Women of OT. What are the rules?

A guy should NEVER go halves on a 1st Date ,

how shallow is that ..That is Terrible ...:( :( :(

I agree a few dates along the line, if shes on good money

This is the thing. At the begining of last month I was on a date that seemed to be going well. We were talking, laughing flirting and then the check came. I pull out my card to pay for dinner and she stopped me and offered to pay. This generally doesn't happen to me on a first date so I figured she was testing me. I said that's ok and paid for dinner anyway. It was at this point that she got angry and started lecturing me about equality and independence. I was suprised because something like this has never happened to me before. Needless to say I haven't spoken to her since.

A couple of weeks later I went out with a woman that I've been aquainted with for close to 3 years. When I asked her out, her response was very up beat and high enery with an almost "what took you so long" tone. Once again every thing was going great. We were even talking about what we should do the next time we go out. Then the check came. I go to pay for dinner and that's when she offered to pay. A chill went down my spine as I got flashbacks to that night I had two weeks earlier. Then I also remembered some of our telephone conversations about how she enjoys being independent and not relying on others so I backed off and let her pay.

That was the turning point.

As I walked her back to her car I could tell that her whole energy had chaged from excitement to dissapointment. I think the only reason this is bothering me is because I've been aquainted with her for 3 years. If she was just someone I had met the week before I wouldn't care. I called her 3 times and got no response. Now that it's been a week and a half since the last time I tried to call her, I get this "brushy" sounding email that she sent me at 2am that basically says that she's been busy and that she'll talk to me some other time. Which sucks, because to stop obsessing over why she hadn't called me back I'm going out with someone else on Thursday.

Yesterday I was bored at work and started looking around and accidently found this.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/23127265#23500789

Basically it says that 57% of women consistantly offer to pay for a date. Out of the 57% that offer, 40% get offended if you reject their offer and 40% get offended if you accept their offer.

My question to the Ladies of OT is, what advice do you have for men that find themselves cought in this kind of situation? Is there a set of unwritten unsaid rules that should be followed? Or should a guy flip a coin, call out heads or tails, and pray?

genfactor

It is a test; fortunately, you have two options.

1. Let her fume and then leave you offended, thus proving her right. This is what happened to you.

2. Do what I did, and say "Oh, I am sorry, I was only trying to be a gentleman". This causes her to feel guilty since you were only trying to be a nice and you do think of her as an equal. This is also a great conversation starter as you can go on to say

"Yes, I understand woman's rights and I do think of women as equals yada yada yada...if you want, you can pay for the next date, ok?"

The trick with girls is that, while they arent combative, they like to skrimish verbally. You have to be on your toes and ready to come with quick replies to whatever they say.

Girl says: "Why didnt you let me pay? You dont think I am equal?!?"
You say: "Oh, I am just trying to be a gentleman and pay for the meal"
Girl says "Oh thats so old fashioned..."
You say "No, its just how my folks raised me. Tell you what, why dont you take me on a second date and pay for it?"
Girl (hopefully) says "Hmmm ok" and then maybe you can enlighten her on your views of feminine rights.

So the general method for first dates is this:
1. Always pay
2. Counter if she gets offended
3. Try to sneak in your views on female rights
4. Accept it when she offers to pay on the next occasion

If that fails, take the words of the great philosopher Dave Chapelle to heart: "Chivalry is dead...and women killed it"

*EDIT*

Women also kind of like a smartass...if you can make her feel guilty while also working in smartass way of saying youre a gentlman, that works great since she will feel she owes you a second date for belittling you. Then let her pay for that one; worst case, you get a good free meal.