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[QUOTE="HillyBilly"]So in a course of a day you loose all romantic feelings for her?Notsogr8oneThis seems crazy to me.
Me too. I get the feeling that you're not 16 either.
Just be honest and tell her it was about you. If you say it's something she did, she'll think that maybe she can change or regret things that have happened in the past.
I once had a situation like this with one my friends (I'm a girl btw). We both had feelings for each other at some point, but I guess his faded quickly. He tried to stomp out my feelings by being mean to me but it only made things worse. I probably still have feelings for him, but I just can't get over it. We'll never be as good of friends as we used to be.
[QUOTE="HillyBilly"]So in a course of a day you loose all romantic feelings for her?Notsogr8oneThis seems crazy to me.
It can happen if there is a serious reason but in this case yea, thats nuts.
Anyway tc, if you want to stay friends, tell her the truth.
If you want to get the action then screw the truth.
I had this sort of thing happen to me once. Long story on that one.
I think it would be best if you told her, but still did your best to stay friends with her. That sounds easy in theory, but might be tough in practice. Honesty is the best policy here and you'll need to stick with it. Just don't let it ruin your friendships.
Basically: Tell the truth, and stress the importance of your friendship, how you want it to continue regardless.
Tell her the truth.Genetic_Code
^^This^^
Also, if it was all your fault things didn't go well back then I'd venture a guess that you still have feelings for her as well, you just don't want to admit it.
This is why it sucks to fall for a friend because if things don't work out, you lose a good friendship. You should tell her the truth.CommanderShirohehe...now you tell me...
i seriously can't look my best friend in the eye anymore since i told her and she shot me down :cry:
enough thread hijacking though, i agree with the quoted poster.
Im all about honesty, but i think lying to her will make her life better and make her happier...RabidChocobo1
Lie to her and say what exactly?
Anyway, I'm saying you should just be upfront and honest. If you dont know why it happened, then you dont know.
[QUOTE="RabidChocobo1"]Im all about honesty, but i think lying to her will make her life better and make her happier...HillyBilly
Lie to her and say what exactly?
Anyway, I'm saying you should just be upfront and honest. If you dont know why it happened, then you dont know.
yes, but if i say it wasnt her, and that it was completely me, and i dont know WHY, then she might have hope that we will be together in the future, and she might wait years for me to fall for her again, and i might be over her, and i dont want to do that to her... i cant tell her that it might never happen, but i doubt it, and i dont want to get her hopes up..
Sounds to me like you just felt disgusted by the fact that you had become boyfriend and girlfriend after knowing her for so long. You say now that you know you'll never feel that way about her again, but how can you be so sure? If you go back to being friends, there's a fair chance that one day you'll feel the same way again.
Just don't get freaked out by what either of you said - you're both still exactly the same as before that moment. Tell her that it was your fault, and that things just feel awkward between you now, and you want to go back to being friends. Hopefully she'll understand. Just don't keep apologising because that's going to make her feel stupid.
I really hope you don't end up losing her as a friend, because it sounds like she's important to you.
Sounds to me like you just felt disgusted by the fact that you had become boyfriend and girlfriend after knowing her for so long. You say now that you know you'll never feel that way about her again, but how can you be so sure? If you go back to being friends, there's a fair chance that one day you'll feel the same way again.
Just don't get freaked out by what either of you said - you're both still exactly the same as before that moment. Tell her that it was your fault, and that things just feel awkward between you now, and you want to go back to being friends. Hopefully she'll understand. Just don't keep apologising because that's going to make her feel stupid.
I really hope you don't end up losing her as a friend, because it sounds like she's important to you.
jimmyjammer69
[QUOTE="Raged_Soulja"]Touch her shoulder.kingyotoX
this.
lol, what happened to being suspended for saying that?
[QUOTE="RabidChocobo1"][QUOTE="kingyotoX"][QUOTE="Raged_Soulja"]Touch her shoulder.kingyotoX
this.
lol, what happened to being suspended for saying that?
for what saying "touch her shoulder" or saying "this".
lol, saying touch her shoulder...yes that rule was very real, ask any of the old users
[QUOTE="jimmyjammer69"]Sounds to me like you just felt disgusted by the fact that you had become boyfriend and girlfriend after knowing her for so long. You say now that you know you'll never feel that way about her again, but how can you be so sure? If you go back to being friends, there's a fair chance that one day you'll feel the same way again.
Just don't get freaked out by what either of you said - you're both still exactly the same as before that moment. Tell her that it was your fault, and that things just feel awkward between you now, and you want to go back to being friends. Hopefully she'll understand. Just don't keep apologising because that's going to make her feel stupid.
I really hope you don't end up losing her as a friend, because it sounds like she's important to you.
RabidChocobo1
[QUOTE="RabidChocobo1"][QUOTE="jimmyjammer69"]Sounds to me like you just felt disgusted by the fact that you had become boyfriend and girlfriend after knowing her for so long. You say now that you know you'll never feel that way about her again, but how can you be so sure? If you go back to being friends, there's a fair chance that one day you'll feel the same way again.
Just don't get freaked out by what either of you said - you're both still exactly the same as before that moment. Tell her that it was your fault, and that things just feel awkward between you now, and you want to go back to being friends. Hopefully she'll understand. Just don't keep apologising because that's going to make her feel stupid.
I really hope you don't end up losing her as a friend, because it sounds like she's important to you.
Drathyl
Things will NOT be back to normal, ever again. Tell her the honest truth; just don't expect what you already got before.Dethshoot
I dont expect to...we both said that half of our actions were driven by romance, and now that it's done, it will change...but there WAS a time with no romance, just being best friends, and that time was awesome too because we were hella close but could still talk about boy and girl problems
your fool if you think shes gonna wait "years" for you to "fall for her again"
i think for some reason you realised that she was pretty much in your pocket, and you got scared. scared that if you do date her, in the end it would probably end badly(most do).
but it can work out in the end, i've seen it happen with a friend of mine.
i say, date her, and i bet you 5 bucks you'll get feeling for her again almost instantly. but you probably wont, so, just tell her that you realised you dont want this to be anymore than a friendship BECAUSE you value the friendship so much. that if you guys were more than friends, it might end up very akward in the end and you wouldnt be the same. she might be sad, but after a day of thinking, she'll be happy you said it.
I have NO friggin idea what happened, seriously, im wondering if i should see a psychiatrist. One night, im telling her all my feelings, being like an inch away from saying im IN love with her, (but i didnt because that would seem a little too crazy) and the next day, i dont feel those feeligns...seriously, i actually tried to FORCE those feelings, but they wouldnt come, and i felt so damn bad and told her im sorry a thousand times..
Im all about honesty, but i think lying to her will make her life better and make her happier...RabidChocobo1
Simple. You were emotionally attracted to the pursuit, not the person. It was the flirting and the very fact that you had to keep your feelings bottled up that created the false feelings of 'love.' This is not uncommon. It's the reason that most people find the initial stages of a relationship and the pursuit much more exciting than a relationship that has become comfortable after many years together.
uh... be with her, you are obviously just jittery about HAVING something, you are setting yourself up for failure by " not feeling for her" the second you lose her totally you will miss her, just take my word for it and tell her that you feel that way, even if you dont now, the security in the relationship will be goodgarrett_duffman
[QUOTE="garrett_duffman"]uh... be with her, you are obviously just jittery about HAVING something, you are setting yourself up for failure by " not feeling for her" the second you lose her totally you will miss her, just take my word for it and tell her that you feel that way, even if you dont now, the security in the relationship will be goodRabidChocobo1
you should really read my post
and i feel sorry for you.
:P
I have NO friggin idea what happened, seriously, im wondering if i should see a psychiatrist. One night, im telling her all my feelings, being like an inch away from saying im IN love with her, (but i didnt because that would seem a little too crazy) and the next day, i dont feel those feeligns...seriously, i actually tried to FORCE those feelings, but they wouldnt come, and i felt so damn bad and told her im sorry a thousand times..
Im all about honesty, but i think lying to her will make her life better and make her happier...RabidChocobo1
Maybe you have commitment issues? That could be the cause. You'd probably rather have something not so meaningful-just a thought though.
[QUOTE="garrett_duffman"]uh... be with her, you are obviously just jittery about HAVING something, you are setting yourself up for failure by " not feeling for her" the second you lose her totally you will miss her, just take my word for it and tell her that you feel that way, even if you dont now, the security in the relationship will be goodRabidChocobo1
"duuuuude" you are being a little kid, if you honestly think that you are going to feel the exact same feeling every day with the same person in a relationship you are VERY mistaken, one day you are going to feel for her again, it might not be tommarow, might not be the next day, but chances are, it will be too late for you then, so... whatever
[QUOTE="RabidChocobo1"]I have NO friggin idea what happened, seriously, im wondering if i should see a psychiatrist. One night, im telling her all my feelings, being like an inch away from saying im IN love with her, (but i didnt because that would seem a little too crazy) and the next day, i dont feel those feeligns...seriously, i actually tried to FORCE those feelings, but they wouldnt come, and i felt so damn bad and told her im sorry a thousand times..
Im all about honesty, but i think lying to her will make her life better and make her happier...Aclar00_basic
Maybe you have commitment issues? That could be the cause. You'd probably rather have something not so meaningful-just a thought though.
im not a fling kind of guy...id rather find the one right girl then be with her for the rest of my life...im very picky also...
Well....
My GS,OT Advice: Grab Ass + Reaction = Love
My personal advice: Tell her the truth, man. I've been in a similar situation (although it didn't go over in the course of a day xP) and just letting the truth out really shows who people really are. If she cared about you even a little, she wouldn't mind hearing it.
Well....
My GS,OT Advice: Grab Ass + Reaction = Love
My personal advice: Tell her the truth, man. I've been in a similar situation (although it didn't go over in the course of a day xP) and just letting the truth out really shows who people really are. If she cared about you even a little, she wouldn't mind hearing it.
kylekatarn10
[QUOTE="Aclar00_basic"][QUOTE="RabidChocobo1"]I have NO friggin idea what happened, seriously, im wondering if i should see a psychiatrist. One night, im telling her all my feelings, being like an inch away from saying im IN love with her, (but i didnt because that would seem a little too crazy) and the next day, i dont feel those feeligns...seriously, i actually tried to FORCE those feelings, but they wouldnt come, and i felt so damn bad and told her im sorry a thousand times..
Im all about honesty, but i think lying to her will make her life better and make her happier...RabidChocobo1
Maybe you have commitment issues? That could be the cause. You'd probably rather have something not so meaningful-just a thought though.
im not a fling kind of guy...id rather find the one right girl then be with her for the rest of my life...im very picky also...
That would be sad. 1 girl for the whole of your life? It sounds romantic, but really it's not.
I guess by the 1 girl comment, that this is your first girlfriend. With my first girlfriend, I told her how I felt and then felt stupid afterwards because I didn't know how to act around her after those words (and because of what a few friends thought of her). I ended up avoiding her and broke up with her about 2 weeks later. The whole thing was nasty for both of us and I chucked away what could have been good for both of us.
If you approach every potential relationship with the idea that it's only valuable if it's forever, you're going to miss out on a lot of happiness. Like someone said earlier, this girl won't be waiting around forever for you, so stop looking for someone to blame if it doesn't work out.
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