kidding about the illustration part. (but not the preaching :P)
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quadraleap

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#72 quadraleap
Member since 2004 • 36581 Posts
Though I am agnostic, some may say he never really left. (?)
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Epic__Lulz

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#73 Epic__Lulz
Member since 2007 • 454 Posts

Keep waiting brewski

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clembo1990

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#74 clembo1990
Member since 2005 • 9976 Posts
He's already come, silly. Some heretics only believe he came once, some believe he never came, but he came twice you can ask anyone who tells the truth.
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dragonmaster64

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#75 dragonmaster64
Member since 2003 • 6104 Posts

please correct me if I make any mistakes:

from what I seen you will always get responces like

1. He is giving our generation a chance to repent and receive His salvation.

2. He is testing the strength of our faith and commitment.

3. He is giving the church opportunity to evangelize the lost.

4. His delay encourages us to work faithfully, as though death is yet in the future, but to be ready for His coming at any time.

but seriously does that seem like its ever gonna happen from my perspective humanity is going in the oppoisite direction...so is there another reason why
Jesus delays his return? We know from the bible that when he does the second time it will be the end of the world in revelelation.we know this because atJesus' crucifixion, He told his His disciples with these well-known words, "In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also." John 14: 2, 3 and its said in revelation (2 lazy to post the quotes)

Christ assured His followers that His desire for them is that they may join Him in His heavenly kingdom. Christians wait for Christ's second coming

Revelation 22:20

He which testifieth these things saith, Surely I come quickly. Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus.

kemar7856

even thuogh its been more than 2000 days in the bible it says something like that Jesus' time is different then our time. something like 1000 days = 1 day in jesus time.