THE UNMOVED MOVER Noting moves without a prior mover. This leads us to a regress, from which the only escape is God. Something had to make the first move, and that something we call God. THE UNCAUSED CAUSE Nothing is caused by itself. Every effect has a prior cause, and again we are pushed back into regress. This has to be terminated by a first cause, which we call God. THE COSMOLOGICAL ARGUMENT There must have been a time when no physical things existed. But, since physical things exist now, there must have been something non-physical to bring them into existence, and that something we call God. THE ARGUMENT FROM DEGREE We notice that things in the world differ. There are degrees of, say, goodness and perfection. But we judge these degrees only by comparison with a maximum. Humans can be both good and bad, so the maximum goodness cannot rest in us. Therefore there must be some other maximum to set the standard for perfection, and we call that maximum God. THE THEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT, OR ARGUMENT FROM DESIGN Things in the world, especially living things, look as if they have been designed. Nothing that we know looks designed unless it is changed. Therefore there must be a designer, and we call him God. ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPLETE DEVIATION A plane crashed killing 143 passengers and crew. But one child survived with only third-degree burns. Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM POSSIBLE WORLDS If things had been different, then things would be different. That would be bad. Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM SHEER WILL I do believe in God! I do believe in God! I do I do I do. I do believe in God! Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM NON-BELIEF The majority of the world's population are non-believers in Christianity. This is just as Satan intended. Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM POST-DEATH EXPERIENCE Person X died an atheist. Now he realizes his mistake. Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL God loves you. How could you be heartless and not believe in him? Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM IGNORANCE Scientists do not know everything. Therefore God exists in the bit that scientists don't know. COSMOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (1) If I say something must have a cause, it has a cause. (2) I say the universe must have a cause. (3) Therefore, the universe has a cause. (4) Therefore, God exists. MODAL ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (1) God is either necessary or unnecessary. (2) God is not unnecessary, therefore God must be necessary. (3) Therefore, God exists. TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (I) (1) Check out the world/universe/giraffe. Isn't it complex? (2) Only God could have made them so complex. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM BEAUTY, a.k.a. TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (II) (1) Isn't that baby/sunset/flower/tree beautiful? (2) Only God could have made them so beautiful. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM MIRACLES (1) My aunt had cancer. (2) The doctors gave her all these horrible treatments. (3) My aunt prayed to God and now she doesn't have cancer. (4) Therefore, God exists. MORAL ARGUMENT (I) (1) Person X, a well-known Atheist, was morally inferior to the rest of us. (2) Therefore, God exists. MORAL ARGUMENT (II) (1) In my younger days I was a cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child-molesting, thieving, murdering, bed-wetting bastard. (2) That all changed once I became religious. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM CREATION, a.k.a. ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL INCREDULITY (I) (1) If evolution is false, then creationism is true, and therefore God exists. (2) Evolution can't be true, since I lack the mental capacity to understand it; moreover, to accept its truth would cause me to be uncomfortable. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM FEAR (1) If there is no God then we're all going to die. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM THE BIBLE (1) [arbitrary passage from OT] (2) [arbitrary passage from NT] (3) Therefore, God exists. PARENTAL ARGUMENT (1) My mommy and daddy told me that God exists. (2) Therefore, God exists ARGUMENT FROM INTERNET AUTHORITY (1) There is a website that successfully argues for the existence of God. (2) Here is the URL. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM FALLIBILITY (1) Human reasoning is inherently flawed. (2) Therefore, there is no reasonable way to challenge a proposition. (3) I propose that God exists. (4) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM SMUGNESS (1) God exists. (2) I don't give a crap whether you believe it or not; I have better things to do than to try to convince you morons. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM MANIFESTATIONS (1) If you turn your head sideways and squint a little, you can see an image of a bearded face in that tortilla. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM SACRIFICIAL BLACKMAIL (1) Jesus died for your sins. (2) Therefore, God exists. OPRAH'S ARGUMENT (I) (1) The human spirit exists. (2) Therefore, God exists. OPRAH'S ARGUMENT (II) (1) Check out this video segment. (2) Now how can anyone watch that and NOT believe in God? (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM MASS PRODUCTION (1) Barbie dolls were created. (2) If Barbie dolls were created, then so were trees. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT OF 'KNOW EVERYTHING OR ATHEISM/EVOLUTION IS WRONG' (1) Ask an atheist to explain every step in the evolution of every animal you can think of until they do not know the answer. (2) They eventually say they do not know. (3) Therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM HISTORY (1) The Bible is true. (2) Therefore, the Bible is historical fact. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM RESURRECTION (1) Proof of God's existence will be available when you rise bodily from your grave. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM SUPERIORITY (1) If God does not exist, then I am an inferior being, since I am not "special" in a cosmic sense. (2) But I am superior because I am a Christian. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM PERFECTION (1) If there are absolute moral standards, then God exists. (2) Atheists say that there are no absolute moral standards. (3) But that's because they don't want to admit to being sinners. (4) Therefore, there are absolute moral standards. (5) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM HUMAN NECESSITY (1) Atheists say that they don't need God. (2) Which just goes to show that they need God. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM KENT HOVIND (1) I don't want to work for a living. (2) I don't want to pay taxes. (3) I can get gullible fundamentalists to send me money. (4) I can use religious exemption claims to tie the IRS up in court. (5) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL SANITY (1) I've had religious experiences that can't be explained unless I'm insane or God exists. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM INEVITABILITY (1) I have proof that God exists. (2) I won't bother to tell you what it is because, being Atheists, you would be hostile to the conclusion anyway. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM POSTMODERNISM (1) I'm going to prove to you that God exists. (2) [Insert any of the other arguments on this page in here.] (3) [Atheist refutes argument.] (4) I cannot prove there is a God any more than anyone of us can prove we really exist in a tangible world. (5) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM FORTUITOUS COINCIDENCE (1) What are the odds of that happening? (2) Pretty long, I'll bet. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM SPEAKING IN TOUNGES (1) My friend here, once started spontaneously speaking some jibberish that sounded to me kind of like Russian. (2) But neither he nor I know anything about Russian. (3) The only explanation is God. (4) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM PRAYER (1) God exists. (2) [Atheist makes counterarguments.] (3) You have my prayers. ARGUMENT FROM FORMATTING (1) Behold, foolish Atheists, I present you with an incontrovertible proof of the existence of God. (2) [Christian posts 10,000 word document without a single paragraph break.] (3) [Atheists' eyes implode.] (4) I see that nobody can refute (2). (5) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM NON-CONFRONTATION (1) I am not here to argue with you Atheists. (2) But come on, God obviously exists. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM EXODUS (1) If the Exodus story has any basis in historical fact, then God exists. (2) Some guy found some chariot wheels at the bottom of the Red Sea. (3) There is absolutely no other way that chariots could get to the bottom of the Red Sea. (4) This means the Exodus story is true. (5) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF DISPROOF (1) You can't prove God doesn't exist! (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF EYEWITNESS (I) (1) You weren't there to witness abiogenisis/Big Bang/etc. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF EYEWITNESS (II) (1) No one's ever seen one species turn into another. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM PREFERRED ANCESTRY (1) I don't want to be related to monkeys. (2) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM DIFFERENCES (1) The Christian God is different than the gods of other religions. (2) Therefore, the Christian God exists. REID'S ARGUMENT (1) You assume that your senses are reliable even though you can't prove it. (2) That means I get to assume anything I want. (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY (1) [Christian posts argument.] (2) [Atheist refutes argument.] (3) Atheist, you obviously didn't understand my argument. (4) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF EVIDENCE (II) (MODIFIED SIMPSON'S ARGUMENT) (1) God, if you exist, please give me absolutely no sign. (2) (3) Therefore, God exists. ARGUMENT FROM THE FOUNDING FATHERS (I) (1) Some of America's Founding Fathers wrote favorably about the Bible. (2) The Founding Fathers were really, really smart. (3) Accordingly, the Bible must be true. (4) The Bible says that God exists. (5) Therefore, God exists. WAYSON'S ARGUMENT (1) Scientists generally accept the theory of evolution. (2) I don't. (3) Therefore, they are lying or fabricating their data. (4) Therefore, God Exists. ARGUMENT FROM DIVINE RIGHT (1) God saves the queen. (2) The queen hasn't died. (3) Therefore, God exists.