What do you consider Cheating?

I don't believe that your scenario is cheating, but since you didn't tell your gf where you were, I'd consider that it could lead to cheating.Yagr_Zero

Well, she is basically paying me to teach her how to drive. But then afterward (or before) we will have a smoke and drinks sometimes. But its just buisness, no pleasurelaidback_16

From that description it doesn't seem like cheating, but the fact that you feel the need to hide it is extremely sketchy in my opinion. Should your girlfriend find out, she would assume that you were doing much more than that because you hid everything, and would be completely justified in thinking that.

[QUOTE="laidback_16"]Well, she is basically paying me to teach her how to drive. But then afterward (or before) we will have a smoke and drinks sometimes. But its just buisness, no pleasureravensfan5252

From that description it doesn't seem like cheating, but the fact that you feel the need to hide it is extremely sketchy in my opinion. Should your girlfriend find out, she would assume that you were doing much more than that because you hid everything, and would be completely justified in thinking that.

Well the thing is, my girlfriend is...how you say, protective. And this girl who I am teaching how to drive is sooooooooooooo sex...good looking. And my girl would get jealous and start winning and complaining. I'm only in it for the money...and the smoking and drinking

[QUOTE="ravensfan5252"]

[QUOTE="laidback_16"]Well, she is basically paying me to teach her how to drive. But then afterward (or before) we will have a smoke and drinks sometimes. But its just buisness, no pleasurelaidback_16

From that description it doesn't seem like cheating, but the fact that you feel the need to hide it is extremely sketchy in my opinion. Should your girlfriend find out, she would assume that you were doing much more than that because you hid everything, and would be completely justified in thinking that.

Well the thing is, my girlfriend is...how you say, protective. And this girl who I am teaching how to drive is sooooooooooooo sex...good looking. And my girl would get jealous and start winning and complaining. I'm only in it for the money...and the smoking and drinking

yeah, but if she, no, when she finds out you are helping this girl, she will only be vindicated. Dont give her ammunition to defend her over protectiveness. Just be open and honest that way she cant say u were sneaking around. And to people who say "kissing isnt cheating" yo u guys must have very lax relationships because i know if i kissed another girl my g/f would publicly castrate me.

[QUOTE="ravensfan5252"]

[QUOTE="laidback_16"]Well, she is basically paying me to teach her how to drive. But then afterward (or before) we will have a smoke and drinks sometimes. But its just buisness, no pleasurelaidback_16

From that description it doesn't seem like cheating, but the fact that you feel the need to hide it is extremely sketchy in my opinion. Should your girlfriend find out, she would assume that you were doing much more than that because you hid everything, and would be completely justified in thinking that.

Well the thing is, my girlfriend is...how you say, protective. And this girl who I am teaching how to drive is sooooooooooooo sex...good looking. And my girl would get jealous and start winning and complaining. I'm only in it for the money...and the smoking and drinking

I dont blame her for being protective with the way you go about doing things. You've probably never given her a reason to trust you and now you further justify her actions by doing what your doing.

Pure genius.

[QUOTE="ravensfan5252"]

[QUOTE="laidback_16"]Well, she is basically paying me to teach her how to drive. But then afterward (or before) we will have a smoke and drinks sometimes. But its just buisness, no pleasurelaidback_16

From that description it doesn't seem like cheating, but the fact that you feel the need to hide it is extremely sketchy in my opinion. Should your girlfriend find out, she would assume that you were doing much more than that because you hid everything, and would be completely justified in thinking that.

Well the thing is, my girlfriend is...how you say, protective. And this girl who I am teaching how to drive is sooooooooooooo sex...good looking. And my girl would get jealous and start winning and complaining. I'm only in it for the money...and the smoking and drinking

Invite her along to smoke and drink with you guys then. If this is merely a friend thing, your girlfriend being there wouldn't make anything wrong provided that you guys don't make people feel uncomfortable when you're around them. If she declines, that's her own choice but you at least have the defense that she had the option to go and chose not to. I can't tell you how many fights I've gotten into with my girlfriend that could have easily been avoided if we were both straight up honest with each other from the start. Lying in a relationship is a huge mistake and will only lead to problems. Lying by omission (where you don't lie outright but you omit certain key details) is in my opinion just as bad as lying in situations like this.

No thats not cheating. Some women just like making a big deal out of nothing. xSIZEMATTER

But what he is doing is not nothing either.

Some men like to ASSume they are doing nothing when they are actually doing something.

[QUOTE="xSIZEMATTER"]No thats not cheating. Some women just like making a big deal out of nothing. Sajedene

But what he is doing is not nothing either.

Some men like to ASSume they are doing nothing when they are actually doing something.

From what I've read, it doesn't sound like hes doing anything wrong. lol why do women always stick together?

It's an uncomfterble situation to hear about, but if nothing's happening, then nothing's happening. I'm sure your girlfriend has guys she hangs out with and would do stuff for.

[QUOTE="Sajedene"]

[QUOTE="xSIZEMATTER"]No thats not cheating. Some women just like making a big deal out of nothing. xSIZEMATTER

But what he is doing is not nothing either.

Some men like to ASSume they are doing nothing when they are actually doing something.

From what I've read, it doesn't sound like hes doing anything wrong. lol why do women always stick together?

Its the fact that he is questioning what he is doing and the fact that he doesnt want to tell his gf because he assumes she will get pissed.

Yeah now she should get pissed since he is telling her after the fact - but if he knew nothing was going to happen or nothing will ever happen - then I dont see why he shouldnt tell the gf. If he did tell her and she got all pissed about it - then thats her problem and not his since he did his part and told her the truth - instead of concealing it with guilt as he is now.

It's an uncomfterble situation to hear about, but if nothing's happening, then nothing's happening. I'm sure your girlfriend has guys she hangs out with and would do stuff for.

kittykatz5k

lol, that sounds so wrong!

Its the fact that he is questioning what he is doing and the fact that he doesnt want to tell his gf because he assumes she will get pissed.

Yeah now she should get pissed since he is telling her after the fact - but if he knew nothing was going to happen or nothing will ever happen - then I dont see why he shouldnt tell the gf. If he did tell her and she got all pissed about it - then thats her problem and not his since he did his part and told her the truth - instead of concealing it with guilt as he is now.

Sajedene

I guess trust is just a thing of the past these days huh?

Why didn't you tell her when you started teaching and hanging out with this girl? That's what makes it seem rather shady. It's not cheating, but the fact that you're not telling her what's going on is going to become a bigger problem the longer this goes on.

[QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Its the fact that he is questioning what he is doing and the fact that he doesnt want to tell his gf because he assumes she will get pissed.

Yeah now she should get pissed since he is telling her after the fact - but if he knew nothing was going to happen or nothing will ever happen - then I dont see why he shouldnt tell the gf. If he did tell her and she got all pissed about it - then thats her problem and not his since he did his part and told her the truth - instead of concealing it with guilt as he is now.

xSIZEMATTER

I guess trust is just a thing of the past these days huh?

[QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Its the fact that he is questioning what he is doing and the fact that he doesnt want to tell his gf because he assumes she will get pissed.

Yeah now she should get pissed since he is telling her after the fact - but if he knew nothing was going to happen or nothing will ever happen - then I dont see why he shouldnt tell the gf. If he did tell her and she got all pissed about it - then thats her problem and not his since he did his part and told her the truth - instead of concealing it with guilt as he is now.

xSIZEMATTER

I guess trust is just a thing of the past these days huh?

Thats my point - if he knew he wasnt doing anything bad - he should have told the gf prior to or immediately after - not questioning whether that was cheating or not. Which shows his guilty conscience. If he trusted his gf enough to trust him, and if he wants to establish that trust in the relationship - he would have told her and not hide it from her.

But since he chooses to hide it, he doesnt trust himself or trust his gf to trust him. If he did tell her and she got pissed, then he had every right to get mad at her for not trusting him after he told her the truth.

I know he wasnt cheating. Thats been established. The issue here is why hide this then if you didnt do anything wrong.

[QUOTE="II_Seraphim_II"]Im really confused. Everyone is on this guys case for not telling his g/f about the situation (and i agree that he should have told her) yet no one seems even remotely bothered by the posters who believe making out with another girl is ok :|themufanman

wait...... HE KISSED HER!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh this guy is going to hell now i think hes cheating.hes a CHEATER CHEATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lol no i think he means other posters

[QUOTE="II_Seraphim_II"]Im really confused. Everyone is on this guys case for not telling his g/f about the situation (and i agree that he should have told her) yet no one seems even remotely bothered by the posters who believe making out with another girl is ok :|themufanman

wait...... HE KISSED HER!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh this guy is going to hell now i think hes cheating.hes a CHEATER CHEATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

no he didnt kiss her, but alot of people here are saying "its only cheating if you sleep with her." WTF? Lying to urself FTL? go find sum girl and start making out with her infront of your girlfriend and lets see how far you get before she firmly inserts her foot up your derrier.

Im really confused. Everyone is on this guys case for not telling his g/f about the situation (and i agree that he should have told her) yet no one seems even remotely bothered by the posters who believe making out with another girl is ok :|II_Seraphim_II

I know :| Of course kissing someone else is cheating, I'd never go out with someone who thinks it's fine...

Thats my point - if he knew he wasnt doing anything bad - he should have told the gf prior to or immediately after - not questioning whether that was cheating or not. Which shows his guilty conscience. If he trusted his gf enough to trust him, and if he wants to establish that trust in the relationship - he would have told her and not hide it from her.

But since he chooses to hide it, he doesnt trust himself or trust his gf to trust him. If he did tell her and she got pissed, then he had every right to get mad at her for not trusting him after he told her the truth.

I know he wasnt cheating. Thats been established. The issue here is why hide this then if you didnt do anything wrong.

Sajedene

I guess so, but What if, and I don't mean this in a insulting way, but what if his gf is just down right ugly and he knows if he tells her she's gonna get upset anyways because shes good looking?

Ok say if you have a girlfriend. But in the night time, you hook up with this other girl, and all you do is just smoke and drink with this girl, and teach her how to drive, but its not like ur touching her or anything. But you don't tell your girlfriend where u go. Do you consider that cheating?laidback_16

It's not cheating, but it's shady. You'd probably be pissed if your girl did this to you..

[QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Thats my point - if he knew he wasnt doing anything bad - he should have told the gf prior to or immediately after - not questioning whether that was cheating or not. Which shows his guilty conscience. If he trusted his gf enough to trust him, and if he wants to establish that trust in the relationship - he would have told her and not hide it from her.

But since he chooses to hide it, he doesnt trust himself or trust his gf to trust him. If he did tell her and she got pissed, then he had every right to get mad at her for not trusting him after he told her the truth.

I know he wasnt cheating. Thats been established. The issue here is why hide this then if you didnt do anything wrong.

xSIZEMATTER

I guess so, but What if, and I don't mean this in a insulting way, but what if his gf is just down right ugly and he knows if he tells her she's gonna get upset anyways because shes good looking?

Then thats not his problem but the girl and her insecurities. He did his part and if she still cant handle that then she needs the fixing - not him.

Then thats not his problem but the girl and her insecurities. He did his part and if she still cant handle that then she needs the fixing - not him.

Sajedene

Did I just win? yes I did. ;)

[QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Then thats not his problem but the girl and her insecurities. He did his part and if she still cant handle that then she needs the fixing - not him.

xSIZEMATTER

Did I just win? yes I did. ;)

How so? Her issues have nothing to do with the fact that he is concealing information from his gf (no matter how ugly she is) - he is at least telling her the truth then and establishing (or trying to) trust in the relationship. Her insecurities are a totally different matter.

[QUOTE="xSIZEMATTER"][QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Then thats not his problem but the girl and her insecurities. He did his part and if she still cant handle that then she needs the fixing - not him.

Sajedene

Did I just win? yes I did. ;)

How so? Her issues have nothing to do with the fact that he is concealing information from his gf (no matter how ugly she is) - he is at least telling her the truth then and establishing (or trying to) trust in the relationship. Her insecurities are a totally different matter.

I know. I was just taking up for the guy:P

I remember making a thread awhile go, and I got ran over by all the guys and girls like a dead dog in the middle of the road :lol:

[QUOTE="Sajedene"][QUOTE="xSIZEMATTER"][QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Then thats not his problem but the girl and her insecurities. He did his part and if she still cant handle that then she needs the fixing - not him.

xSIZEMATTER

Did I just win? yes I did. ;)

How so? Her issues have nothing to do with the fact that he is concealing information from his gf (no matter how ugly she is) - he is at least telling her the truth then and establishing (or trying to) trust in the relationship. Her insecurities are a totally different matter.

I know. I was just taking up for the guy:P

I remember making a thread awhile go, and I got ran over by all the guys and girls like a dead dog in the middle of the road :lol:

Mmmm roadkill. haha.

Im really confused. Everyone is on this guys case for not telling his g/f about the situation (and i agree that he should have told her) yet no one seems even remotely bothered by the posters who believe making out with another girl is ok :|II_Seraphim_II

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and mine is that it's competely okay to kiss someone else while you're in a relationship. Monogamy in itself doesn't seem like my cup o' tea at all, I think I'd prefer an open relationship.

[QUOTE="Sajedene"]

Then thats not his problem but the girl and her insecurities. He did his part and if she still cant handle that then she needs the fixing - not him.

xSIZEMATTER

Did I just win? yes I did. ;)

Scream it loud and proud, men triumph again.

I want to hear that primal rawr and pelvic thrust, assert your victory!