The forecaster for F1.com is presented with the award for most accurate weather predictor of 2009, somehow managing to correctly forecast the flood that hit Bahrain.
Bernie hires Zsolt Baumgartner as a one-off for the Hungarian GP when he notices Fernando's tendency to pick up penalties there...yuxwallin
Realising his driver line-up isn't as strong as it could be, Bernie imposes a 100MPH limit on every other car in the sport. To his dismay, despite this obvious advantage his drivers now have, they still wind up last of the finishers constantly. Getting rather frustrated, Ecclestone then gains Vettel and Webber for the team to gain some real starpower. Unfortunately, here comes the Japanese GP...
...however, come the Chinese GP Hamilton returns to the grid after James Allen leads his ITV crew to overturn Ecclestone's decision. Bernie explains he overturned the decision as quick as possible so Allen didn't tell th story of every single movement Lewis has made in his entire life...
...but after China qualifying James Allen is one of the few defenders of Hamilton after he reputedly kicked down a door in the McLaren motorhome after qualifying 10th, while Alonso takes pole. Hamilton claimed to have been blocked from leaving the pit lane on his final run, but Bernie ignores his protests after Hamilton's ban was overturned. Meanwhile, Allen leads a six-man protest against Alonso, campaigning for him to be banned for Brazil.
Bernie Ecclestone reveals 2010 calendar, consisting of just the French GP & Hungarian GP 9 times each. Explaining the situation, he stated that "the two most exciting races had to be put on a single calendar by themselves".
Not surprisingly, the winner of the World Championship is Adrian Sutil, who runs round each circuit for 2 hours at each weekend when absolutely no one else bothers showing up for the entire year.
Ecclestone disapproves of the F1PU after news of his Super Team has been avoided for over a month. In the meantime, A rebellious yob has written "clean me" in the dust that has settled on Bernie's cars.
Reports suggest Mr. Mosley told his wife he was attending a "Fancy Dress Party" 60,000 times so far in his marriage. Well, that's a pound for every time so far then.
A Survey carried out on Thursday revealed that 92% of F1 fans, jornalists and such of the like now see DC as an "invisible figure" in the sport. How true this turned out to be just one day later when, at the end of Practice 1, he hit the wall in Valencia. However, both sessions were reported to have "no one hitting the walls".
With Spain winning in Wimbledon, Euro 2008 and the Tour de France, latest reports suggest Spanish people have forgotten who Fernando Alonso is. Many ask if he's a cricket player.
Reports suggest that Ferrari are hot favourites going into the Belgian GP, as Spa's notorious pit-lane entry may prove rather difficult for Lewis Hamilton...
Remarkable scenes of yet more controversy as the top 5 in the Italian GP were all penalised after the race. Vettel was penalised for having a Ferrari engine in a non-Ferrari car, Kovalainen penalised for being a McLaren beating two Ferrari's, Kubica for having a monotonous voice, Alonso for his indecisiveness on his facial hair style and Heidfeld for not smiling enough. This hands Felipe Massa race victory, however all penalties strangely enough fit everyone inbetween Massa and Hamilton, thus giving Massa a 5 point lead over Hamilton. Cries of foul play are heard by all penalised drivers, but the FIA re-write the rules 6 days after so that all penalties are mentioned within the rulebook.
Following Helio Castroneves' lead, Massa and Hamilton to take a hiatus from F1 for a year to focus on their moves in preparation for Dancing with the Stars: Racing Edition.
Haha yes, that wins this thread. I honestly dont like the whole night race thing, maybe for one race a season ok but to do it to whim to the TV in the West is not on, its supposed to be a world fan sport, and how can it be if they do it in 2 AM in a country as I wouldnt watch it if I had work the next day (as it will be Monday there remember so they will be missing work etc).
Kimi is on top of the driver's standings after amendments to his results thanks to the FIA.
In a bizarre twist of events the FIA have retroactively awarded points to drivers who have had races ruined by misfortune and poor driving. Kimi Raikkonen gains 10 points for his "win" at Canada, 6 Were a awarded to Hamilton who narrowly avoided a collision in the pits (Yes, he watched the traffic lights, it's hard to imagine I know, but bear with me here) Kimi gains another 5 points when his engine unexploded in Valencia. Another 10 points for Kimi in Belgium when he didn't crash and Hamilton didn't pass him naughtily so he gains 2 points. Then another 8 points for Kimi where he crashed out of Singapore and was hit by both McLarens in Fuji.
James Allen retains job for switchover to BBC in 2009. Incredibly, the Australian GP gains absolutely no viewers as all UK fans watch SPEED instead. How SPEED even managed to air in the UK remains a mystery.
Log in to comment