"In the early 1990s, a marketing fad equating clarity with purity began with the remake of Ivory soap from its ****c milky solution; the idea spread to many companies, including PepsiCo. Crystal Pepsi was marketed as a caffeine-free "clear alternative" to normal colas, equating clearness with purity and health. Its marketing tagline was "You've never seen a taste like this". However, the taste was not significantly different from other colas; unlike other colorless soft drinks, which usually have a lemon-lime flavor, Crystal Pepsi tasted much like the original Pepsi."-Wikipedia!!!!
Interviewer: Hi, how fast are you?
FastNorwegian: Faster than Crystal Pepsi.
Interviewer: Thats pretty fast.
FastNorwegian: Ja, you betcha.
Interviewer: How Norwegian are you?
FastNorwegian: I like fish.
Interviewer: Woah!
BEHOLD! The first 2, I'd Really Rather you didn't's.
1.) I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious holier-than-thou ass when describing my noodly goodness. If some people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain. Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.
2.) I'd really rather you didn't use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. I don't require sacrifices, and purity is for drinking water, not people.
BEHOLD! The FINAL answer to how to ask out a girl!
Ok, get this. There is only one real way to ask a girl out. You need to go out and catch some Pokemon. After you do that, you challenge the toughest trainer in school and make sure she is there to see the battle. You must win the battle. After winning the battle, walk up to her and say "I can train more than just Pokemon" and then ask her if she would like to see. You then proceed to bring her to your house. WARNING: DO NOT USE HOT BUTTER. This will ruin everything. You have to watch the Barney movie with her, and near the end you must touch her shoulder. Doing this will make her cry, because the movie is too sad. You must then bust out your Yu-Gi-Oh cards. Once she sees your manly cards, she will cheer up immensly and want to have sex with you. Be careful, its a trap. You must do a barrel roll to avoid her scheme. After doing so, ask her how you look. Regardless of her answer, touch her shoulder again. She will plead to have sex with you. All you say is "You need a permit" and then kick her out. Later on, she will call and ask you out.
Works every time.
SoraX64
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