terryprior

terryprior / Member

Forum Posts Following Followers
441 184 72

terryprior Blog

It wasn't me!

by on Comments

:D 'Why  does  a  surgeon  wear  a  mask  during  an  operation?'....'Because,  if   he  makes  a  mess  of  it,  he  will  be able  to pretend  it  wasn't  him.'

Thought for today!

by on Comments

:wink: :!: ' Tel me one of the symptoms of advancing age.'...'Getting a   "morning after"  without haveing had a "night before".' :)

Money!money!.......

by on Comments

:roll::?:(  Thought  for today his 'Money won't bring you happiness.'....'No, but it will enable you to be miserable in comfort.':wink:

Aircraft

by on Comments

:):o:x:shock:Nervous passenger to air hostess:How often do aircraft of this type crash?' Air hostess :'Only once.':lol:

Horror Union Members

by on Comments

To all Horror Union Members.  I  would  like  to  wish  you  all  a  (Horror-ific)   Horrific New Year and hope you all had a good Christmas.

PRISON vs WORK

by on Comments

             :evil:     In Prison vs Work    8)                   

:evil: In  Prison-  you spend the majority of your time in an 8 x 10 cell.  

8) At Work- you spend most of your time in a 6 x 8 cubicle.

:evil: In Prison- you get three meals a day (free).

8) At Work- you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it yourself.

:evil: In Prison- you get time off for good behavior.

8) At Work- you get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK.

:evil: In Prison- a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you.

8) At Work- you must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself.

:evil: In Prison- you can watch TV and play games.

8) At Work- you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

:evil: In Prison- you get your own toilet.

8) At Work- you have to share.

:evil: In Prison- they allow your family and your friends to visit you.

8) At Work- you can not even speak to your family and your friends

:evil: In Prison- all expenses are paid for by taxpayers with  no work at all.

8) At Work- you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.

:evil: In Prison- you spend most of your life looking through the bars from the inside wanting to get out.

8) At Work- you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside the bars.

:!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::!::

Just the way I like it.

by on Comments

:D:D:D:D:lol::lol::lol:8)8):o:oops:

 A Man walks into a pub,goes up to the bar and asks for a beer

The barman says:   "Certaninly, sir That'll be one penny."  "One penny?" exclaimed the customer.The barman nods so the man examines the  menu. :o  "Could I have the mixed grill with chips,peas,and a fried egg?"  :) "Certaninly. sir." replies  the  barman, "but now we're talking real money. It's four pence." :shock:The customer car't believe his ears "Four pence? Where's the guy who owns this place?" The barman replies: "Upstairs with my wife.":wink: "What's he doing with your wife?":oops: "Same as I'm doing to  his business.":oops::lol::lol::lol:
  • 36 results
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4