I would say a CRPG is a game where you create a character with skills, personality, age and background traits which are allowed to change and improve/unimprove through your avatar's actions.
The core of the game and the majority of missions/quests etc must be either not based around combat, or at least give options in most cases to avoid the combat by other means. The world created must be realistic in depth (for the type of world trying to be created), and free-form rather than linear.
The game should have much in the way of interaction in the world, both with NPC and creatures an inanimate objects. These interactions cannot be narrowily based but wise ranging.
If a game is based around combat (ie most quests are based around combat), does not offer ways to avoid most combat, uses real-time FPS/TPS combat for more than 50% of the game with no option to avoid it, includes combat in vehicles such as planes and tanks, etc, and does not allow for details of character and world interaction, it is not an RPG.
To this end, we don't really get RPG's any more. From Oblivion to Stalker to Jade Empire to Mass Effect we are now getting 'Action games with RPG elements', rather than true RPG's. With missions rather than quests, that can be completed only one way (ie get your tank through realtime Third Person combat to reach the other end. Period. Where the story is advance primaraly through real time combat in either the first or third person and where there are no or very few options to avoid combat and advance the story in ways beyond the voilent options.
Mass Effect, for example, expects you to always fight your way into an area or building where there is an enemy. There is no ability to sneak in, avoiding guards, etc. Or bribing them, or persuading them, or anything else. The game is wholely based around TPS combat to get to many locations. Sometimes this is on foot, sometime in a personnel carrier with cannon. This is not an RPG, but it is the trend for not only RPG's but all games.
World in Conflict, for example, although being a so-called RTS, is actually designed to be played fast and furious like an FPS. Few future RPG's are going to be true RPG's and will at best be Action RPG's or even Action Adventures masquerading as RPG's. For some reason publishers want to call their games RPG's, when you think of STALKER and Jade Empire, when they are patently not by historic standards.
The FPS/TPS genre is working it's way into all genres and eventually, no PC game will be released that don't have these features. If you want something different, you will need to do what many many PC gamers have been doing for the last 2-3 years... Go back to (or buy) your old PC games like Darklands or Jagged Alliance (retro gaming), or go to smaller publishers that still do 'real' RPG's like the Seige of Avalon Anthology (independent gaming). Mainstream PC gaming just isn't going to do real CRPG's any more, and that's why it will continue to decline, as it has for the past 5 plus years as it slowly drops more and more genres to replace them with more and more First Person and Third Person Shooters - albeit shooters with better back stories, better world creation and better character creation.
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