Awakened by hunger, I slowly moved my head and eyes to see if there was any food left from last night. Boy I must have eaten the whole fridge. The couch screeched as I moved; it always screeched. It was a screechy couch it was. Had nothing to do with my proportions, of course. Finally setting my eyes on a bowl of spaghetti, I decided to eat it in the most unseemly manner ever witnessed by mankind. Reaching for my feet, I struggled to pull off my socks. They were dirty, they had to come off. After five minutes of wrestling and many a screech, the left one was off. That should be enough, I though. Eyeing the stale bowl of pasta on the small table in front of me, I reached for the ground and landed my foot on the carpet. More efforts...more screeching...
Finally, I managed to drag the carpet closer to me and with it the small table it was under. When the table was within reach of my foot, I dipped my big toe in the bowl and scooped out a hefty sample of spaghetti. The sauce was cold; it was dripping on the carpet, but I didn't care, I was hungry, I was always hungry. I don't know how I managed to get that pasta to my mouth using only my toe, and arms but it sure was a good workout. I plan on having pasta at least three times a week now. If that won't get me in shape, nothing will.
Log in to comment