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Says that dozens of strangers worked together to lift the bus off the woman. The woman died in the hospital, the baby was in critical condition but is showing signs of improvement.

Even though the woman died, it's nice to see there are some truly heroic people out there.

Fake movie posters from Cracked.com.:D

Having your face slowly pressed against one of these.

Portal Gun.

Who wouldn't do this?

A janitor was working the night shift at a skyscraper in New York. He was almost done with all the floors except the top one. He decides to take the elevator because he doesn't want to carry all his cleaning gear up the stairs. When the janitor finishes cleaning the top floor, he heads back to the elevator and pushes the button. Strangely, it was taking a while for the elevator doors to open. The only reason it could be taking so long is if the elevator was coming from one of the lower floors. But how could that be? The janitor was the only person in the building. Why would it have gone down? As the janitor was contemplating this, he heard some sort of gargling sound coming from the elevator.

Then the doors cracked open.

The next morning office workers were terrified to discover janitor in the elevator with both his eyes gouged out huddled in the corner. The blood on his thumbs suggests that the wounds were self inflicted.

[QUOTE="limpbizkit818"]

The parallel universe stuff gets me every time.

"Dude you just moved on electron on the other side of the universe!'

"Really"

"nah, I have no clue what I'm talking about"

Theokhoth

It's comforting to know that I'm a famous multi-billionaire who trains dragons for circus games in some universe.:D

And on the flip side, it's disconcerting to know that I'm a broke rapist in another.:(

Don't forget the universe where Hitler won World War II and you're the current leader of Germany.

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I really lol'd at #1.