Why do so many guys seem to dislike the idea of girls approaching them?

[QUOTE="TecmoGirl"]Are ya'll just shocked and don't know how to capitalize?bobaban

Oh and do realize you're asking a place full of misogynistic nerds.

I'd be caught off guard because that almost never happens. I'd be flattered if a girl came up to me and asked me out, but if she made some kind of whistling sound or called be "sweetie" or "cutie" right off the bat, I would assume that she was drunk or trashy. Even if I was the most attractive man in the world, no girl should be throwing themselves at me so quickly. A polite conversation with mild flirting is much preferred.

so many guys?

I garauntee pretty much every girl on the planet has been hit on/approached more than your average guy, like alot more. Infact girls so rarely need to approach guys because they can just sit there and wait for it to happen.

I've even created a fake female internet dating profile just simply to see what happened and I was getting like 10+ emails a day, it was ridiculous. That never happens as a guy, short of you being like brad pitt good looking.

I have no problem with it

*Thinks back to first serious relationship, which was initiated by her*

Hmmm...

*Remembers that the relationship became a nightmare from which my scars have yet to heal*

Oh yeah, that's why.

Don't trust girls that take on the role of predator. At least in my experience, it was one of the worst thing that ever happened to me. I just wish that I hadn't lost my virginity to a sk##k, regardless of how hot she is.

A woman that initiates contact will not hesitate to callously discard you at her convenience.

If you do go for it, then I strongly recommend that you dump her, first. Be mean about it, too. Thinking back at my first relationship, I realize that I should have been mean to her, since in the end, she was just trying to get the cheap thrill of being a "conquistadora". Bah, since when did women engage in such crazyiness?

Don't trust girls that take on the role of predator. At least in my experience, it was one of the worst thing that ever happened to me. I just wish that I hadn't lost my virginity to a sk##k, regardless of how hot she is.

A woman that initiates contact will not hesitate to callously discard you at her convenience.dkrustyklown

Any real proof of this? You claim it's from experience, which even if is true (for all we know you could be making it up) wouldn't necessarily be a representative sample of reality. Do you have anything more scientific to back this up with,or are you just going by a guess?

That happened in grade school but in College it gets better:P

Any real proof of this? You claim it's from experience, which even if is true (for all we know you could be making it up) wouldn't necessarily be a representative sample of reality. Do you have anything more scientific to back this up with,or are you just going by a guess?

matthayter700

Why would I make up the story of one the lowest and most embarassing points in my life? No, it isn't a "representative sample". It's just the story of one experience that may or may not represent the rule. I have my experience and my lesson that I derived from that experience, and I relay it on this thread in order to warn of a possibility, that, at least in my case, became reality.

Was I a fool for being blinded by a smile? Yes. Am I ashamed of being a fool? Absolutely, yes. Will I fall for the same prize again? Hopefully not.

There is but one positive thing that came from that experience, and that is I now approach every interaction from a skeptical viewpoint and assume that everyone seeks to destroy me. I knew this girl for six years before she made a move. At the time, I found it inconcievable that a friend that I had known so long would act in such a callous and destructive way towards me just to plant a flag and move on. Trust is a mistake. Trust no one.

[QUOTE="matthayter700"]

Any real proof of this? You claim it's from experience, which even if is true (for all we know you could be making it up) wouldn't necessarily be a representative sample of reality. Do you have anything more scientific to back this up with,or are you just going by a guess?

dkrustyklown

Why would I make up the story of one the lowest and most embarassing points in my life? No, it isn't a "representative sample". It's just the story of one experience that may or may not represent the rule. I have my experience and my lesson that I derived from that experience, and I relay it on this thread in order to warn of a possibility, that, at least in my case, became reality.

Was I a fool for being blinded by a smile? Yes. Am I ashamed of being a fool? Absolutely, yes. Will I fall for the same prize again? Hopefully not.

There is but one positive thing that came from that experience, and that is I now approach every interaction from a skeptical viewpoint and assume that everyone seeks to destroy me. I knew this girl for six years before she made a move. At the time, I found it inconcievable that a friend that I had known so long would act in such a callous and destructive way towards me just to plant a flag and move on. Trust is a mistake. Trust no one.

So a hot chick initiated sex with you and then did something crazy? Sounds like the most standard situation ever. Also I can't imagine why a virgin would ever be mad about a "hot" chick essentially falling on their dick. I'd venture she's less crazy than you think too. WheresKinggiAt

It's probably because they're shocked or confused. Not necessarily a bad thing but since we are acustom to men being the approachers, when a women does it, it just seems weird.

[QUOTE="matthayter700"]

Any real proof of this? You claim it's from experience, which even if is true (for all we know you could be making it up) wouldn't necessarily be a representative sample of reality. Do you have anything more scientific to back this up with,or are you just going by a guess?

dkrustyklown

Why would I make up the story of one the lowest and most embarassing points in my life? No, it isn't a "representative sample". It's just the story of one experience that may or may not represent the rule. I have my experience and my lesson that I derived from that experience, and I relay it on this thread in order to warn of a possibility, that, at least in my case, became reality.

Was I a fool for being blinded by a smile? Yes. Am I ashamed of being a fool? Absolutely, yes. Will I fall for the same prize again? Hopefully not.

There is but one positive thing that came from that experience, and that is I now approach every interaction from a skeptical viewpoint and assume that everyone seeks to destroy me. I knew this girl for six years before she made a move. At the time, I found it inconcievable that a friend that I had known so long would act in such a callous and destructive way towards me just to plant a flag and move on. Trust is a mistake. Trust no one.

I got no problem with it. Hell, it's how I first met my fiancee.

I was minding my own business, and she mentioned that I was wearing a nice outfit at the time. Proving to her that I had mad game, I looked around and said "Who, me?"

Thus, the seeds of young love was planted. :oops:

I got no problem with it. Hell, it's how I first met my fiancee.

I was minding my own business, and she mentioned that I was wearing a nice outfit at the time. Proving to her that I had mad game, I looked around and said "Who, me?"

Thus, the seeds of young love was planted. :oops:

Hallenbeck77

I welcome them with open arms

[QUOTE="matthayter700"]Any real proof of this? You claim it's from experience, which even if is true (for all we know you could be making it up) wouldn't necessarily be a representative sample of reality. Do you have anything more scientific to back this up with,or are you just going by a guess?dkrustyklown

Was I a fool for being blinded by a smile? Yes. Am I ashamed of being a fool? Absolutely, yes. Will I fall for the same prize again? Hopefully not.

There is but one positive thing that came from that experience, and that is I now approach every interaction from a skeptical viewpoint and assume that everyone seeks to destroy me. I knew this girl for six years before she made a move. At the time, I found it inconcievable that a friend that I had known so long would act in such a callous and destructive way towards me just to plant a flag and move on. Trust is a mistake. Trust no one.

Anyway, I don't think "trust" is a mistake, so much as what you do with that trust that's a mistake. Yeah, a skeptical approach is good (perhaps asking questions that test someone's sincerety about something?) but something just sounds paranoid about a whole "trust no one" approach...

[QUOTE="matthayter700"]

Any real proof of this? You claim it's from experience, which even if is true (for all we know you could be making it up) wouldn't necessarily be a representative sample of reality. Do you have anything more scientific to back this up with,or are you just going by a guess?

dkrustyklown

Why would I make up the story of one the lowest and most embarassing points in my life? No, it isn't a "representative sample". It's just the story of one experience that may or may not represent the rule. I have my experience and my lesson that I derived from that experience, and I relay it on this thread in order to warn of a possibility, that, at least in my case, became reality.

Was I a fool for being blinded by a smile? Yes. Am I ashamed of being a fool? Absolutely, yes. Will I fall for the same prize again? Hopefully not.

There is but one positive thing that came from that experience, and that is I now approach every interaction from a skeptical viewpoint and assume that everyone seeks to destroy me. I knew this girl for six years before she made a move. At the time, I found it inconcievable that a friend that I had known so long would act in such a callous and destructive way towards me just to plant a flag and move on. Trust is a mistake. Trust no one.

Either way, trusting no one ever because some hot girl who you were friendzoned with decided to bang you and then break your heart is just ridiculous.WheresKinggiAt

Why? If someone that I had known and considered a friend for six years initiates a relationship, gets what she wants, then leaves in a whirlwind of destruction, and I am left wondering why she turned my life upside down, then that is a good reason to never trust anyone, even friends. She knew exactly what she was doing. The anger came afterwards, when more details of her motives emerged from mutual acquaintances. She did it to prove a point. On top of everything, the b##ch thought she was doing me a favor. I found it very hard to return to the place I was at before she screwed everything up. She caused a whole cluster of friends to shatter. Most sided with me, but there were some that I have not spoken with since then (ha, Tom had been trying to get in her pants ever since he met her, so of course he sided with her in another vain attempt to suck up. Too bad for him that it didn't work and he still didn't get any). To this day, I curse her every morning. May a thousand torments befall her and make her life miserable. When there was a serial killer on the loose that was targetting girls that looked like her, I freakin' crossed my fingers in hope that he would get her before getting caught. Alas, it did not happen.

[QUOTE="WheresKinggiAt"] Either way, trusting no one ever because some hot girl who you were friendzoned with decided to bang you and then break your heart is just ridiculous.dkrustyklown

Why? If someone that I had known and considered a friend for six years initiates a relationship, gets what she wants, then leaves in a whirlwind of destruction, and I am left wondering why she turned my life upside down, then that is a good reason to never trust anyone, even friends. She knew exactly what she was doing. The anger came afterwards, when more details of her motives emerged from mutual acquaintances. She did it to prove a point. On top of everything, the b##ch thought she was doing me a favor. I found it very hard to return to the place I was at before she screwed everything up. She caused a whole cluster of friends to shatter. Most sided with me, but there were some that I have not spoken with since then. To this day, I curse her every morning. May a thousand torments befall her and make her life miserable. When there was a serial killer on the loose that was targetting girls that looked like her, I freakin' crossed my fingers in hope that he would get her before getting caught. Alas, it did not happen.

The incident in question is only reason never to trust HER ever again, not all women in general.

I mean, I don't think she's a very good person, but you're definitely overreacting by wishing death upon her.

WheresKinggiAt

There is nothing wrong with wishing ill upon those that cause you harm.

STRONG>Girl: Hey how you doing, what's your name cutie?TecmoGirl

One time these group of girls I bumped into town kept saying I was sexy and stuff and one of them wanted my number and asked if I was single or not. I didn't answer back on being single or not but said maybe later for the phone number lol.

[QUOTE="WheresKinggiAt"]

I mean, I don't think she's a very good person, but you're definitely overreacting by wishing death upon her.

dkrustyklown

There is nothing wrong with wishing ill upon those that cause you harm.

Saves me from the awkward start to a hit on conversation + I know she is available = win.

I would prefer it, then again I am horrible at talking with random people.

I'm not saying you should send her a Christmas card but wishing her death is too harsh. I take it from your lack of contradicting me that my assumption was correct - she knew you were a virgin, gave you pity sex, and you wanted a relationship and got all clingy and it was a major turnoff. You probably could've kept banging her on a semi-regular basis and parlayed that into relationships with other girls perhaps even making her jealous. The way you played it was really bad and you should learn from your mistakes. Not saying the girl isn't a manipulative b**** but you didn't handle this situation optimally at all.

WheresKinggiAt

It took four months from when she first kissed me before it escalated to sex. The relationship lasted four more months after that. I'd hardly call that, "pity sex". Those were eight months that I really wish that I could have back. If I could only go back to that first kiss and slap the hell out of myself, then I would. Four months of MDMA-fueled sex was not worth the heartbreak. It just wasn't how I wanted my first relationship to turn out.

[QUOTE="WheresKinggiAt"]

I'm not saying you should send her a Christmas card but wishing her death is too harsh. I take it from your lack of contradicting me that my assumption was correct - she knew you were a virgin, gave you pity sex, and you wanted a relationship and got all clingy and it was a major turnoff. You probably could've kept banging her on a semi-regular basis and parlayed that into relationships with other girls perhaps even making her jealous. The way you played it was really bad and you should learn from your mistakes. Not saying the girl isn't a manipulative b**** but you didn't handle this situation optimally at all.

dkrustyklown

It took four months from when she first kissed me before it escalated to sex. The relationship lasted four more months after that. I'd hardly call that, "pity sex". Those were eight months that I really wish that I could have back. If I could only go back to that first kiss and slap the hell out of myself, then I would. Four months of MDMA-fueled sex was not worth the heartbreak.

Also my opinion on this has completely changed now. The girl ended the relationship and revealed her "motives" which were what? To trick you into falling for her or something? You should've just laughed in her face. You got to bang her on the reg for four months. She either was lying about her motives or is just some weird whore sociopath who isn't worth your time or anyone elses.

EDIT: Think about it this way. Your first relationship involved regularly having sex with a hot girl while rolling. You beat about 99.99% of other first relationships.

Ha ha, situations like that only happen in my wildest dreams.

:P

Come to Butthead.

Basically you are saying it is never worth getting involved with girls because of one bad experience.

WheresKinggiAt

No, I'm saying that it is better to get involved with girls on your own terms, instead of letting them lead. Had she not taken the initiative, then none of that unfortunate mess would have happened. We would still be friends, and our friends would still be friends with each other. I would be a happier person today had none of that happened. I don't make moves on my friends even if they are girls. Had she not made the first move, then none of that would have happened. She caught me completely off guard and I reacted poorly by going along with it. I was dazed for eight months. Yes, I followed her in with lots of hopes, but she also used my hopes to pull me in even further. It is a mistake that I will never make again.

Curse her, that is not how I wanted my first relationship to turn out.

[QUOTE="WheresKinggiAt"]

Basically you are saying it is never worth getting involved with girls because of one bad experience.

dkrustyklown

No, I'm saying that it is better to get involved with girls on your own terms, instead of letting them lead. Had she not taken the initiative, then none of that unfortunate mess would have happened. We would still be friends, and our friends would still be friends with each other. I would be a happier person today had none of that happened. I don't make moves on my friends even if they are girls. Had she not made the first move, then none of that would have happened. She caught me completely off guard and I reacted poorly by going along with it. I was dazed for eight months. Yes, I followed her in with lots of hopes, but she also used my hopes to pull me in even further. It is a mistake that I will never make again.

Curse her, that is not how I wanted my first relationship to turn out.

[QUOTE="TecmoGirl"]STRONG>Girl: Hey how you doing, what's your name cutie?harashawn

I wouldn't mind a girl approaching me as long as she is appropriate about it.