I need a solution to this problem I'm having with my girl friend right now, thanks in advance for any suggestions. So I just recently started a relationship, we been together for just 2-3 weeks. We hung out 3 times in which I payed everytime. I drive to her, pay for gas, pay for dinner, movies, and anything that we do. I end up spending close to $80 everytime we chill. She makes more money than me, she has 2 jobs where as me...I'm a student and only have a small part time job. She has never offered to pay for anything. When we goto the movies she just stands there when she orders the tickets, I don't want to be like "hey can you pay for youself?" so I just pay and don't say anything. The first time is fine but now it's like routine for her to do this. What should I tell her, and how should i tell her about this problem? I don't want to sound poor and be like "my money is tight want to go half half next time". It'll be weird.
LegitGamer3212
Dude...you're just living beyond your means. When she wants to go somewhere, tell her that you can't afford it and that you're broke as ****. Make a point of saying that before you ever even go out.
I mean...honesty, dude. You both want things out of the relationship, and it's sort of just decent courtesy to spell out clearly what you can and can't provide. If she wants someone to buy all of her **** for her, and if you can't (or WON'T) do that, then flatout start telling her before you ever even go out. Start telling her that you can't afford stuff, start suggesting that she pay her share, start suggesting cheaper ways to have a good time.
Either she'll find that reasonable and will accomodate your needs, or she won't. Just be honest. Tell her that you can't afford to live that way, suggest that she starts paying at least her share. That's a reasonable request FOR YOU, since you can't afford to keep carrying her around financially. If she finds that request UNREASONABLE, then you quite simply cannot provide what she wants out of a relationship. In which case...it's better to end the relationship sooner rather than later. The two of you are clearly not right for each other, you clearly can't meet each others' needs, so it's better to part ways early on amicable terms rather than prolonging a lie and then parting on far less desirable circumstances.
If she DEMANDS a dude with money, and if you either cannot or will not meet that demand, then things ARE going to end eventually. If your lack of ability to pay for all of her **** is a "Dealbreaker" for her, then then relationship WILL end if you are unable to provide for her needs. So...you'd might as well get that out into the open as soon as possible. If she stays with you and works with your being broke as ****, then good. If she dumps you because you're not giving her **** that you can't afford, then good. That ended an incompatible relationship while the ending was easy, you can then go out and find a woman whose needs ARE compatible with your own.
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