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Halo 3 finished. Super quick impressions before bed.
by Flawie on Comments
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Halo 3 arrived in the mail today but I only had time for an hour or so before work. So now I´m home again and I brought with me 2 red bull and a Steak & Cheese Subway sandwich with everything on it. Now im gonna enjoy Halo 3 all night. I intend to play until at least 6 AM. The Halo marathon begins NOW. 12.30 AM Local time ! *Pops open first Red Bull & takes the first bite on the big sandwich! Lets go Master Chief, lets see if you live up to the ridiculous hype !
This guy is pretty much as famous as the pope by now but if you, by any chance, have somehow managed to miss thisdude and his hilarious reviews of the games we loved to hate back in the 80s you owe it to yourself to check him out. This guy is growing rapidly in popularity and is soon coming out with his own DVD. You can already buy the T-Shirt. If you, like me, spent your youth in front of a NES trying to complete games that couldnt be completed because they were so poorly deisgned you will laugh your behind off. That is, if you can handle the over the top immature language and the beer drinking! Watching this guy´s library of reviews is a notaglic overdose with a huge amount of humor! I almost feel compelled to click his PayPal button just to help this guy spew over some more childhood memories!First off, here his page: http://www.cinemassacre.com/Movies/Nes_Nerd.html
2nd off, heres some reviews of his I can really recommend. Enjoy!
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - of all the games he has reviewd this must be the one I can identify myself with the most. I can really feel his frustration in every frustrating moment of this game. Oh god, that frikkin hole that you´re just supposed to walk over. GOD!
Bible Games - You take Wolfenstein 3D and you switch the texures for something that is supposed to be "Noah´s Ark" themed. Just watch it. like 7 or 8 games that are complete ripoffs of other ****c games with some kind of Bible theme over it. Except the one where you blow of snowmens heads, put out exploding pancakes, go to "Onion land" & flee from those nasty flesheating potatochips!!!
Also check out his Ghostbuster review and his Top Gun review for 2 more mindblowingly bad games. Then you go on to watch the rest!
Im really glad that a guy like this gets the attention he deserves.
Virtua Fighter 5 (PS3)
+ Really solid fighting mechanics
+ Cool, interesting and well balanced characters
+ Beautiful graphics and animations
+ Addictive Singeplayer Arcadestyle campaign
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- low quality soundeffects
- boring soundtrack
- No online multiplayer(yet)
- kinda weak AI
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Score: 8.0
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Heavenly Sword (PS3)
+ Unchallenged visual quality on characters and landscapes
+ Insane facialanimations and super fluid combatanimations
+ Cool characters with loads of personality
+ Interesting stancebased combat & fun bossfights
+ Great sound & music. 10.0 scoring voiceacting !
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- Some games dosent suffer from being short. HS do. It is WAY to short.
- Combat and AI can feel very repetative & stiff
- Sixaxis moments feel kinda patched on and feels kinda boring after a while
- Some tearing, framerate-drops & some parts of the graphics are kinda ugly once you see past the characters
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Score: 8.0
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Super Paper Mario (Wii)
+ Great visualdesign!!
+ Awesome story with heavy focus on how love can save the universe. Spread the love!
+ Excellent humor. Great comments and references makes it really fun to read all the dialogue!
+ Extremely good usage of the Mariouniverse. Feels very nostalgic but feels very fresh at the same time.
+ Many nice gamemechanics (mindblowing 3D flipping), items and abilities.
+ Lenghty campaign with loads of extra stuff so look for and collect. Easily 20 effectivehours without trying.
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-Camera can get very confusing if you need to aim properlywhen flipped to 3D
- On occasion you run into somannoying backtracking or stretching of levels.
- Bosses are a bit to easy (but still VERY impressive to look at)
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Score: 9.0
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The game has no boobphysics! All that graphical bliss and female characters chests are still made of wood. In a gamingworld where the female ideals are way over the top you finally get one strong, brave and independent heroine and it turns out she is made of plastic. Its not about seeing virtual jiggle, its about upholding the realistic illusion!! Even the extremely fat son of King Bohan, Roach, has boobphysics, or rather, fatphysics. Overall a great, satisfying actiongame with insane presentation & Superb charactersbut that is way to short, very shallow and has some segments that feels kinda patched on there. I give it 8.0 / 10
Bring it on! Im gearing up with noodles, coke zero, some Captain Morgan Spiced gold, some fast food and a whole lot time off work. Let the news start rolling in. Looking forward to the live shows. They will be awesome as usual.Hoping to see alotfrom DMC4, MGS4, FFXIII, Killzone 2, Lost Odyssey, RE5, Mario Galaxy and loads more. It will be a blast !
Colin McRae died this weekend in a helicoptercrash together with his 5 year old son. Extremey tragic :( My thoughts are with him in the better place he is in now and with his family and friends! He was the worlds best racing driver and the games with his name on it will always be the best pure racinggames ever. I still remember the day when I was very young and the first Colin McRae came out. I took my bike to visit the dad of a friend of my little brother to get to play it and I still remember watching the extremely cool intro of that game over and over.
Also thoughts go out to his Swedish mapreader Tina Thörner
R.I.P Colin McRae, 1968 - 2007. May your racing spirit live on forever !
Totally over the top flipped out Punkrock - Hardcore -Funk - Rock N Roll hybrid band from Japan, MAXIMUM THE HORMONE. I just randomly found some of their vids on YouTube and now I cant listen to anything else. They are just so kick ass over the top I headbang and laugh everytime I listen to them. Its unlike anything else I´ve ever heard or seen. They care nothing about how they look, the just rock your socks off so hard. Everyone into J-Rock, punk, hardcore, metal or anything in between owe them to themselves to check these guys (and kickass girl on the drums) out! Heres som YouTube to get you started! And really, you should be WATCHING this band when you listen to them for the first time because their videosare the coolest ever, as over the top crazy and funny as the band itself.Allow yourself to be sucked in by the raw awesomeness that is MAXIMUM THE HORMONE!!!
Maximum The Hormone - Koi no Mega Lover
Maximum The Hormone - Zetsobou Billy
Maximum The Hormone - Whats Up, The People !?
Maximum The Hormone - Koi no Suuitto Kuso Meriken
Maximum The Hormone - Rolling 1000 tOON !
I am currently looking into getting these videos so that I can personally upload some of them to my profile because some of these videos are masterpieces of energy!
Its that time again. Update from Cliffy B´s blog. This time he gives us loads of reasons why Bioshock is GOTY 2007. I agree completely with what he says. I´ve read alot of Bioshock reviews and gutreactions, this is by far the best. Poo on a stick, Teenage girl gamers on Oral B diet, how awesome a spidergun would be, McGuyver, lactose intolerant rosies & Camp Shenanegins! Yep, its Cliff Bleszinski´s final words on Bioshock, the game that will probably turn out to be my game of the year as well unless Mass Effect is exacly as good as it seems to be. The following is a direct quote from http://www.cliffyb.com/ as usual, and as usual alot of his text will be censored sincehis coollanguage isnt allowed on the site. Take it away Cliff:
*UPDATE* Appearantly Gamespots posting system has locked up on "One or more words withing your message was automatically censored" even tho I have gone for over 1 hour manually removing every word that might be even alightly offensive. So I can no longer post the whole blog. Only a prt from it. You can read the rest on his personal site *UPDATE*
"2007-09-08 | final thoughts on bioshock
Bioshock is hands down my game of the year. That's right, I said it. I was looking forward to coming home from work and firing this bad boy up throughout the entire experience. Last time that happened was RE4 and God of War(s.) I'm not just saying this because it uses our technology or because I'm friends with some of the team members, no, it is in fact a phenomenal blend of well paced horror, narrative, action and meta RPG moments.
The best part about the game is the fact that the majority of the narrative is what I like to call, simply "passive narrative." There's a recording on a desk, there's a painting or a picture on the wall - you want to ignore them as a gamer, fine, you won't get any story. But you know what? Few people would ignore them and if a person is that determined to undermine the coolness of their interactive experience they're going to find a way. Hell you can walk out of a movie or eject a DVD if you don't want to find out what happens in a film.
Anyways, on to my highlights and strange observations about the whole experience. These are somewhat spoiler filled so turn back now if you haven't played most of the title.
Let's first talk about Mr. Nip Tuck aka "Plastic Surgeon Dude."
I've always said that there's a huge value to be had in an non player character yelling at the player. Ever since the first Medal of Honor when my CO was yelling "GO GO GO GET UP THE BEACH NOOOOW" I've had a deep appreciation for getting virtually screamed at.
So when I was finally able to fight the plastic surgeon character (which in the grand scheme of boss battles really just seemed like a regular splicer with 5x the hitpoints) I found myself cringing as he was running around the room all willy nilly and screaming at me that I'm fat and that I'm ugly and that I really shouldn't have pounded down that case of Tasty Kakes. This will be the only boss character in videogame history that will drive teenaged girl gamers to go on the Oral B diet and start with botulism shots to the forehead early.
I was secretly hoping that he'd be followed up with the "You're not popular and your mom dresses you funny" boss and then "you've got a tinypenis I'm going to go back to my jackrabbit" ex wife characters.
Moving on, and more importantly, does anyone really want to fire bees at anyone in a videogame?
I don't understand how this brainstorming session went down. Like, I get freezing people and shattering them with your wrench... that's cool... I get setting people ablaze, because, you know, it's pretty funny. (Well, except when it's a monk setting himself on fire on purpose in order to protest a war or something like that.)
In the words of my hair twin Dane Cook**** bees. I'll punch bees in the face. Who gets killed by bees?"
Are your foes even allergic to the bees? What about gluten? Could I throw some wheat at them and watch them swell up like Will Smith in "Hitch?"
More importantly, who WANTS to shoot bees? So bullets aren't fun enough, we want to shoot... bees? They're not even killer wasps or spiders. A spider gun would be good because, hey, who wants spiders crawling all over them. (No, you weird people at the exotic animal show do not count and no Morgan Webb neither do you - what's wrong with you people can't you see that spiders are******* evil?) Anyways, the spiders could bite your foe and start cocooning them up in a silky web while they scream "OH GOD GET THEM OFF OF ME TWO LEGS GOOD EIGHT LEGS BAD!"
Oooh that's good, hang on, I have to open GAMEIDEAS.TXT."
The Ps3 has arrived. They sent me the non-bundled version of it tho even tho I order the 2 games / 2 controllers version. Laaaame. I just wrote a long angry E-mail to them saying I want the rest of my order. But the console itself is here!
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