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Travo_basic

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#1 Travo_basic
Member since 2003 • 38751 Posts

In the US we seem to have many unspoken 'rules' about eye contact. How important is eye contact with you? Do you think it's ok to look at something else while talking? Is the importance of eye contact different depending on the staus of the other person?

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aaronmullan

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#2 aaronmullan
Member since 2004 • 33426 Posts
If you can't look someone in the eye you aren't a man!
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Big_player

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#3 Big_player
Member since 2004 • 6187 Posts
I'm often looking elsewhere while talking to someone, I get extremely uncomfortable during long eye contact.
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EMOEVOLUTION

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#4 EMOEVOLUTION
Member since 2008 • 8998 Posts

They are not unspoken rules. It's called culture, but what you're describing is actually more related to biology than culture. All human societies use eye contact. The reason for this is body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

And no eye contact does not change based on the status of a person in America. In some other countries it may but it does not here. It's expected and required as a sign of respect for the person you're talking too. If you shy away from eye contact it usuasly indicates you're an insecure person.

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orazinac

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#5 orazinac
Member since 2006 • 596 Posts
Monkeys consider eye contact offensive, and will rip your spine out if you do so.
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Tuky06

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#6 Tuky06
Member since 2007 • 5026 Posts
I just let people look at whatever they want to, sadly, some girls don't share this way of thinking.
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shoeman12

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#7 shoeman12
Member since 2005 • 8744 Posts
i feel odd and uncomfortable if someone keeps eye contact with me when we're talking. some is fine but not for the whole converstation.
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Hungry_bunny

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#8 Hungry_bunny
Member since 2006 • 14293 Posts
I don't care, sometimes I look people in the eyes and sometimes I don't, has nothing to do with being nervous or anything like that... but when you're talking for a long time you kinda want to move your neck around sometimes.
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Skylarkell

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#9 Skylarkell
Member since 2007 • 2797 Posts

I sometimes like eye contact but after long periods it might be werid.

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TheBeast789

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#10 TheBeast789
Member since 2008 • 1414 Posts
i dont like it when they are flat out staring at me when i talk, but i hate it even more if they just dont look at me.
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194197844077667059316682358889

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#11 194197844077667059316682358889
Member since 2003 • 49173 Posts

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

EMOEVOLUTION
I disagree mightily
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HardQuor

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#12 HardQuor
Member since 2007 • 1282 Posts
If you can't look someone in the eye you aren't a man!aaronmullan
That's funny, because i remember a study that showed that men almost never made eye contact when speaking to one another, while women almost never broke eye contact when speaking to one another.
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orazinac

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#13 orazinac
Member since 2006 • 596 Posts
[QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

xaos

I disagree mightily

Think about this:

Would you be more emotionally scarred if I said I would whip out my penis opposed to if I actually whipped out my penis

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hoola

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#14 hoola
Member since 2004 • 6422 Posts
I lose concentration when i look into someone elses eyes while i am talking to them so i am alway slooking off to the sides at a wall or picture. I have been trying harder to look into peoples eyes more often if they look at me while they talk. When i look into their eyes it is like getting lost in a movie, i ignore everything going on around me and that includes what the people are saying so i try to make only a little bit of eye contact.
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194197844077667059316682358889

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#15 194197844077667059316682358889
Member since 2003 • 49173 Posts
[QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

orazinac

I disagree mightily

Think about this:

Would you be more emotionally scarred if I said I would whip out my penis opposed to if I actually whipped out my penis

Think about this: can you explain quantum mechanics via body language? Also, you chose the wrong gay guy to try and emotionally scar :(
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SlorgieNel

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#16 SlorgieNel
Member since 2005 • 1704 Posts

I used to really have problems looking people in the eye but then my dad told me that if I couldn't learn how to do it, I'd never get a job. So now I have no problem staring anyone down.

I think it's quite important though, especially in job interviews. It's also just a good skill to have in general.

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darksword1123

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#17 darksword1123
Member since 2004 • 30121 Posts
It's important to look someone in the eyes when your talking to them.
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battlefront23

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#18 battlefront23
Member since 2006 • 12625 Posts
It depends. If something looks away for a second or so, then I'm not bothered. But the other day I was talking to one of my friends in the coffee shop at my school, and she kept on looking outside. It's not normal of her to do that and it was really annoying! :x
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ish27

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#19 ish27
Member since 2006 • 1003 Posts
Being of Indian heritage, I find it really awkward looking into someone's eyes who is older than me, even though making eye contact means that you are paying attention.
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KOTORkicker

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#20 KOTORkicker
Member since 2007 • 4595 Posts
[QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

xaos

I disagree mightily

I second xaos.

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_LiquidFlame_

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#21 _LiquidFlame_
Member since 2007 • 13736 Posts
The only people I don't look in the eye are people I have a crush on. :P
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auron_16

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#22 auron_16
Member since 2008 • 4062 Posts
i deliberately look 'em in the eye, to show them i'm serious. and so they can see the laser bolts ready to fire at the first sign of danger.
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Curlyfrii87

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#23 Curlyfrii87
Member since 2004 • 15057 Posts
Rather the eyes than have someone stare at my nose or something the whole conversation!
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orazinac

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#24 orazinac
Member since 2006 • 596 Posts
[QUOTE="orazinac"][QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

xaos

I disagree mightily

Think about this:

Would you be more emotionally scarred if I said I would whip out my penis opposed to if I actually whipped out my penis

Think about this: can you explain quantum mechanics via body language? Also, you chose the wrong gay guy to try and emotionally scar :(

How come I always get a gay guy when I whip my penis out?
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CleanPlayer

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#25 CleanPlayer
Member since 2008 • 9822 Posts
I can tell what people are think when I look them in the eye. Says a lot about a person.
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orazinac

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#26 orazinac
Member since 2006 • 596 Posts
I can tell what people are think when I look them in the eye. Says a lot about a person. CleanPlayer
You must be psychic if you can tell what people are think.
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HardQuor

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#27 HardQuor
Member since 2007 • 1282 Posts
[QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

KOTORkicker

I disagree mightily

I second xaos.

Try getting a good job at an interview without making eye contact.
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Travo_basic

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#28 Travo_basic
Member since 2003 • 38751 Posts

I can tell what people are think when I look them in the eye. Says a lot about a person. CleanPlayer

What am I thinking about now?

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orazinac

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#29 orazinac
Member since 2006 • 596 Posts

[QUOTE="CleanPlayer"]I can tell what people are think when I look them in the eye. Says a lot about a person. Travo_basic

What am I thinking about now?

Obviously about Tool's album, Aenima

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Dark_Knight6

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#30 Dark_Knight6
Member since 2006 • 16619 Posts
I normally attempt to make eye contact and can do it pretty well. But if I'm intimidated by someone or find them to be attractive, I have trouble keeping eye contact with them during conversations. :?
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Premier1101

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#31 Premier1101
Member since 2008 • 13515 Posts
Eye contact is essential in america
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Travo_basic

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#32 Travo_basic
Member since 2003 • 38751 Posts
I'm deaf in my left ear and this usually doesn't pose a problem. Sometimes, if I'm in a loud room, I have to turn my head to hear someone and break eye contact. I've been accused of ignoring people because of this.
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mrbojangles25

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#33 mrbojangles25
Member since 2005 • 60881 Posts

Monkeys consider eye contact offensive, and will rip your spine out if you do so. orazinac

thats when you tell the girl to have her boobs stop staring at your eyes.

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-TheSecondSign-

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#34 -TheSecondSign-
Member since 2007 • 9303 Posts

I like it when people look at me when I'm talking to them.

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LJS9502_basic

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#35 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180251 Posts
Eye contact should not be forced....but someone avoiding eye contact is usually hiding something. Then too....eye contact with someone special is a good thing. Not that I believe in love or anything like that.:x
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Premier1101

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#36 Premier1101
Member since 2008 • 13515 Posts

Eye contact should not be forced....but someone avoiding eye contact is usually hiding something. Then too....eye contact with someone special is a good thing. Not that I believe in love or anything like that.:xLJS9502_basic

just lust :P

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LJS9502_basic

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#37 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180251 Posts

[QUOTE="LJS9502_basic"]Eye contact should not be forced....but someone avoiding eye contact is usually hiding something. Then too....eye contact with someone special is a good thing. Not that I believe in love or anything like that.:xPremier1101

just lust :P

It does indeed exist....
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Premier1101

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#38 Premier1101
Member since 2008 • 13515 Posts
[QUOTE="Premier1101"]

[QUOTE="LJS9502_basic"]Eye contact should not be forced....but someone avoiding eye contact is usually hiding something. Then too....eye contact with someone special is a good thing. Not that I believe in love or anything like that.:xLJS9502_basic

just lust :P

It does indeed exist....

ever get in trouble because of that?

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muffincakes87

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#39 muffincakes87
Member since 2008 • 3913 Posts

For me personal.

I make eye contact with mostly everyone.

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jubino

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#40 jubino
Member since 2005 • 6265 Posts
Eye contact is good for like job interviews and dates, but you definitely don't want to just stare the person down. They'll think you a bit creepy.
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LJS9502_basic

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#41 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180251 Posts

ever get in trouble because of that?

Premier1101
Me? In trouble? What do you mean? I has control. Besides....I meant lust exists in response to my initial comment that I don't believe in love.:P
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mrbojangles25

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#42 mrbojangles25
Member since 2005 • 60881 Posts

Eye contact is good for like job interviews and dates, but you definitely don't want to just stare the person down. They'll think you a bit creepy.jubino

thats my problem. I dont know if I have intense eyes or what, because I totally dont (though they are lovely!), but I think people get intimidated when I make eye contact with them.

Its like, I dont make eye contact they think I am a fat, antisocial buffoon...yet when I do make contact with them, I am a bully.

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kingdre

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#43 kingdre
Member since 2005 • 9456 Posts
I've never really noticed, but if I'm saying something important, a little eye contact every now and then shows that the person I'm talking to is still listening and interested. I'd do the same if I were the one being spoken to.
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deactivated-6016f2513d412

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#44 deactivated-6016f2513d412
Member since 2007 • 20414 Posts
I rarely make eye contact. It just weirds me out. It doesn't matter with whom I'm speaking, either. I could be talking to another woman or a man, I could be talking to a best friend or an acquaintance, etc. I've just never been a big fan of it. I usually look at another part of the person's face so they know that I'm listening even though I'm not staring directly at their eyes. Maybe that bothers some people, but I just can't help it.
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jubino

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#45 jubino
Member since 2005 • 6265 Posts

[QUOTE="jubino"]Eye contact is good for like job interviews and dates, but you definitely don't want to just stare the person down. They'll think you a bit creepy.mrbojangles25

thats my problem. I dont know if I have intense eyes or what, because I totally dont (though they are lovely!), but I think people get intimidated when I make eye contact with them.

Its like, I dont make eye contact they think I am a fat, antisocial buffoon...yet when I do make contact with them, I am a bully.

I've gotten that before too. At least when I'm not wearing my glasses, which the light glares off of so you can't really tell if I'm looking right at you anyway :P. I tend to wear them all the time now, because I'm pretty vain and I have dark rings under my eyes. No idea why though. I've had them since I was a kid. I went without them one day in high school, and some kid told me I looked like a racoon without them, and my teachers thought I was sleep deprived. Our lunch lady told me I should be more careful in football, cuz it looked like I had two black eyes. Oh well.

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StrawberryHill

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#46 StrawberryHill
Member since 2008 • 5321 Posts
I think it's important to make eye contact when communicating with someone.
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IcE-Fu-

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#47 IcE-Fu-
Member since 2005 • 3590 Posts

I always try to do it when I catch myself not looking in other people's eyes. So I'm guessing I do find it important because it shows respect and confidence. People have called me shy because I usually don't show eye contact so I try to do it as much as I can nowadays

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Premier1101

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#48 Premier1101
Member since 2008 • 13515 Posts
[QUOTE="Premier1101"]

ever get in trouble because of that?

LJS9502_basic

Me? In trouble? What do you mean? I has control. Besides....I meant lust exists in response to my initial comment that I don't believe in love.:P

ever get in trouble because you lust, but dont believe in love?

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194197844077667059316682358889

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#49 194197844077667059316682358889
Member since 2003 • 49173 Posts
[QUOTE="KOTORkicker"][QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

HardQuor

I disagree mightily

I second xaos.

Try getting a good job at an interview without making eye contact.

Try getting a good job at an interview using only body language
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194197844077667059316682358889

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#50 194197844077667059316682358889
Member since 2003 • 49173 Posts
[QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="orazinac"][QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="EMOEVOLUTION"]

body language is a much stronger form of communication than language is.

orazinac

I disagree mightily

Think about this:

Would you be more emotionally scarred if I said I would whip out my penis opposed to if I actually whipped out my penis

Think about this: can you explain quantum mechanics via body language? Also, you chose the wrong gay guy to try and emotionally scar :(

How come I always get a gay guy when I whip my penis out?

Probably because of the bait you are using...