DEBATE Part 4: Playstation 3!!! Xbox360!!! ......w..wii........which is the best?! GEK: Okay, before I go ahead and make the final verdict, you will each be allocated 30 seconds to explain to me why your preferred system is the one worth buying. We will begin with you, 360gears FTW. 360: GEARS!!! GEK: You still have 29 seconds. 360: Okay then...fine. Allow me to elaborate. GEARS OF WAR. Xbox Live. GoW. HDTV support. Gears baby. Strong third party support. Oh, I said Geeaaars Baby. You love it.. The PS3 and Wii cannot compete. GEK: Okay then, we'll leave it at that. And what say you, WiiLink500? Wii: Graphics do not amount to atmosphere. And the Wiimote captures your soul and transports it into the game world at your pleasure. Buttons are a thing of the past. I cannot help but jest at how primal the Wii's console counterparts are. Buttons are so stone age, this is a fact. The Egyptians used movement and brawn to complete the pyramids. And like them, you can do so in the upcoming hit "Pharaoh Mario". You will love the Wii. Thank you. GEK: Okay, that will do. And finally we come to PS3kid. Speak away. PS3: The Playstation 3 provides top-quality entertainment at a price that, in the long run, is well worth it. With top of the line games and expertly designed controls, the Playstatio....wait, wait, this is the wrong sheet again!! PS3kid shuffles through his notes again and grabs another sheet of paper. PS3: Here we are. THE PLAYSTATION 3 IS THE POWERHOUSE AND IT WILL NOT STOP UNTIL IT HAS DESTROYED ALL TREES IN ITS PATH OF DESTRUCTION!!! THE XBOX360 IS A STUPID PUNY DEVICE AND THE WII IS LACKING THE POWER TO COMPETE!!! THE PLAYSTATION 3 DEMANDS YOU PURCHASE IT, OR MURDER AWAITS YOU!!! GEK: Wow, okay. Great. I'll make my verdict now. GEK looks down at some sheets. 360gearsFTW turns to WiiLink500. 360: Before I taste the chocolate sauce of success, I have a question for you. Wii: Then ask it before I raise my Wiimote in triumph. 360: Ugh...anyway, before, a few minutes before you broke into this room...there was a loud banging noise, what was it? Wii: Loud banging noise? 360: Yeah, kind of like BANG! Or perhaps your pathetic non-surround sound ears couldn't hear it. PS3: Oh God...that bang... Wii: I don't know what you're talking about, 360gearsFT....L!!! 360: You son of a--- GEK: I have reached a verdict. WiiLink500 and 360gearsFTW turn towards GEK. PS3kid is looking at the door in shock. GEK: Okay. PS3: That bang... GEK: After all this debating... PS3: It can't be... GEK: I have come to a decision. PS3: Oh no... GEK: The greatest console of all time IS....... ... ... ... GEK: The winner is... ... ... A rumble is heard outside. PS3: It's here. SLAM!!! The back wall of the debating room slams down right onto the Wii protestors. A massive figure has caused the wall to collapse by it's own force!! Their is too much to smoke to make much of anything. The Wii protestors have evaporated instantly, it is not apparent why.The smoke has cleared. GEK: Oh my God... And now the cause of the evaporation is confirmed. A blue ray of light is darting about the room, destroying anything in it's path. Pictures shatter to nothing and audience member are quickly turned to ash as the ray randomly moves about the room. The ray of light is coming from the object that destroyed that wall: A twelve foot Playstation 3 with razor sharp teeth. PS3kid: My Lord, I am here to love you. Playstation 3: WHO HERE DARE QUESTION MY POWER? WHO HERE DARE COMPETE WITH ME? GEK and WiiLink500 are shell-shocked. 360gearsFTW is completely un-fazed by this monstrosity. 360gearsFTW: Success if Key. GEARS FOR THE WIN!! 360gearsFTW pulls a chainsaw out from under his podium.. 360: THE CHOCOLATE SAUCE OF SUCCESS WILL BE TASTED!!! 360gearsFTW charges up the chainsaw and makes a mad dash towards the Playstation 3. The Playstation 3 sends a ray of blue light right through his heart, and 360gearsFTW falls in a swift defeat. 360: No...not this...not this way... Playstation 3: Taste the defeat, mortal!! Bwa haha!! 360: No, no....I must do...one last... In his final moments of life, 360gearsFTW, extends his tongue to his upper lip. He licks the chocolate and revels in it's beauty.. 360: Sweet chariot... He is dead.. Wii: This is madness!! Playstation 3: FEEL THE TILT!! Playstation 3 crushes WiiLink500 into tiny fragments. GEK bolts for the door. Playstation: RUN COWARD. YOU WILL FEEL MY POWER SOME DAY!!! And GEK runs. He runs to the hills. Beyond them.PS3kid is crying. PS3kid: My saviour!! I told them of your power!! They would not listen!! Playstation 3: Do not fear young one, I am glad. What say me and you go and get some burgers? PS3kid: Yes, Playstaion 3, yes!! Playstation 3 swoops PS3kid up on his shoulders. Playstation: Oh and kid...call me Play. PS3kid: You got it, friend!! And together, as friends, the two of them walked into the twilight night.
Okay I hated how the 360 guy only talked about gears of war and it is not even it's best game that will be halo 3.And as bad and blind as ps3 fanboys are there not that stupid to be only saying the powaaah or whatever dissapointed.Funny how we get dissapointed by a thread what has the world come to.
bloody hilarious but i thought the ps3 shouldnt have won, it should have been destroyed and so none of them would win, to me the ending hints at abit of bias. still, hilarious thread man good job.
Does the survival of GEK hint at a sequel?TheWinds
I was thinking it would be funny if I did a little thing about PS3kids Adventures after the debate...but I'm pretty much out of ideas. EDIT: Actually, screw it, I am doing this.
Alright that one wasn't AS funny as the other three but still funny...even though I'm a little confused...did the PS3 win?...Are you saying the PS3 will reign supreme?
No, not really. I didn't write this thing to make a point or anything. This was actually just going to be a response to what somebody said in another topic about 360/PS3 graphics being debatable, and when I was halfway through I thought I might as well turn it into a joke topic.
The Tragedy of PS3kidChapter One: Console of Power PS3kid: The Playstation 3 has abandoned me. PS3kid stands on the edge of a monstrously sized cliff. He places his foot forward, ready to fall down to his twisted fate. PS3kid: Now there is no hope... And what that, PS3kid cast himself from the highest mountain in System Wars. Finally, after all of the obstacles that had destroyed him inside, the memories would finally end. But things were not always this way.Five years earlier...one year after the debateA war had broken out in System Wars. This was not your average battle, but rather a full scale three-way showdown between the Wii, Xbox360 and PS3 followers. All sides seeked supremacy over the others, and the Playstation 3 had entrusted power of it's armies to his greatest disciple, PS3kid.PS3kid was standing before one of the largest armies he controlled. PS3kid: This topic praises the Wii, and is an affront to the power of the PS3!! Burn this topic, BURN IT TO THE GROUND!! PS3kid threw a torch and set ablaze one of the buildings in this topic. The Wii people reacted violently, but alas they could not destroy the aggressive army that had ambushed them. Drunk with power, PS3kid had destroyed many topics in his time as leader, but there was something about this topic that told him to stay away...something evil lurked about.A lowly moderator approached him. Moderator: Do not enter the last pages of this topic, PS3kid. In there lies a fate that you yourself cannot fathom. But, hungry for conquest, PS3kid picked up the moderator and threw him at a wall. He proceeded into the final pages of the topic...unaware of the tragedy that awaited him.He entered fiercely, destroying all people in a blind fit of rage. With bodies flung in the air and blood pouring on his face, PS3kid screamed "POWER!!!" as he ended all lives within the room. And then, when he heard that blood-curling "CLUNK"...his life changed forever... PS3kid: No, please...no. In his rage, he had killed all that was sacred to him. PS3kid: My controller...my memory card. Why? As PS3kid was overcome with sadness, the Playstation 3 appeared before him.. Playstation 3: You are becoming such a powerful leader, PS3kid. And now, with your Playstation 2 dead, nothing will hold you back!! And at that moment, as the face of the Playstation 3 disappeared into the night, PS3kid decided that he would kill the Playstation 3. He would kill the very console that had made him a hero.Almost five years later...PS3kid awoke from his dream. He was having nightmares of these horrible memories once again. He needed them to end once and for all, and he knew only one who could help him do this PS3kid: THOMPSON!!! PS3kid crashed out of his home. He made his way to Thompson and pulled out a demanding finger. PS3kid: FIVE YEARS!!! I HAVE FAITHFULLY DONE YOUR BIDDING FOR ALMOST FIVE YEARS!!! WHEN WILL THE NIGHTMARES END?? Thompson: I have one final task for you to complete before I can forgive you for your past. PS3kid: My power knows no bounds, Thompson!! I will complete any mission, but only one more!! Thompson: The Playstation 3 is developing a game to the east. This game contains naughty language that will result in a thousand murders on it's release, and it will not stop there. You are to travel there, and destroy the main copy before it destroys the entire world. You are also to kill the Playstation 3, the console of power. PS3kid: AND IF I AM TO DO-- Thompson: Do not shout!! That is sin!! PS3kid: And if I am to do this, to kill a console...the nightmares will end? Thompson: Complete the task PS3kid. Only then will your past be forgiven. And so, PS3kid set out to defeat the console that had once crowned him as the leader of it's armies. PS3kid was attempting to achieve the impossible, and he had no idea what traps awaited him to the east...in the Playstation3 boards...Next Chapter: "Operation Cake Eater"
lol it would have been funny if you ended with like the ps3 being too powerful even for itself, it was consumed by its own power and fled into the mountains. (think golem lol)
This is the most creative thing I have ever read at GS. You have serious talent! I love the fact that it's basically all the bullet points of the SW topics, but in a funny and non-biased form. I almost didn't read it due to the first one's length... but once I got going... I want more. And the cheeseburger part was the best!
It is time. It is time for the greatest story ever told. It is time for the hallowed eye of System Wars to find a path -- to find a way -- and the answers are coming soon. On the island -- after the crash. GET READY:- LOST: The System War Escapades is COMING SOON to a topic near you. "Save the Wiimote, save the world."
DEBATE: PS3? Xbox360? Which is the greatest console of all time?"PS3kid" versus "360gearsFTW" in a clash of the titans!Our debaters take the stage. 360: Just flew in this afternoon, on a wireless aeroplane. PS3: As did I this morning, yet I really felt the tilt from my landing. As did you, 360gearsFTW? Hehe. 360gearsFTW makes a small groaning sound and consistently glares at his opponent. His shirt simply reads "Success is Key". The debate is yet to begin, and already the room is heating up. PS3kid rubs his well-shaved chin. He has showered this day. He is ready, but you can feel that he is not as ready as he may seem. 360gearsFTW is still locked in his stare. PS3kid shows moments of un-settlement in his posture.The lights dim. The man asking the questions, a man who holds the repute of "Gaming equilibrium king", enters the room. He sits down and views the debaters. GEK: Where is the Wii debater? The crowd erupts into a fit of laughter at this obvious joke. 360gearsFTW cannot help but giggle at it, while PS3kid forces out a strenuous laugh that sounds more like a cry. PS3kid: Hilarious as always, Gaming equi--- GEK: Let us begin shall we? PS3kid: Sure thang. For the first time the room is silent. In the distance, outside of the walls, the faint sounds of a protest can be heard. Voices of anger, but they are too far away to be heard. GEK: My first question is directed at you, 360gearsFTW. 360: Locked and loaded. GEK: Many people argue about the graphical capabilities of both the Playstation 3 and Xbox 360. Given that the PS3 is technically more able than the Xbox360, wha-- 360: That's debatable. PS3: I rebut! GEK: Please, please, let me finish the question. Given that the PS3 is technically more able than the Xbox360, what do you have to say for graphics in games for the future, compared to those on the PS3? 360: I've said it once and I'll say it again. Gears baby. Gears of War demonstrates the fallacy behind the idea that more power equals better graphics. You see, when you place a chainsaw through an aliens chest in that game, you don't just see the blood. You live it. From this we can hypothesize that in the future we will no longer have to fantasize about games where we can watch other people eat cheeseburgers, but instead we will reach out and think that we're eating them. It is apparent that most people at this point notice that 360gearsFTW is somewhat of a portly man. A few whispers in the crowd can be heard, he is not swayed however. 360: You will not find this sense of realism from the Playstation 3, but instead you will find false promises and flops all around. We're talking cutting edge technology with the PS3, but with the Xbox360 we're talking reaching out and eating a goddamn cheeseburger. And it's all thanks to the graphical realism that the Xbox360 will achieve in the next few years, while the PS3 will make no use of its power. GEARS FOR THE WIN!! GEK: I uh, wow, okay. And your rebuttal, PS3kid? PS3: Power. Equals. Power. Genghis Khan, Hitler and Captain Hook all knew this. They were all men in positions of power at some time or another, but where will you find them now? DEAD. That's right. D-F-R-H. DEAD. And why, you may ask? Why are they among the buried? BECAUSE THE PLAYSTATION 3 IS IN CONTROL OF THE POWER NOW, THAT'S WHY. PS3kid is loudly shouting by this point. He is starting to move about his podium and randomly pointing about the room. PS3: THE PLAYSTATION 3 WILL CREATE BETTER GRAPHICS THAN THE WORLD. IT WILL BOAST BEAUTIFUL ENVIRONMENTS THAT ARE ALL DUE TO IT'S POWERFUL INTERNAL FUNCTIONS THAT THE PUNY XBOX360 WILL NEVER MATCH. YOU HAD BETTER PLACE YOUR COPY OF "GEARS OF WAR" AWAY FROM A PS3, BECAUSE IT WOULD PROBABLY FEED UPON IT TO INCREASE ITS POWER. THE PLAYSTATION 3 IS NOT JUST A CONSOLE, IT IS A POWERFUL MACHINE THAT WILL DECIDE THE FATE OF GAMING FOREVER, AND HUMANITY TOO, BUT THAT ISN'T IMPORTANT. THANK YOU. Complete silence. Only the outside protest can be heard. 360gearsFTW is no longer glaring; he is surprised...and lacking nourishment. GEK: We'll take a short lunch break, and we'll be right back. The debate has begun strongly and both sides sound so convincing! Who has the upper hand? Who will win? And just what is 360gearsFTW going to order for lunch? WILL WE EVER KNOW? STAY TUNED?!?!? NOTE: Parts 2, 3, 4 and a super bonus spinoff are further down in this thread.dave003
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