The Quantum Zeno Effect

For years, scientists have been scouring the cosmos for some kind of bizarre hypothetical anti-gravity **** they're calling "dark energy". And they've had some success with it ... perhaps at the expense of our mortal souls.

To grossly simplify it, on a scale smaller than atoms, the quantum level, everything suddenly turns into a godda** circus. Quantum physics is to regular everyday physics as a David Lynch film is to a mainstream blockbuster. We're talking particles popping in and out of existence, being in two places at the same time, and generally acting like ****

Look at that particle. What an a***ole.

No doubt the strangest part is the Quantum Zeno effect, which points out that simply observing and measuring particles changes them (specifically, changing the rate at which they decay). How? No one knows. It appears to be the closest science has ever come to proving black magic exists.

Meet the Large Hadron Collider.

This is not only the largest particle accelerator ever built, it's the largest anything ever built. Originally set to come online in 2005, then delayed until September 2008, the LHC will fire very small objects around its 17-mile circumference at close to the speed of light, before smashing the **** out of them and watching what comes out.

The problem, of course, is that even the eggheads don't really know what's going to happen, which is sort of why they're doing it in the first place. That's also why a lawsuit was filed to put a stop to it. Scientists on the LHC project insist there is no danger, and predict that the resulting observations could revolutionize science and send us into a golden age of knowledge, in the event that we actually survive.

Risk Level: 3

Experts assure us that based on everything we know about science, the chances of doom are fairly slim. Experts also say LHC will change everything we know about science. So there is a certain chance that one of the brand new things they learn about the LHC is that the LHC has the ability turn the entire planet into a fine cloud of particles.

Ok, this is an article I found of the end of the world!

The Large Hadron Collider: End of the world, or God's own particle?

A bewildered Cole Moreton goes in search of the science behind the spin

Sunday, 7 September 2008

AP

The Cern cathedral of science may reveal the universe's secrets, or suck us into a black hole.

Yes, but what is it? That has been many people's reaction to the furore over the Large Hadron Collider, due to be switched on this Wednesday. The biggest, most expensive experiment in history is attracting both scientific hyperbole and hysteria. Some say it will reveal the universe's secrets and lead to the elusive Theory of Everything. A few fear that unleashing unimaginable power beneath the Swiss countryside will result in the end of the world. But how? And what do all these words mean?

Large

Is an understatement. A giant circular tunnel, with several loops, stretches for 27km under the land between France and Switzerland. One of its experimental chambers is bigger than the nave of Westminster Abbey.

Hadron

The name for one of the types of particle that make up an atom. These tiny bits of energy will be propelled by giant magnets around the tunnel circuit at almost the speed of light.

Collide

Is what they will do when they meet other hadrons being beamed in the opposite direction, at the same great speed. The resulting explosion will create 100,000 times more heat than the sun, apparently. Thankfully, it will only happen for a moment, in an area a billion times smaller than a speck of dust.

Cern

Pronounced "sern". The French acronym for the European Organisation for Nuclear Research, which built the £5bn collider. The money came from 20 countries, including Britain, which has played a leading role.

The Big Bang

Is what they are trying to recreate. Or rather what happened a trillionth of a second after the universe was created by an explosion, 13.7 billion years ago. For that tiny moment, it is believed everything was molten plasma. This cooled to create everything we see around us. The hope is that by remaking the moment, in miniature, the scientists will be able to see things that are invisible now.

The God Particle

Big name, very small thing; and the first great discovery they hope to make. It is believed we have only detected a quarter of the particles in everything. We don't, for example, know why things have mass. (To get a feeling for what that is, hit yourself over the head with an inflatable hammer, then a real one. The one that hurts has more mass.) In 1964 Professor Peter Higgs of Edinburgh University predicted an unseen particle that provided mass (its official name is a Higgs boson). The hope is it will be detected for the first time. Other possible revelations include so-called dark matter, which in theory "stretches through space like an invisible skeleton".

The Theory of Everything

The Holy Grail of science. A unifying theory providing one explanation for the forces at work in the natural world, from the nucleus of an atom to the movements of the planets. Sounds like alchemy to non-scientists, but some very respectable minds believe it is possible, and that the collider may show the way.

The End of the World

Some scientists, on the other hand, went to the European Court for Human Rights to try to stop the collider being turned on. They fear it may create a black hole - which would certainly violate our rights by sucking the planet into... well we don't really know. Professor Sir Chris Llewellyn Smith of Cern says: "The chance we produce a black hole is minuscule." Which is not all that reassuring. But he adds: "Even if we do, it can't swallow up the Earth." It would be too small, and disappear in moments. In any case, they will only send the hadrons in one direction this week. The collisions start in October. Until then, at least, we're not all doomed.

I don't want to die !!!! Stop the thing people! It is too dangerous!

Hey everyone, I made a new sig a little while ago and I would like to know your opinions! I made it on photobucket :lol:

So what do you think???

Here's a conduit fan art I created. Hope you like it!

What do you think?

I finnaly made something of good. I made new userbars and new sigs for my union. Well actually I really edited them...

Here they are :

HERE ARE THE ORIGIALS:

Here are the edited sigs:

And here is the original:

So, do you think I did a good job?

.

Here is a collection of skeleton jokes for you to enjoy :

• Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
  A: No body
• Q: What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
  A: Bone appetit !
• Q: When does a skeleton laugh?
  A: When something tickles his funny bone.
• Q: Why didn't the skeleton dance at the Halloween party?
  A: It had no body to dance with.
• Q: What type of art do skeletons like?
  A: Skull tures
• Q: What did the skeleton say when his brother told a lie?
  A: You can't fool me, I can see right through you.
• Q: What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
  A: I'm bone to be wild!
• Q: Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
  A: He had no body to dance with.
• Q: What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day?
  A: Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.
• Q: Who was the most famous skeleton detective?
  A: Sherlock Bones.
• Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton?
  A: Napoleon bone-apart
• Q: What instrument do skeletons play?
  A: Trom-BONE.
• Q: What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?
  A: Spare ribs!!!
• Q: When does a skeleton laugh?
  A: When something tickles his funny bone.
• Q: Why didn't the skeleton eat the cafeteria food?
  A: Because he didn't have the stomach for it!
• Q: Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road?
  A: He didn't have the guts.
• Q: Why are skeletons usually so calm ?
  A: Nothing gets under their skin !
• Q: Why do skeletons hate winter?
  A: Beacuse the cold goes right through them !
• Q: Why are graveyards so noisy ?
  A: Beacause of all the coffin !
• Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the party ?
  A: He had no body to go with !
• Q: What happened when the skeletons rode pogo sticks ?
  A: They had a rattling good time !
• Q: Why did the skeleton go to hospital ?
  A: To have his ghoul stones removed !
• Q: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain ?
  A: He could feel it in his bones !
• Q: What's a skeleton's favourite musical instrument ?
  A: A trom-bone !
• Q: How do skeletons call their friends ?
  A: On the telebone !
• Q: What do you call a skeleton who won't get up in the mornings ?
  A: Lazy bones !
• Q: What do boney people use to get into their homes ?
  A: Skeleton keys !
• Q: What do you call a skeleton who acts in Westerns ?
  A: Skint Eastwood !
• Q: What happened to the boat that sank in the sea full of piranha fish ?
  A: It came back with a skeleton crew !
• Q: What do you call a skeleton snake ?
  A: A rattler !
• Q: What is a skeletons like to drink milk ?
  A: Milk - it's so good for the bones !
• Q: Why did the skeleton stay out in the snow all night ?
  A: He was a numbskull !
• Q: What do you call a stupid skeleton ?
  A: Bonehead !
• Q: What happened to the skeleton who stayed by the fire too long ?
  A: He became bone dry !
• Q: What happened to the lazy skeleton ?
  A: He was bone idle !
• Q: Why did the skeleton pupil stay late at school ?
  A: He was boning up for his exams !
• Q: What sort of soup do skeletons like ?
  A: One with plenty of body in it !
• Q: Why did the skeleton run up a tree ?
  A: Because a dog was after his bones !
• Q: What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend ?
  A: I love every bone in your body !
• Q: Why wasn't the naughty skeleton afraid of the police ?
  A: Because he knew they couldn't pin anything on him !
• Q: How do skeletons get their mail ?
  A: By bony express !
• Q: Why don't skeletons play music in church ?
  A: They have no organs !
• Q: What kind of plate does a skeleton eat off ?
  A: Bone china !
• Q: Why do skeletons hate winter ?
  A: Because the wind just goes straight through them !
• Q: What's a skeleton's favourite pop group ?
  A: Boney M !
• Q: What do you do if you see a skeleton running across a road ?
  A: Jump out of your skin and join him !
• Q: What did the old skeleton complain of ?
  A: Aching bones !
• Q: What is a skeleton ?
  A: Somebody on a diet who forgot to say "when" !
• Q: What happened to the skeleton that was attacked by a dog ?
  A: He ran off with some bones and didn't leave him with a leg to stand on !
• Q: Why are skeletons so calm ?
  A: Because nothing gets under their skin !
• Q: What do you call a skeleton that is always telling lies ?
  A: A boney phoney !
• Q: Why didn't the skeleton want to play football ?
  A: Because his heart wasn't in it !
• Q: What happened to the skeleton who went to a party ?
  A: All the others used him as a coat rack !
• Q: What do you call a skeleton who presses the door bell ?
  A: A dead ringer !
• Q: When does a skeleton laugh?
  A: When something tickles his funny bone.
• Q: How did skeletons send their letters in the old days?
  A: By bony express!
• Q: How do you make a skeleton laugh?
  A: Tickle his funny bone!

LAME!

Here is a collection of monster jokes for you to enjoy

• Q: What's a monster's favorite play?
  A: Romeo and Ghouliet
• Q: Why did the monster eat a light bulb?
  A: Because he was in need of a light snack
• Q: What kind of cereal do monsters eat?
  A: Ghost-Toasties
• Q: Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
  A: Because everyone was a goblin!
• Q: Do monsters eat popcorn with their fingers?
  A: NO, they eat the fingers separately.
• Q: What do you do with a green monster?
  A: Wait until it ripens.
• Q: What is a monster's favorite food?
  A: Ghoul scout cookies.
• Q: What's a monsters favorite bean?
  A: A human bean.
• Q: How do you keep a monster from biting his nails?
  A: Replace the nails with screws.
• Q: What type of monster really loves dance music?
  A: The boogieman!
• Q: What is a monster's favorite food?
  A: Ghoul scout cookies.
• Q: What position does a monster play on the soccer team?
  A: Ghoulie.
• Q: What kind of hot dogs do monsters like best?
  A: Hallowieners.
• Q: What's the name of the book of socially prominent monsters?
  A: The Book of who's Boo.
• Q: Why are monsters forgetful ?
  A: Because everything goes in one ear and out the others !
• Q: Why did the monster knit herself three socks ?
  A: Because she grew another foot !
• Q: What is the difference between a huge smelly monster and a sweet ?
  A: People like sweets !
• Q: What has a purple spotted body, ten hairy legs and big eyes on stalks?
  A: I don't know either but there is one crawling up your leg !
• Q: What do you say when you meet a two headed monster ?
  A: Hello, hello !
• Q: What is the best way to speak to a monster ?
  A: From a long way away !
• Q: What is big, red and prickly, has three eyes and eats rocks ?
  A: A big, red, prickly three eyed rock eater !
• Q: What kind of monster has the best hearing ?
  A: The eeriest !
• Q: How you can tell if you have had a monster in your fridge ?
  A: It leaves footprints in the butter !
• Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
  A: His ghoul friend.
• Q: Why are monsters covered in wrinkles?
  A: Have you ever tried to iron a monster !
• Q: Why are monsters green ?
  A: Because they didn't take their travel sickness pills !
• Q: Why do monsters wear glasses ?
  A: So they don't bump into other monsters !
• Q: What do you get if a huge hairy monster steps on Batman and Robin ?
  A: Flatman and Ribbon !
• Q: What time is it when a monster sits on your car ?
  A: Time to get a new one !
• Q: What game do monsters play with ants ?
  A: Squash !
• Q: Did you hear about the monster who had eight arms ?
  A: He said they came in handy !
• Q: How do you keep an ugly monster in suspense ?
  A: I'll tell you tomorrow !
• Q: How do you greet a three headed monster ?
  A: Hello, hello, hello !
• Q: What is a sea monster's favourite dish ?
  A: Fish and ships !
• Q: Monster: Where do fleas go in winter ?
  A: Werewolf: Search me !
• Q: Why are monsters forgetful ?
  A: Because everything goes in one ear and out the others !
• Q: Why did the monster knit herself three socks ?
  A: Because she grew another foot !
• Q: What is the difference between a huge smelly monster and a sweet ?
  A: People like sweets !
• Q: What has a purple spotted body, ten hairy legs and big eyes on stalks?
  A: i don't know either but there is one crawling up your leg !
• Q: What do you say when you meet a two headed monster ?
  A: Hello hello !
• Q: What is the best way to speak to a monster ?
  A: From a long way away !
• Q: What is big, red and prickly, has three eyes and eats rocks ?
  A: A big, red, prickly three eyed rock eater !
• Q: Why are monsters green ?
  A: Because they didn't take their travel sickness pills !
• Q: Why do monsters wear glasses ?
  A: So they don't bump into other monsters !
• Q: What kind of monster has the best hearing ?
  A: The eeriest !
• Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
  A: His ghoul friend.
• Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
  A: His ghoul friend.
• Q: What did Dr. Frankenstein get when he put his goldfish's brain in the body of his dog?
  A: I don't know, but it's great at chasing submarines.
• Q: What did the grandfather monster say to his grandson when they hadn't seen each other for quite awhile?
  A: You gruesome.

HOW LAME WAS THAT?

Here is a collection of ghost jokes for you to enjoy :

• Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
  A: Dayscare centers.
• Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
  A: Bamboo.
• Q: What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
  A: Boo boos.
• Q: What does a ghost eat for lunch?
  A: A BOO-logna sandwich.
• Q: Where do ghosts go on vacation?
  A: The Eerie canal, Lake Eerie ! or Mali-Boo
• Q: What's a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival?
  A: The roller ghoster.
• Q: Where do ghosts buy their food?
  A: At the ghost-ery store.
• Q: Where do ghosts mail their letters?
  A: At the ghost office.
• Q: What's a ghosts favorite fruit?
  A: Booberries.
• Q: What kind of street does a ghost like best ?
  A: A dead end !
• Q: What did the baby ghost eat for dinner ?
  A: A boo-loney sandwich !
• Q: What do you call a ghost's mother and father ?
  A: Transparents !
• Q: How did the ghost song and dance act make a living ?
  A: By appearing in television spooktaculars !
• Q: What are little ghosts dressed in when it rains ?
  A: Boo-ts and ghoul-oshes !
• Q: Why are ghosts bad at telling lies ?
  A: Because you can see right through them !
• Q: What did the ghost teacher say to her ****?
  A: Watch the board and I'll go through it again !
• Q: How do ghosts learn songs ?
  A: They read the sheet music !
• Q: What is a ghost's favourite day of the week ?
  A: Frightday !
• Q: Where do ghosts get an education ?
  A: High sghoul !
• Q: What did the polite ghost say to her son ?
  A: Don't spook until your spooken to !
• Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
  A: Hoblin Goblin.
• Q: What do you call a prehistoric ghost ?
  A: A terror-dactyl !
• Q: Who speaks at the ghosts' press conference ?
  A: The spooksperson !
• Q: What should you say when you meet a ghost?
  A: Howdo you boo, sir?
• Q: What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
  A: Boo boo's!
• Q: Why did the ghost go to the amusement park?
  A: He wanted to go on a rollerghoster !
• Q: Who's the most important member of a ghost's football team ?
  A: The ghoulie !
• Q: When does a ghost have breakfast?
  A: In the moaning.
• Q: What's a ghost's favorite breakfast?
  A: Ghost toasties with booberries, Scream of Wheat or Dreaded wheat !
• Q: What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
  A: Coffee with scream and sugar.
• Q: What is a ghost's favourite dessert ?
  A: Boo-Berry pie with I-scream !
• Q: What do ghosts dance to ?
  A: Soul music !
• Q: Where do ghosts live ?
  A: In a terrortory !
• Q: What color are ghosts?
  A: BOOOO!
• Q: When do ghosts usually appear ?
  A: Just before someone screams !
• Q: What's a ghost's favorite ride?
  A: A roller ghoster!
• Q: What do ghosts have in the seats of their cars ?
  A: Sheet belts !
• Q: What do ghosts eat for dinner ?
  A: Ghoulash !
• Q: What kind of ghost has the best hearing ?
  A: The eeriest !
• Q: What does a ghost swim in?
  A: The Dead sea!
• Q: Who did the ghost invite to his party?
  A: Anyone he could dig up!
• Q: Who was the famous ghost detective?
  A: Sherlock Moans.
• Q: What vehicle does a kid ghost like to ride?
  A: A boocycle.
• Q: Why did the ghost go to the doctor?
  A: To get a Booster shot.
• Q: What do ghosts eat for breakfast
  A: Dreaded wheat.
• Q: How did the ghost patch his sheet?
  A: With a pumpkin patch.
• Q: What is a ghost's favorite bird?
  A: scare crow!
• Q: What does a ghost put on his cereal in the morning?
  A: Boonanas and Booberries.
• Q: What kind of cars do ghosts drive?
  A: Boo--icks.
• Q: What's a ghosts favorite Broadway play?
  A: phantom of the opera!
• Q: What did one ghost say to another?
  A: Do you believe in people?
• Q: What did one ghost say to another?
  A: Do you believe in people?
• Q: What do ghosts eat for dinner?
  A: Spook-ghetti.
• Q: What is a ghost favorite article of clothing?
  A: Boojeans.
• Q: Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
  A: Anywhere where he can boo-gie.
• Q: What time is it when a ghost haunts your house?
  A: Time to move to a new house!
• Q: What's a ghosts favorite desert?
  A: Boo-berry pie & I scream.
• Q: What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
  A: Whipped scream.
• Q: What did the mother ghost say to the baby ghost ?
  A: Put your boos and shocks on !
• Q: Why are ghosts cowards ?
  A: Because they've got no guts !
• Q: What story do little ghosts like to hear at bedtime?
  A: Ghoul delocks & the 3 scares.
• Q: What is a ghost's favorite party game?
  A: Hide-and-go-shriek.
• Q: What do ghosts say when something is really neat?
  A: Ghoul
• Q: Why did the ghost rush home from school?
  A: To watch an after-ghoul special on TV.
• Q: What do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, poodle, & a ghost?
  A: A cocker-poodle-boo!
• Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
  A: He is mist.
• Q: Who protects the shores where spirits live?
  A: The Ghost Guard!
• Q: What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
  A: You look boo-tiful tonight.
• Q: Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
  A: So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
• Q: Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
  A: He didn't have a haunting license.
• Q: What did one ghost say to the other when they fell down?
  A: I got a booo booo.
• Q: What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
  A: A boo-tie.
• Q: What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?
  A: mas-scare-
  
• Q: Why do ghosts and demons get along so well?
  A: Because demons are a ghosts best friend.
• Q: Who did the ghost go with to the Halloween party?
  A: With No-Body!
• Q: What do baby ghosts wear on their feet?
  A: Boo-ties!
• Q: What did the little ghost have in his rock collection?
  A: Tombstones
• Q: What do ghosts mail home while on vacation?
  A: Ghostcards.
• Q: What do ghosts do when they're in hospital ?
  A: They talk about their apparitions !
• Q: What's the 1st thing ghosts do when they get in a car?
  A: They boo-kle their seatbelts

That was lame!