I think instead of having commercials that are like:

"do you wish you were just a tiny bit skinnier, although your not fat, everyone is beautiful, we love you...
Now try our diet!"

They need ones that are like:

"Fatty, dont you wish you could go to McDonalds right now and get fat off all the fat there? Too bad your to fat to fit in your Extended Cab SUV that didnt exist up untill you got to fat to fit in anything else. Although it doesnt matter, because your too fat for it anyway. Im sure you wish you could get a boyfriend, but even if your fat ass could, you would likely loose them amongst all your fat. Why dont you try to go hook up with a treadmill or something, im sure it wouldnt mind dating a fat person. You would probably break him though and then all the other treadmills would know not to date fat people because they are too fat. Im sure your probably thinking about going somewhere and getting a salad after all this, but you will soon realize that your fat voice is to nazily (sp?) to pronounce anything but "number 1" from McDonalds.
If this commercial is making you want to take a diet, than ive got a perfect idea. Dont eat you fat ass. Unless you want to get fatter on one of those fat diets thats all "eat lotsa food and loose lotsa weight!" If all the fat wasnt clogging your brain youd probably realize that you cant really loose weight by eating food. It just doesnt work. Then you got to a restraunt filled with people enjoying their meals meals, and complain that everyone is looking at you. Even if they arent glaring at you because you are excesively fat, its probably because you and your fat are the only thing they can even see.
I dont even see how you fat people get so fat. Its like, once you get to the point where you cant walk without some hydralic maching keeping you up, you should realize that your getting pretty fat. Fat people are gross."

Im pretty sure they would work alot better...

I dont eat bread

I eat nails.

^

Rofl
people who think they are above stereotypes def = nerd

Im pure jock/studd

Star Ship Troopers Three!!!!

I realize the second one was crap, but apearantly it was more so to see if people were even still interested in the franchise.

(I dont know if this was stated, I didnt read everything)

Doesnt it also say he created everything in like 11, or 9, or some odd days, people being on the last of them. Yet dinosaurs were around for 160 million years.... before people.

gah

im 16 and 6'1

its reall crappy bein tall

There must be a forecast
That you won't let yourself see
So you keep watching as you're driftin'
Sail away from what you need
Why don't I just give you
Everything you'll take from me
'Cuz nobody owns anything
And everyone is free
Thats why

God fearing people at the bottom of the sea
Walkin' without lanterns let a stone skip over thee
Hi ho away as in the sea
Hi ho be gone lets just dance
Waltz above the ocean

I've heard all of the stories
And in them I've put my trust
You gotta touch the botton before you can come back up
And I know what you'r heart is telling you
'Cuz my hearts telling me the same thing too

(discuss)

You gotta get used to performing. When you practice. Get comfortable with what it is, than start practing near other people, such as your family or something.

Ive always read that its best to practice where your alone and wont be bothered, but from personal experience, thats a dumb idea.

Also, Ive noticed when alot of people perform they attempt to over-do to impress. Never do that. Just relax and enjoy it.

Crap man.

If i ever got more than 10 minuets alone...
Id be jerkin it :/