I suffer from Bipolar II Disorder (Bipolar with depression). Or at least I used to. I'm not too sure if it's something that completely goes away or if I was just able to keep it subdued for an extended period of time. In any case, I went through some mega depression a few years back and it was by far the worst feeling I've ever experienced in all my life. Days where I would wake up and nothing in the world could cheer me up in the slightest, not even my gf at the time. It was a drag on my school work and my relationships with my best friends and gf. I attempted suicide numerous times, and ended up in the hospital about 4 or 5 times because of it. All within a 6 month span no less.
I saw a psychiatrist and that did not help one bit. Nothing she told me would help me feel any better. After being examined my doctors I was diagnosed with severe depression and put on a high dose prescription for anti-depressants. The unfortunate thing was that the doctor diagnosed me incorrectly and rather then start me off easy on these new pills he gave me the full doseage and expected me to be okay, when in fact my depression got much, MUCH worse and I ended up crazy and suicidal again and swallowed an entire bottle of Ambien CR. I woke up in the hospital 2 days later :/
So after a while I finally met a doctor who actually knew what he was doing and took the time to really figure out what was wrong with me and got me on some meds that worked spectacularly. And the best part was I only needed to take them for about a year and go off it completely. Needless to say it worked wonders! I haven't had a suicidal breakdown or anything close to it in almost 3 years. In fact, even though life sometimes sucks now way worse than it did when I was deep in my depression, I can easily keep on smiling and feeling good. Looking back it just seems like I was bursting at the seams with teen angst and I sometimes wonder if there was anything ever seriously wrong with me or if I was just really immature. I'm not sure but I'm thankful to be over it and I'm very grateful to be sitting here today feeling so great.
I'm fairly against psychiatrists and that whole area of the medical field because I've encountered way too many doctors who just half ass their job and write up a prescription and send you on your way. Doctors like that can kill someone so easily, and I know first hand of those dangers. But there are a few doctors out there who really can help, and I'm grateful for those few decent doctors who actually worry about their patients more than the money.
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