I've been coming to GS for a while, more than a year, now. And in this time, I've only seen one suicide thread.

C'mon, people! Get with it! Without suicide threads, the terrorists win! And I think everyone misses them. Everyone loves them. Lets face it, suicide threads are hilarious! Usually caused by hackers, suicide threads are a way of expressing yourself! When else are you gonna see curse words on GameSpot? On the blogs? I don't think so, god damn it! When else are you going to see immature people calling certain game systems crap without providing good reason? System Wars? Well, OK.

BUT STILL!

Come on, people! Get out there! Get posting! Get banned!

Every suicide thread you DON'T post, one kitten dies!

Do you want to be the reason this kitten dies? DO YOU?!

So start posting suicide threads! Because I'm too lazy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTvfOfw-ZCk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PUCxtUbgHo

Two songs I wrote.

What do you call a mean German? Sour-kraut.

Toucan Sam got shot in the head. A couple days ago, the Lucky Charms guy disappeared. Count Chocula was found in a garbage bin. Trix rabbit... he's not for kids anymore. And the Honey bee... don't ask.

Police believe it's the work of a cereal killer.

Watch out for the new adult Metal Gear: Metal Gear: My Snake is Solid.

I was messing around with my Guitar Hero 3 last night, and I went to the cheat menu to "jam" freely.

I actually wrote a song. It went like this: 5x Yellow, 6x blue, 5x orange, 6x yellow, 2x red, repeat.

Then the chorus went like: 5x (YO,) 5x (BO,) 5x (YB,) repeat.

Yeah, kinda simplistic, but whatever. I'm not quite happy with it on the GH3 cheat menu, so I might try to finish it on my keyboard.

This blog was very pointless to write.

I spend all together too much time listening to Metallica. Whenever I have nothing to do, I put on my headphones and start headbanging to Sad But True, or Fight Fire with Fire. I just can't stop. It's starting to mess up my life, because now I'd rather listen to music than bathe or even go outside.

Sometimes I'll fall asleep listening to Battery. BATTERY! It's a song written about beating people up, and I'm falling asleep to it. I have Disturbed and Anarchy Club on my MP3 player, too, but I never listen to them.

It's affecting my friendships, even. Now I yell "Gimme Fuel Gimme Fire Gimme That Which I Desire" when I double on my friend's bike. Why? I dunno. It's just random, now. I play Frets on Fire, (a sort of Guitar Hero clone that allows you to add whatever songs you want) and ALL I HAVE are Metallica songs!

Do I need help? Am I in trouble? Am I evil? F*** yeah I-- damn it! I'm doing it again!

You said that all was true,

You said I could listen to you,

Well, listen to you,

You told a f***ing lie.

Well, b*tch, you told a lie,

Ain't gonna see me cry,

Gonna burn you,

DIE!!

(chorus)

Until the night,

Kill the lights...

Pickin' a fight,

Do it right with me.

Until the night,

KILL THE LIGHTS!

Pickin' a fight,

Do it righht with me...

Until it sleeps tonight.

The truth is that I lied.

So, I'm writing a movie. I really don't need to post this, since nobody reads these things. I could pretty much post a detailed descrption of a porno I saw last night. But I'm gonna post this anyway, despite obvious reasons to not.

I'm a very creative person. From stories about secret love in an unusual and unforgiving situation, to secret world orders made just to protect or kill one person. I spend half my time drawing stories out of everyday life. So, naturally, I had to contain this creativity within an outlet.

The name: Alex Harper and the Iron Phantom.

The story: A one million year old alien artifact, the key to the destruction of the universe, is tied tightly to a young girl in the town of Stonewood. An alien hunter by the name of Kadavarus has come from an invisible planet, impossible to locate on a map, looking for the artifact, known as the "Trigger," to activate his planet in the exact coordinates to force a black hole to appear and draw the entire universe into it, thus causing his god to be rescued from an ancient grave withing the human sun. When Kadavarus kidnaps Adrienne West, looking for the location of a group who holds the Trigger, Alex Harper can't allow it. Alex is "secretly" in love with Adrienne, and has been since a very young age, so naturally that means he needs to save her from an incredibly powerful and dangerous alien menace with powers no human can understand.

Well, now anybody who reads this may steal my story. Ah crap. I should probably erase this. Eh, that would require more work. Forget it.

Have you ever had trouble with your children not listening?

Mom: "Timmy, go to your room."

Timmy: "Shut up! You're not my real mom, Laura! My mom lives in Santa Monica! I'm just visiting dad!"

--

Have you ever had coworkers who just wouldn't listen to reason?

You: "I'm telling you, Jim. Lucas just said that Anakin was Darth Vader to solidify the release of a prequel trilogy!"

Jim: "Then explain why he tells Luke he's his father."

You: "I don't need to, you gotta understand that Darth Vader could never have loved Padme like Anakin did!"

--

Have you ever decided that you were right, and everyone else just needed to shut up?

Mom: "Timmy, go to your room."

Timmy: "Shut up! You're not my real mom, Laura! My mom lives in Santa Monica! I'm just visiting dad!"

Mom: "Okay, time to get the device..."

--

Hi, I'm Dudeman McLeod, and you might remember me from such films as "Nothing," or "Nothing II: The Return of Emptiness." And I'm here to show you a new means of negotiation with...

*brandishing weapon* ...the new XTR38000! A.K.A. "board-with-nail-in-it." The XTR38000 will make people forget the words, "you're wrong," or "shut up," or "hey, that's my papaya, give it back." It will also make them forget their middle name, what peach tastes like, and how bad the Ubisoft conference was this year, but mostly just the first thing. The way it works is IMDTech's patented "Ouchie-Stick." What it does is simultaniously drill a nail into someone's head, while beating them with a stick!

So, buy the new XTR38000! Don't just shut 'em up, shut 'em up forever! More fun than a barrel o' monkeys!*

*Note: IMDTech neither partakes in nor supports any monkey, barrel, monkey-barrel, barrel-monkey related activities, or anything else monkey or barrel related. It's just a slogan. Get off my back, PETA.

Just because there are werewolves and vampires jumping around all over the place, that doesn't mean the MySpace police can just treat you like you were a piece of meat. So I'm making my account, and some wise-ass MySpace cop starts strip searching me because apparently I might be a werewolf. I tell him, "No officer, I'm not enjoying this," and "why the hell do you want to know who my daddy is?" By this point I had realized that he was probably not really a cop. So I ran off, and I remembered what I said the last time I was raped, and turned back and repeated it to him. "Ble ble vlark. Zark noradda toh, mezza relio, camplusi." That kept him guessing for what I would assume was several hours, but I had already left the area before fathoming that which I had said.

So now I was walking alone through the "browse" section of MySpace, and thinking all the while about the possible appearance of a werewolf or vampire, and immediately I looked up from my dilemma, and to my mild shock, a werewolf was standing right in front of me! So I said to him, "What are you gonna do, kill me?" To which he replied, simply, "Yes." I stood looking dumbly, not quite shocked, but corrected. "OK then," I finally stated, "go about your business." What was I to do? he had me cornered, until, to my amazement, I saw a vampire! Wow! Robert Pattinson had come to rescue me! I kinda wished it was that red-headed girl who was his sister in the movie, but still, I was happy, finally realizing that maybe vampires were the good guys, but nobody knew it. He jumped down from the profile pic of one "__*gAnGsTa*BoY*__." Don't ask me why, and I won't tell, let's put it that way.

He swooped in front of my new werewolf friend like a vampire-bat out of hell, and said, in as flat and emotionless a tone as possible, "Gary, step away from the kid." Wow! Robert Pattinson! Vampires! A werewolf named Gary! This story really has EVERYTHING, huh? So, Gary looks at RoPa, and sneers. "Look, dude. We all know you need to keep up appearances for the schoolgirls who love you so much, but stop buggin' me! Go on with yourself, when was the last time you saw a schoolgirl who was in love with a werewolf? Get out of here!" By this point, I had realized that Gary and RoPa were going to be going at it for a while, which many schoolgirls would love to have seen. So, I casually walked out of the scenario, and back to my page.

And that's the reason I'm cursing MySpace police. Yep. That's the only reason. It has nothing to do with the ticket I got while driving up to the "making an account" booth, which I'M NOT PAYING, by the way. I refuse. Nope, nada. Zip for them. Okay, fine, I'll pay.

Alright, new rule. For now on, I'm gonna write a review for every game I buy. Don't expect them to all be new games, but probably soon DS Chrono Trigger, SMT Devil Survivor and New Super Mario Bros. Yeah, I know they aren't all the newest games, but just because something's a little old doesn't mean it's not good.