hard to say really, some games just aint for some people, that said most RTS games are not that similar.
If I were to point to a few games that are good places to start in RTS gaming, Id say the DOW series (dow1 not 2). And something like wc3 (2 is better tho :P)or starcraft.
I think the only real advice I can give you is to play through the sp campaign first, before heading into mp, ive always seen the sp campaigns as the worlds longest tutorial, often focusing on a specific unit and its usage in each map.
Anyways, DoW1 has some fairly simple to grasp mechanics, it is not a game that focuses on spitting out as many troops as possible, since there is a limit on how many you can have at any given time, so you will not have to know keyboard shortcuts, or have to have a certain clicks per second to play that.
And since troops are gathred in units, and players cant have too many of them, it is nice and each to get a good overview of the maps, and your own troops.
Resources are gained from taking specific areas of the map, so you do not need to spend alot of time making sure the income is acceptible, and build a ton of farms and other.
It does have the basic concepts of an RTS tho, so when you playied DoW you will not really be lost in any rts.
+ its a bloody fun and cool game.
WC3, is more of the old school one, there are 2 parts of this kind of rts game, base building/ economics and troop building and overview.
I think this kind of RTS are far more diffecult for new players, because you have to pay attention, to your base, how many workers there are working, and spit out a constant stream of units, each unit is on thier own in this game, so it can be hard to remember where everyone is.
it is alot faster paced aswell, but the good thing is: If you suceed in playing through the sp campaign with WC or SC, then you will likely be able to hop into just about any rts known to man, and grasp the basic similaritys between the games, and understand teh premises of them.
But as for a "for dummys" guide, I doubt there is one :S trail and error seems to be the name of teh game in rts games, and no 2 people play the same, or build the same.
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