THE FACTUAL BOOK MANUAL OF THE HOT POCKET FUNDING COMPANY!
Men! In this day in age, you have no time to enjoy a nice hot meal, sometimes, a bunch of god-awful meat put in some bread-like fixture, which is placed in a plastic bag, likely from Wal-Mart.
FACT: In the 1860's the Crystal Pepsi company had been giving free bottles of Pepto-Bismal with all their retailed Hot Pockets, knowing the devastating effects they have on the human bowels.
FACT: The prime goal of Hot Pocket is to have you "dead by dinner" or DBD.
FACT: The Pept-Bismal scandel caused uneasy feelings with the Crystal Pepsi company, so they branched off.
FACT: Jimmy Dean & Hot Pocket have been working together for years.
More facts to come, stay tuned for my hand manual.
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