It has finally happened. Stephane......has found me:cry: She barged in my horspital room this afternoon like a crazed maniac. I nearly choked on the disgustingly green dry chicken they fed me xD Please.....read on my despair.......and ALex's crazy ness:P 

Me: WTF??!:o HOW CAN THIS BEEEEEE??!!!:cry:

Stephane: :twisted:You thought you could run from me? Don't you know were DESTINED to be together??! Forever......:D

Me: 0.o o.0 your so crazy.....

Alex: *eats chips* OMG look who it is!!! It's no n1pples:|

Staphane: F*** you! You or anyone else won't stop me from being with SCRUMMY BEAR!!! Bring it on MOTHERF*****!!!!!:evil:

Keira: Scrummy Bear??!:lol: Keiran what do you have to say to that....??

Me: >.>......... But she's still hot!:D And kinkay:wink:

Keira: Island Tylenol??:| God Alex your such a man-wh0re.

Alex: Yes. Yes I am8)

Stephane: ARRG! Your all driving me CRAZY!! I'm leaving but I'll be back!!:evil: *walks away slowly*

Alex: "Theeeere she goooes. There she goo again. The crazzy b**** agaaain. And I just can't explaaaain why her crotch is so stinkkkkaaay..."

Me: :lol:

Keira: :lol:

xD Yeah so she left a few hours ago and hasn't been back since. I'm still sleeping with the plastic spork under my pillow....>.>

Hey guys!:D How'ya doin'?? I'm okay. Just finished taking xrays and stuff. My doctors sounds like he's pushing out a terd or something....>.>

Anyway (:P), I just realized I haven't told you guys my full name. So I edicate this blog to my crazy parents who bestowed upon me this crazy name.

Ready? >.> It's:

Aeslec Mickeybo Keiraniel Michael Ren Guisseppe Laurcen Vashen Torent Jovovich-Derant

Yup that's my full name. Some names come from all the different ethnicity's in my family like Mickeybo is Scottish and Giuseppe is Italian. Others.....are probably made up xD

 My first name is actually Aeslec but in school, teachers used to pronounce it ASSLICK.:lol: It's really pronouned eyes-leck. So I just shortened Keiraniel to Keiran. This also explains why my little brother calls me Vash. LOL, so that's my real full name......likey?:P

*sips Pepsi*

Wow, it feels like I haven't been here in years!:o How has everyone been??:) I'm sorry I wasn't here for months.....but I have a legitamate reason!:wink:  Oh, and bear with me, I'm breaking rules and my awesome nurse is helping me type this. Okay....heres the thing....I fell off a cliff.....>.> No, SERIOUSLY.

Does anyone remember that camping trip I took with Keira, Alex and friends and I stepped on that ant ( RIP)?? Well, a few months ago we went back. We sort of wondered around and stumbled upon this gap. Were talking and having a good time and I walk a little further to the gap, maybe at the edge  I don't know......and I fall:?

I don't remember much of it besides the stuff before the fall and waking up in the hospital. Oh man was that the worst awakening in my life!!!!!!:cry: I opened my eyes and I don't know, it kind of felt like my face was reaaly heavy and I was dizzy. I tried to move my mouth and noticed I couldn't. I tried to move at all and noticed I couldn't. Everything just felt.........heavy:?

Keira and Alex and others were there and the doctor came in or he was already there....I have no idea:P He told me I had just underwent SUGERY. I'm still fuzzy so it doesn't really hit me. But he keeps on talking and says that one of my broken ribbs was in a dangerous spot and had somehow got close to my lungs. They were scared it would puncture it so I went into surgery to move it:|

He said some other stuff but I was phasing out:P But, when I finally get my head straight he talls me whats the deal. Now the nurse is feeding me everything he said so don't ask what any of it means:P

One of my legs were broken, a foot, about 3 broken ribbs, broken jaw, arms and a dislodged heart. (WTF IS A DISLODGED HEART?? Damnit I need to ask again....)

........

yeeeeah. That's why I'm writing this like 3 months later. I'm still not fully healed tho. Some fingers are still swollen and my shoulder hurts like a b****. Don't even ask about the rest. You should see me right now, the laptops on my belly, I'm laying down all wired and cast up trying to type without hurting my chest:p....:(

Unfortunately, I will be here at the hospital for many more months. The Doctor said alot of things are shattered and just plain f**** up. In fact I'm breaking rules even typing this:P So, I'm sorry for being tardy. I missed you guys a great deal!:cry: I need a hug....:cry:

P.S. - If I seem unusually happy, it's because I'm doped up on like 6 different pain killers:P

My Thankgiving will suck. Why? STEPHANE IS BACK! With some new stuff too......>.> He's the sory of her arriving at my front door......:cry: Read on:cry:

Stephane: Happy Thanks Giving!:twisted:

Me: WTF? GO AWAY!!!!!!!!:x

Stephane: NO.:evil: We must talk! Do you know I had to cancel our WEDDING over this???!!:evil:

Me: WTFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!:o:o We were NEVER getting married!!! WTF is wrong with you!!!!:|:|

Keira: *comes out the kitchen* You again:| You do know I have a SHOTGUN right:|

Stephane: Keiran wil protect me!!!:D F*** YOU!!!:evil:

Me: :lol::lol::lol::lol:

Alex: You know Ms. Kitty called me yesterday. She said you gave her AIDS you wh0re!:evil:

Stephane: Oh look, it's the idiot coming to save the day! Well, I'm leaving with Keiran today!:D Look *open top*

Keira: :lol:The crazy b**** got boob inplants!!!! ROFL!!!!:lol:

Me: 0.o o.0 WTF?

Alex: EEEWWWWWW!!!! Where's you n1pples???!! :lol:

Stephane: *closes top* You didn't see anything b****!:evil: They look gorgeus!:wink:

Keira: They look like basketballs.:| I swear I can make a dunk with 'em right now:| Yeah......ans where ARE your n1pples?:?

Stephane : F*** YOU!!!:evil: I'll be back!!! TONIGHT!!! *stomps away*

Alex: WAIT!!! Mr. Gerbal says he know how to do it fast:wink: Look at him ride that wheel:P

Keira: .....um.......Mr. Gerbal is NOT moving.....>..>

Alex: Eh??? Mr. Gerbal??! JERRY??!!! NOOOOO!!!! HER EVIL T1TY"S KILLED HIM!!!!! NOOO!!! THE NIPPLES OF INVISIBLE DEATH!!!!:cry::cry::cry::cry:

Keira: 0.0 Damnit Keiran! Your GF evil t1ts killed Jerry!:evil: This is war!!!:evil:

Alex: JEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!:cry:

Me: I....I need a drink X_x x_X

Lol, the painful memories of those children are too strong.:? They.....haunt me....:cry: Sooo, I will tell you about my friend and his ps3:P It was friday morning, and I was sitting at the table eating some atrocious BURNT eggs Alex "cooked", when I heard banging from my door that sounded like someone was having a seizure in front of my door:P So I opened it....

My friend Eric: OMG!! OMG!!!! KEIRAN I HAVE THE PS3!!!!:o:o*runs in my house*:o:o

Chelsea: Please excuse my idiot brother......he camped out for 4 days in front of BestBuy last night:roll:

Eric: YES I DID!!!:D I DRANK COFFEE ALL 4 DAYS!!!:D:D:D:D

Chelsea: I was only there to see how many coffee you need to drink in order to loose your mind. .......turns out it's 73......>.>

Keira: :lol:how was it when it was almost time for it to lauch??

Chelsea: Well, an hour before, 2 guys tried to get my number, and 1 kept staring at the sky mumbling s***:? Also, it turned into a f***ing Mosh Pit when it was time:| My friend got a bloody nose:|

Me: Sounds.....awesome:P

Eric: BUT IT WAS WORTH IT!!!:D LOOK!!! *opens up his bag to reveal a spanking new ps3*:D:D:D:D

Me: :oteh glory!! But.....Eric.....are you sure your alright?? Your spining in circles>.>

Eric: TJOTHVNOEJLmelOJFO!!!!:D

Keira: Riiiiiight. So.....what are we gonna do with it>.>

Alex: *runs down the stairs* I know! First, I'll take it up to my room to have some dirty s3x with it's sleek ass and naughty  ports.:wink: Then, I'll take it to dinner and drink some Red Wine:D After that, we'll come back here to have more naught s3x with it's FRONT ports. (oh yeah) In the morning, I'll tell the b**** it was just s3x and it didn't mean anything and give back to y'all8)

Me: :lol: LMAO! You wh0re:P

Keira: Dirty s3x later!! Now....it's time for Resistence MOTHERF****S!!!!!:D:D

Eric: X__X *sleep*

 The ps3 is......okay.>.> Was totally disapointed tho, especially when I think about all the s*** Sony "promised". Meh:P Also, if you have a ps3.....and was thinking about getting Gundam......just know that I've seen better graphix on a damn Ficher Price game X_X

My friend sent me this.......horrible I know.....but I chuckeled..........*shame* V_V

I love you guys!!!:cry::P Today, this blog is dedicated to you guys!:D Becase you guys are true friends:) I'm glad I met all of you:):P So.........FREE BOOZE AND CHIPS FOR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!:D W00T!!!!!!!:D

*dances*

Hello!:P How have you guys been?:) I've been..........yeah>.> LOL, Grams has been driving me nuts!:x Seriously, she threw her dirty panties in my face yesterday!!:cry: THE HORROR!!!!!:cry: But, today, Grandpa payed a visit!:D W00T!:D And the fighting began.......

Me: 0.o o.0 Grandpa???!:o WTH have you been!!!!:o

Grams: Damnit!!!:x I thought you died days ago you f****!!!:x

Grandpa: :evil:Hello to you too wh0re!:x I knew you came here!!!!:evil: Always bothering these poor kids!!!:x

Alex: Grandpa, she made me wash her!!!:cry::cry::cry:

Grandpa: :oGood lord! Your a brave boy. You survived the jelly rolls and saggy ass!:lol:

Gram: F**** you!!!:x You really shouldn't be talking idiot! It takes you 10 minutes to even find your d*** to take a p1*s!!!:lol:

Keira: Hey!!:x Fight in your own damn house!:x

Grams: Hey Keira, I'll give you 1 cent to got f*** the mailman since you already did:) SO STFU!!!!:evil:

Keira: WHAT!!:evil: OMFG, I'm about to b**** slap right now!!!!:evil:

Me: *holding Keira back* WHY CAN'T WE BE NORMAL!!!!!:cry:

Grandpa: It's okay kids! Grandpa will handle this!:wink:8):evil:

Grams: :lol:YOU?! You f**** limp wrist, saggy piece of crap!:lol:

Grandpa: Heh. Keep talkin'. In about 2 seconds I'm going to put my foot so far up your @ss your hemroids will scream:)

Alex: :oOMG!!! OMG!! TEH OWNAGE!!!!!:lol::lol::lol::lol:

Grams: Little man who talks big words!:lol: Alright I've had it!:evil: I'm gonna kick you in your b***s so hard you'll have freakin v*****!:evil:

Alex: :oTEH COMEBACK!!!!:o

Me: OKAY!:x There will be no kicking of the ass or b***s today!:P Seeming as guys are MARRIED, you had to love something about one another!:x Grandpa?:)

Grandpa: She had great t**s:) That are now hanging [ast her knees like f**** stockings!:evil:

Me: *sigh*Gram Gram?-_-"

Gram Gram: He was a good f***:) That has since turned into nothing because that thing in between his legs is a piece of crap!:x

Gandpa: It's perfectly fine!:evil:

Grams: How would you know??! You haven't seen it in years!!!!:Evil:

Me: *sigh*I'm going back to bed-_-"

LOLERZ, Bill how did you know grams would be coming back??!:o I wish I would've known:cry: I got a call yesterday from her......how the h3ll does she know my number??0.o o.0 Next thing I know she's sitting on my couch watching Maury!!:x The next post is about my crazy grams........:cry:

Grams: *farts*where's the beer!!!:x

Keira: Listen bumpkin, this is not a damn bar.:|

Grams: Heh, you could've fooled me with you looking like a 2 dollar wh0re.....

Alex: :lol:OWN3D!!!!

Me: erm.......Grams, why are you here.........>.>

Grams: :oYour not crippled anymore!!! Anyway, why you need to know?! Don't you love your gram grams!!!:evil:

Keira: NO.:|

Grams: Alex, be a idiot and bring me some cheese:evil:

Alex: 0.o o.0 ONLY the cheese??!:|

Grams: WTF DID I SAY??!!!:evil:

Me and Keira are standing there like WTF at that point. But Alex still goes into the kitchen ans brings her some slices.:?

Grams: *sits on it*:)

Us: WTF?? 0.o o.0

Me: um........wheres grampa?:?

Grams: That f****? Meh, probaly s**** out that uncooked chicken I gave 'em:lol: G0d, I wish he would just DIE already!!! You know we don't even have s3x anymore?:evil:

Keira: WTF? no one wants to hear that!!! Jeez, wth is wrong with you!!:x

Grams: Keira, why don't you and your brothers come with me to Rite Aid before Grams sticks this cane up your boney ass!!!:evil:

Keira: :evil: F*** YOU!!!! Serously, wtf are you going to do?? You'll trip over your saggy t***s!!!:lol:

Grams: Honey, I could take you down with one f**** blow from one b00b alone.:| SO STFU!!!:evil:

Keira: :evil:

Grams: Meh *pulls out cigerarette*

Me: WTF? IS THAT WEED????!!!!!!:o:o:o:o

Grams: yup, it's my medicine:wink:

Me: I HAVE ASTHMA!!!!!!!:x

Grams: Meh, pull the rat out your ass:roll: *puffs* This is some good s***.:D

Me: ..........

And that was this afternoon alone. Excuse me while I go run her bath water. *shudders*

:cry:How you all doin'? Me? Oh, I've been swell..........besides the fact that my gf is assaulting me and my little brother broke his arm.:? But I'll have to tell you about the latter later.

Okay........it's time for you to laugh at my horrible love life. Come on, I know you guys laugh -_-" lol, after my brothers accident, I kinda forgot about Stephane and focused on him. And also, Alex found a cat that happens to like sitting it's @ss right on my face:x

LOL, so it's like 3:00 in the morning and someone is banging on my door. I'm like whatever, and roll over on my bed:P But I hear Keira call me so came down. *WARNING: LANGUAGE AND SEXUAL INUENDOS READ AT YOUR OWN RISK:P* *ALSO IT'S LOOKS LONG BUT IT'S REALLY NOT:P*

Keira: -_-"I can't believe this b**** woke me up from my Johnny Depp dream:x

Me: :lol: LOL! Um......Stephane.....it's like 3:00 in the morning........WTF.:|

Stephane: WHO IS SHE??! WHO HAVE YOU BEEN CHEATING ON ME WITH!!!!:evil:

Me: :|I barely even go anywhere. And first of all......we BROKE UP like 3 weeks ago:|

Stphane: NO. I SAY WHEN WE BREAK UP!!!:evil:

Keira: Do you sleep......at all?!:| Really, I'm like 2 seconds away from beating the crap out of you. But, I'm still in trouble from my last assault.....>.>

Stephane: F*** YOU!!! KEIRAN GET IN MY CAR!!!! NOW!!:evil:

Me: 0.o o.0 so you can kill me? I think I'll stay.........>.>

Alex, who has to be the hardest sleeper ever, finally comes down the stairs:?

Alex: WTF? EVERY freakin' time!!!! GO AWAY!!!!!!!!:evil:

Stephane: Well, look who it is.:evil: Keiran you should know your brother has been lusting after me with his eyes. I think he wants to have s3x with me!!:evil:

Alex: I have s3x with alot of things I'll admit ( minus dudes, ew), but crazy b**** is not one of them. Seriously, if your mouth is this bad, how the h3ll is your v******. It might bite my thing off or something:?

Me: :lol:LMAO! Anyway, it's late and I'm tired. Please go:|

Stephane: Not until me and your brother finsh this!!!!:evil:

Alex: Oh, hey I almost forgot!:) *picks up the cat* This is Mr. Nasty.:) Look! I found you a t cat to f***!:)

Keira: 0_- Oh G0d.........Alex you dumb @ss, that cat is FEMALE.:|

Alex: Eh? *looks at cats bottom >.>* Your right!:P Well, Steph is your feeling a bit Bi-Curious, you can still give it a whirl!:wink::)

Stephane: Funny......not.:evil: Remeber that gf of yours? Alice? You do know that she's baging a totally hot rich better looking guy right?:)

Alex: Yes I do. Infact, I met him. Nice guy. Nice try tho:)

Stephane: I knew that.......>.>