Check out who's in the Community Spotlight!  It's the miracle man of Guitar Hero II himself, Slizzunks!

Don't respond here, guys, it's his time to shine.

This is literally the exact same post I made on the GGD thread talking about this game.  I'm lazy.  Or, am I economical?  You decide.  Anyway, the best part of this whole entry is the gameplay footage, so click the link and watch it.  F'reals. Ninja Gaiden on DS is going to Pwn with a capital "P".

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"Check out what GameSpot had to say about the touch-based controls of Spiderman 3 on the DS:

"...It also makes you feel like you're in total control of Spider-Man. Apart from the fact that Spidey can now have more moves than the system has buttons to map them all to, it just feels more intuitive to unleash a flurry of attacks and webs by quickly making slashing and circular motions on the touch screen than it would by pressing buttons. That's especially true when reeling in enemies with webbing, which requires you to slide the stylus across the touch screen as if you were actually yanking a snared thug back toward you. The game isn't always perfect at translating your swipes into the intended actions, but the end result tends to be splattered thugs anyway."

I know S3 is different from what NGDS appears to be going for, but this is really encouraging.  The touch screen lets you do more moves than could be mapped to the buttons, and it feels... better?  Wow!  How can anyone not be excited about that?  Between this little tidbit and the NGDS gameplay video, I'm officially, shamelessly, incredibly stoked for this game.  Hype rules.

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EDIT: I decided to stop being so laz-o-nomical and post a proper article in the 100% Nintendo DS Union.  Come on, guys, humor me.

It's true.  It has to be.  Slunks interviewed me in his new blog feature about Guitar Hero heroes, so it gots to be true.

Don't it?

But then, when they're four days long, aren't they always good?  Let's see what I can remember, starting from Thursday...

I left work at a decent hour, came home, changed and cleaned up... then I think I just hung out.  I was probably with Nick.  No.  Matter of fact, I hung out with the kiddos.  The next day, the kids and I went to the park with my now civilian friend Mike for what will probably be the very last time.  It was already cool, but it was made cooler because I flirted with a gorgeous European blonde (...mmm... accents...) over half the time.  After about an hour and a half, I relinquished the kids to their mother for the weekend so I could get to partying proper.  Oh, for those of you who don't know, I'm divorced now.  I used to be sad about it, then mad, then... kinda smad or something... but now I'm okay.  Anyway, now you know.

Party time happened at a little dive called Kelley's -- the only hangout here in Clovis where adults can almost fool themselves into believing this place isn't all that bad.  It's not a really big place, but it's clean, and it's got music and drinking, so it's worthwhile every few weekends or so.  Then again, most of us who are in the military have had fun overseas, so Kelley's has a hard time comparing.  But, in the end, everything is what you make of it, and when you have enough people with good attitudes, any place can be fun.  Like when I country danced with my pal's fiancee (congrats and good luck to the two of them).  See what I mean?  It's all about attitude.

As fun as Friday was, there was no way it could have been as big as Saturday, the 5th of May, because Cinco de Mayo was the day of the big fight: "Golden Boy" Oscar De La Hoya vs. "Pretty Boy" Floyd Mayweather Jr.  Here's a little boxing history for those of you who don't know.  Before this fight, Mayweather Jr. had an immaculate record of 37-0 with 24 KO's.  He was the only person in the history of boxing to hold championship belts in five -- FIVE -- different weight classes.  Okay... that's more than impressive, that's unheard of, period.  It's absolutely monumental.  Not only has that never been achieved in the past, but it'll probably never be achieved again in the future.  So, having him matched up against another great champ was a gift.  Honestly, we're lucky to have even been alive to witness this event.  Fight fan or not, I hope you didn't miss it.

Anyway, Mayweather did exactly what every half-educated boxing fan knew he would do.  That is, he dodged, ducked, dipped, dived, and dodged his way around the ring, embarrassing DLH with every flurry of worthless punches the Mexican champion threw.  He laughed at De La Hoya at the end of every exchange, because although the crowd went ballistic with every one of DLH's swings, Mayweather knew what the slow-motion replays would reveal: Oscar hit a lot of elbows and forearms, and got socked across the cheeks more than people realized.  And he did it wearing red, white, and green shorts -- the colors of the Mexican flag.

It was exciting, and I won twenty bucks.  Cool.

I spent most of Sunday recovering from the Tequila the night before (quick note: Shen's not an alcoholic.  It was Cinco de Mayo.  I had to drink Tequila.  It's tradition :P), and agreed halfway through the day to take a trip out of town to a special steakhouse with Mike, Nick, Gary, and a few other buddies.  I love steaks, but the strangest thing happened while I was there.  See, I was youtubing about a week ago and I somehow got to watching some documentaries on slaughterhouses (strange because I actually started off by searching for "rap battles".  Anyone else get carried away on youtube like that?).  So as I'm sitting there at "The Big Texan", enjoying my delectable, perfectly cooked medium T-Bone steak, I started to remember the footage of the cows, and the blades, and the blood.  Ick.  I kicked it out of my head, sliced a thin bite away from the edge of the bone, and chewed stubbornly.  But I couldn't shake it.  It didn't make me sick, and I'm pretty sure I'm not going to become a vegetarian or anything, but I couldn't finish the steak.  Just couldn't.  It was a shame too, because it was my first $40 cut of beef.  So if you have the opportunity to watch some slaughterhouse footage, and you're really fond of your meat-eatin' ways, I'd definitely think twice.

After the meal, we went and saw Spiderman 3.  Have you seen it?  I thought it was so-so.

Finally, today happened, and it was just as chill as I could have asked for.  Other than having to go into town to re-register my car, I got to just sit around at Nick's and play Pokemon Pearl while he played Oblivion.  He hates it so much... he only played for like six hours.  It's funny listening to him complain about this thing and that in the game, but at the same time refuse to turn it off.  He loves it, he's just not fond of every part of it (any tips on lockpicking should be sent to him via GameSpot :P).

And that was it.  I had the kids which is always great, I did some extensive moderate drinking, got to watch "Cinco de" Mayweather make history on Oscar "#38" De La Hoya, visited a good friend for possibly the last time (a bittersweet reality of military living), and finished it all off with my feet up and my DS in hand.  The house is a wreck, and I still have to get my uniform ready for work tomorrow, meaning this is just one more weekend where I didn't accomplish much, but hey, I can't argue with the time I had.

***WARNING***
I'm about to completely spill the beans on how to get through the Lakebed Temple on Zelda: Twilight Princess.  Don't read this if you don't want to know how to get through it.

I caved in.  I was right on the brink of success, and I buckled.  All I needed to do was look from another angle, and I'd have been set.  But I crumbled.  I couldn't find my way through the Lakebed Temple in the beautiful, glorious Zelda: Twilight Princess... so I looked up the solution on GameFAQS.  Dishonah!

The worst part?  The answer was literally right in front of me, just like every single other Zelda head-scratcher.  I looked right into the eyes of the solution, but I didn't recognize it.  I even thought to myself, "okay, I need to get something onto this water spout so I can ride it."  When I looked up, what I needed to see was right before my eyes but, alas, I was standing directly under it.  It blended in.  I didn't pick it out.  So, instead of moving back and looking from farther away, I backtracked away from that room; I backtracked away from that whole area; I backtracked so far I forgot what the original problem was.  I did that until I finally hung my head in defeat -- just to find out... I was right there.

As soon as I read the solution, I wanted to kick myself.  But since I can only deliver a meaningful kick in the most tender of areas, went ahead and didn't.  Then I suddenly remembered when first entering the level.  Right there in the first big room of the dungeon, Midna basically gave me a tutorial on knocking stalactites off of the ceiling.  I instantly recognized it as something that would be pivotal to solving the dungeon, but that I was intended to eventually forget about as I progressed.  Right there, I had the edge, if I'd only just held on to that piece of information.  Maybe it's because I was so happy with myself for being ahead of the game (or so I let myself believe) that I let my guard down.  I don't know, but I'm mad that I didn't get through the temple unassisted.

And to think, just the other day I was talking to a friend at work about this game, telling him that I was hitched up at the Lakebed Temple.  I actually told him I was going to go back to the first room (the one with the "hey, you're gonna need this later, dude, so don't forget about it" tutorial) and look for anything I might have missed.  So I went back and I searched and searched.  I even walked on the stupid stalactites I'd knocked down so long ago over and over.  But I was so busy looking for a lever, or a switch, or a button to push, it didn't even dawn on me.  I think the stalactites in that room were laughing at me. I think the whole room was laughing at me.  It's like a cruel irony.  I couldn't see the forest for the trees, as they say.  What a shame.

Okay okay okay, the video quality is lousy in the dark spots, the sound is a little inconsistent, and I slip lots of bad words into what seems like clean, casual monologuing (that's what the disclaimer's for :)).  I hope you'll all understand that this isn't supposed to be a video "about" Guitar Hero II, it just has some GHII in it.  So if you don't like the camera angle when we're showing the gameplay, it's because we didn't... actually... care.  :)  I just wanted to put a glimpse of what we do here at my house up for your viewing pleasure.

Up first, I introduce myself, show off the art Nick drew on my Guitar Hero II X-Plorer, get bored of Nick's runthrough of "Message in a Bottle", give a tour of, you know... my kitchen, and explain why I have a fresh pineapple in there.  There's always a good reason.  Watch for Gary's inane antics in the background.

[video=dnM0lzTx5b4OuTLc]

Here on part 2, Nick has finished "Message", Gary pillages the hot dogs and butter in my fridge, I drink "tea" (burp...), and then play co-op Beast and the Harlot with Nick.  Poor Kris, he was recording it all.  He's not shown.  But he rules!

[video=JyE3xmCs5b4OuTLf]

Can't wait to hear everyone's comments.  If you want to see some more of what goes down at my house, let me know.  Hope you all enjoy.

Five stars.  All songs.  Expert.  Yay me.

I could have used the stickers to deck out my mini, plastic Gibson X-plorer, but why waste the space when my good friend Nick can draw this sweet image of ChunLi on it for me?  There's still some shading that can be done, plus some text to fill in the white area in the bottom-right, but it's looking slick already.  I just can't wait until he gets done with the front.

Once it's all finished, I'm going to spray it down with a layer of clear-coat to prevent it from smudging.  It means I won't be able to play GHII on the 360 for a little while, but I mean look at 'er.  Just beautiful.  It'll be so worth it once it's all finished.

I should go ahead and point out that this isn't image isn't originally Nick's.  I found it online, then he made with the art-magic and blessed the back of my Guitar Hero II controller with this famous Street Fighter vixen's sexy awesomeness.  Lucky guitar!  Props goes to the original artist, as well as to Nick for duplicating it.

Pictured here on the top is the image that appears on the top left corner of the guitar: the Street Fighter III: 3rd Strike logo.  In the center, the Kanji symbols for the phrase "strong woman" are pictured.  Finally, on the bottom, a close-up shot reveals the meticulous cross-stitching Nick used to bring the lettering out.  Oh yes.  I. Love. It.

Yesterday, while playing Guitar Hero II on my 360, I finally managed to beat the song Jordan, written by Buckethead specifically for this game.  The crazy thing is, I didn't really practice for it a lot beforehand -- I just tried at it two or three times, failed, then... I got it... (!)

It reminded me of when I finally, finally, beat Bark at the Moon on the first Guitar Hero for the Playstation.  As soon as I struck the last note, and I heard the crowd screaming, I went ballistic.  I unstrapped the white Gibson X-plorer guitar (one of those sorry models with the wonky whammy bar) from my back, hurled it into the sofa before I even realized what I was doing, and I pumped my fists like a madman, screaming and cheering myself on for finally struggling through Jordan.  Sure, I only hit about 80% of the song... and I only 3-starred it... but that doesn't mean beating Jordan was any less exciting.  Just ask the "lucky" recipients of my insane XBOX Live voice message which I began by screaming "I beat Jordan on Expert!" at the top of my lungs...  You catch that, Saga?

The feat netted me 30 gamerpoints, but having the I beat Buckethead's Jordan achievement means more in itself than any score.  The only thing that would be better is if I got a cool new Buckethead gamer pic or... wait!  Maybe... Better go check!

*zooom!!!*

I have a friend named Deshae who can kick my arse six ways from Sunday at just about every version of Street Fighter we play.  So, lucky for me, this video is not of me battling him.  Instead, this is one of me against one of his other friends, Delo, who I barely know.  I'm sure Deshae didn't really mind that I won, but I'm also fairly sure he was rooting for his other pal.  No big deal, though.  Just a friendly match... with a Pokemon standee as the prize for the winner.  What?

Anyway, I used to think I was the hotness at Street Fighter because, well, I didn't realize the rest of the world still played it.  Turns out, I'm just a decent player with a good attitude toward the game and lots of scrub tendencies.  Here's proof.  Enjoy.

 Warning: Video contains bad words, like ****, ****, ****, and ****.  Click at your own ******* discretion.