I am totally poor. :(

I'm completly out of money. Gone. Zip. I have under fifty dollars in the bank, and a credit card that I've been using way too much to pay for everything, and I really need to lay off and not use it for a while.

I got pet insurence to pay for, car insurence, pet food, other neccsary pet supplies and products.

So...Yeah, new games don't really fit into that equation right now. :P I did manage to buy a Metallica CD earlier this week, but that was on the card, and because I was tired of putting off buying it. I really should have got it not too long after it came out, I'm slow. :(

*Sighs* I hate my low-paying job with few hours, and a-hole managers. I can't wait to get out of there...

You ever just have one of those days? And I don't mean that as "everything went wrong", I mean, you wake up, and you just know it's going to suck.

I woke up today only to hear that they didn't want me to work today. First, I was pissed because I got only two days to work, which was bad enough as it was. Then they don't even want me in those days? WTF? Also, I went and bought a dress and devil horns and the like for a costume, something that I couldn't really afford to buy, but did, because I love Halloween and want to live it up, and be a little slut...

But, nope, about forty bucks down he can. Of course, the boss gave me a line of **** over the phone that they had to cut me for financial reasons. My dad got really pissed. He's used to being bullied around by his own job, so he took real offense to that.

He started in on me as to why I didn't get more irate with my boss, but what can you say to your own boss whom explained to you a million times the situation? I mean, I can only go so damn far with the guy? So you know what he did? He called him up himself! Who does that, seriously? I just went upstairs, I couldn't handle hearing that... Really.

My dad does not like to see me depressed or sad. It really pisses him off. There were times when he actually started a fight with me about me being depressed, that I shouldn't be, ect. I mean, the guy can be scary, he's done some bad **** to people in the past, I'm actually surprised he hasn't killed anybody yet, to be honest.

I used to get so depressed that I would start "doing things" to myself. Pseudo-hanging, self mutilation, ect. Sometimes I took off down the road in the middle of the night and walk for miles and miles just to get away from those people. That made things even worse for him. (Granted, he shouldn't have been such a dick in the first place, but I digress.) And I think that's why he got so angry with the guy, he doesn't want to see me depressed again.

Well, ever since he chewed him out, I know things are going to be awkward at work now. That is, when I get back there, I've been off all week (Which explains why I'm always here, goddamn it.) and I don't go back until Thursday.

Of course, my sister brought her kids over, which helped a whole bunch. I can't stand kids, sorry, I can't. The screaming and yelling made me want to turn homicidal and start stabbing random people in the eyes with a pen. I can't leave the computer and get some actual work done around here for worry of her getting ahold of it and screwing with it.

Everybody was yelling back and forth, arguing, they want me to go get food when I'm not ready to eat yet. They want me to watch the kids when that's not even my job. If that makes me a a-hole, then so be it. I didn't ask for those kids to be dropped off here, how is that my responsibility? If it were up to me, I'd send them right back out the door.

I'm an animal person, not a kid person, keep them away from me at all times. A responsible person knows if they are good with kids or not, and knows if they can watch them, I can't. I may very well eat them and steal their immortal souls...Hey, I warned you. ;)

*Sighs* Oh well, things have settled down a bit. Tomorrow I'm going on another bike ride, then carving pumpkins, then hitting some haunted houses. What I call a relaxing evening. :)

Chow. :P

La la la la...What to say...What's new...

Um, I'm going to Pittsburgh again tomorrow, to go to Kennywood, a big amusement park. They're having a big Halloween shindig. I've been to the park before, but never during this. It should be fun, whee! Hazzy like roller coasters! (Jumps up and down.)

...I want a Haunting Ground poster so bad. :(

(No, I don't know why I said that, it just popped up...)

Alright, talk to you guys later.

Aw, jeese, I hate you, GameSpot, I hate you... :(

Get the forums back, please, I beg of you. I haven't met a gaming community like this one before. I need it, I crave it, give, give, give! You lazy bastards!

But, I digress, let me bring you up as to the events that occurred the week it's been down, and I was unable to post.

Fall's here! I love fall, it's my favorite season. Beautiful colors, temperate weather, a gloomy, dark sort of atmosphere, especially in the woods. This is when I take the most walks in the woods, which are a mere short drive away. I grew up in the sticks, and I can't find myself gone too long from them lest I go mad.

So I went out on a big walk with my dog, Spooky, on one of the nearby trails. It went through the trees, then through a nice, dandelion-ridden bog, an overlook, then circled back to the start. It was...Amazing. Truly, picturesque, and I will be sure to bring a camera next time. It was just her and I, all alone out there, and it felt marvelous.

Times and events like these are when you truly bond with your dog. I really feel sorry for the people out there that live in the big cities and can't experience this with their dog(s). I could never live in a city. I'd go crazy. We have a strong bond, and is well trained by yours truly, so she was able to go off leash and run beside and in front of me.

I put her orange life-jacket vest and a large bell on her to protect her from the hunters in the woods. Archery season has begun around here. In gun season, though, I'll have to just walk on Sundays, when hunting isn't allowed. I have no problem with hunters, though, I'm one myself. I just haven't been able to lately due to money and time restrictions.

Times like this bring out the true bond between beast and man. Where you can look into an animals eyes and derive a certain spiritual link that only you can discern. They understand more than you could ever imagine, it's almost as though you are one. I was amazed how smart she was, how much in tune with the situation. She blazed the trail before me, knowing exactly where to go. If she went too far, behind or in front, or wandered off, my "come" whistle (a long whistle followed by two short ones.) brung her back at a blistering speed.

There was one particular incident, that she did, that really amazed me. We stumbled into the bog part of the trail, which was a bit muddy. She ran out into the flowers, and stood, and it was one of the most beautiful scenes I swear to you I've ever seen. My stunning tan-black-and white mutt standing in a large field of white dandelions with the sun illuminating the whole valley. Damn, I needed a camera, I won't make that mistake of not bringing one again.

Anyway, she stepped into a big mud pit, which made me yell. "Spooky, you damn pain in the ass! Look what you did!" I wasn't happy, my car would be muddied from here back.

You wanna know what that dog did? She looked up at me, with that knowing, intelligent expression, then took off across the dandilion field like her head was on fire and her ass was catch'in. She tore through it from left to right, like a race car, going in a loop. Then, she stepped out in front of me, looking right at me.

Her paws, which are white, were clean, without a speck of mud.

I clapped, laughed, then said. "Spooky, I applaud you, ****ing awesome, Spook, ****ing awesome...."

Okay, now, that's Hewie-level s*** there, people. That's smart, that's scary, and she rules. It just goes to show you, the smartest, best dogs are mutts, not those cookie-cuter purebreds. Who needs a pedigree when you have something healthy and unique? There's no other dog like mine in the world, and for that I am truly grateful.

I would kill for my dog, I would murder for my dog. I would do anything for her, and I would rip apart the person that would so much as touch her. The same thing goes for my cats and small animals, I may add.  In the same sense, I also expect her to protect me, which is why I only adopt dogs of the protective sort. Having a non-protective dog is like having a husband that doesn't defend your honor, and you call that a useless waste-of-space. That, she is not, not like some Yorkie or something. :P

When we reached the lookout point, which was a large stand with stairs made out of wood, it was one of those moments of reflection. You could see the whole bog, the whole valley of dandelions, the whole forest. She looked out over it with me, and it felt fantastic. And of course, her trying to walk up and down those big wooden steps was hilarious.

I plan to do it again, but go down another path, too. I'm going to buy her a dog saddle bag so that we can carry some food and other essentials, and go all day. Hopefully, sometime next week, if things go smoothly.

But, in other news, I finally saw the dentist last Tuesday. He took an X-ray, and tried to maneuver my jaw back into place. It was excruciating, as his thumb was hitting my wisdom teeth and pressing it, hard, so that it was bleeding and swelling, and it hurt like hell, I practically cried in anguish. Still, to no avail, he recommended an orthodontist, pretty much said I was f***ed, and charged me eighty dollars that I really couldn't afford, and that was that.

So, I went to that orthodontist, and he examined it, and pretty much just gave me some muscle relaxers, said it should loosen the muscles that are keeping by jaw locked like it was, said to eat soft foods, and that I should get this splint for 600$. I pretty much shook my head at that last one, told them I could barely affort the damn checkup and pills, and just see if this works.

So, yeah, I can still only open my mouth two finger wide. I was told to only eat soft foods, and I did the first day. But, it didn't last long. Sorry, Hazzy need her food. I can't live on yogurt and soups. Especially a carnally driven person like myself, that needs meat, meat, and more meat. Nothing satisfies me like pure animal flesh. :D

Well, the coming weeks should yield whether this thing gets better or not. I know I don't have 600$, I'd rather get surgery and be disfigured for the rest of my life then pay for some stupid splint that probably won't work anyway. Hey, scars are cool and sexy. They'd match the ones on my legs. ;)

I went to Pittsburgh yesterday, which is a good hundred miles from here, but I wanted to do something to get my mind off this bull****, so I went to the annual Pet Expo. I stopped at Monroeville along the way and did some shopping at the local pet stores and Petsmart, because we don't have any around here and there are some things you can only buy there, and it's worth the monthly trip. The Expo was fun, with a petting zoo (Llamas are fun! Whee!) and free stuff, what's not to love? I saw about a billion dogs, mostly boxers and pit bulls (awesome!), and I was amazed at how well behaved they all were. No fights, no disorder.

My old man had to come with me, because I don't know my way around the 'Burgh all that well. He was surprisingly well behaved, too, which is odd for him. He usually has to start some sort of trouble with me in one way or anther. Sometimes, just sometimes, my family cooperates, and we don't want to kill one another....Sometimes. ;)

All right, see you guys later, I plan to go on a big bike ride tomorrow with my pooch. Gotta make the most of the fall season, while it's here.

Well, this truly and utterly sucks.

Imagine, if you will, people, waking up one morning and not being able to open your mouth more than two inches. You can't get it back in place, no matter what you do, and you need to be careful what you eat.

Sucks? You better believe it does.

This is a problem I had for almost a year now. It came about suddenly, out of the f'ing blue. I was sleeping when I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't really open my mouth properly. It scared the living hell out of me. It fixed itself when I laid on the opposite side for the night, and it popped back into place. Since then, it would come out only when I was eating chips or beef jerky. Sometimes something like steak would also do it. But it always went back in.

Not this time, though. It went out two days ago and hasn't gone back into place. I can only open it about two inches, which means I have to be careful what I eat, and it hurts when it does. I ate a steak sandwich the other night, and I had to be careful, and it took a long, long time. I honestly am lost for what to do.

I think I need to go to a doctor. The problem is I have no health insurance, I do for my dog, but not myself.

I've read that surgery might be needed, I'm ever so excited about that. I don't have the money, and I'd be paying for it forever. I would have to take time off of work, which would really suck considering I don't get enough days to work as it is.

Just one of the many unusual, out-of-the-blue health problems and emergencies I've had in my life.

But, in good news, I got the Demento Soundtrack in the mail today! The art on the cover and the doodle of Daniella is masterfully done. It's so beautifully presented. The inside is filled with information, none of which I can read. I don't suppose anyone here can translate it, can they?

I love Riccardo's theme, of course, and I enjoyed having a slightly extended Lunatic Piano sequence, and having the music during the Acetic/Sulfuric acid trap B scene, and the Neverland Precious Hewie remix.

Oh well, wish me luck with my jaw, I'm going to need it. :P

Hello there, fellow GameSpoters and...Hey wait, you're reading my journal! What the hell! This supposed to be private! You sicko! You perv! You....!

(Suddenly gets turned on)

...Can stay for a while. (Pushes chair towards you with foot.) ;)

Ah, this is the first entry of my first journal...Ever, I've never been a fan of expressing my opinions in public. This is different, though, you don't know me. Mwahahaha.

Eventually, I do plan to post some pictures of my pets and maybe even myself...The ones that don't kill you almost instantly, that is. My animals are my children, and I love to flash those around. When I do fanfiction, or what-have-you, I will post it here for you to see and know. And worship goddamn you!

Speaking of which, yes I know my banner is crap. I did the best I could with what I had. I do not posses this marvelous tool you people have that is called "photoshop." You magnificent bastards. I wanted to do something with a raptor in it, but couldn't find the right pictures right now. So I went with Riccardo, because he is smexy, and he is awesome. And you will bow to him when in my journal! Bow!

Um, so current events....

Almost done typing up the first draft of my Riccardo/Fiona fan fiction. Look for it on Fanfiction.net in about a few weeks. I apologize for it taking so long. I'm a busy girl. Though, I suppose this week will give me a good amount of time off to work on it. Petco gave me only two days to work this week! You guys suck! Now Hazzy will have less money, and that is not a good thing. No, Hazzy need money. Money good. Money makes the voices go away...

My sister just bought a new house, I went to it today to "survey the area" holy hell is it crap. Walls ripped up, carpet ripped out, and the whole place smells funny. She always was the 'handy woman', so she won't have a problem.

Erm. I'm also cleaning out my mouse cage. Mice are cool. :)

I went shooting yesterday, totally peppered up our targets. Oh lord there's nothing else more fun then taking a shotgun to something, pumping out those shells, and doing it again! God, I wish I could do that one-handed pump that they do in the movies. The rifle was fun, too. I'm extra-good with that! My shotgun skills need homing, though. With time, with time.

I'm still playing Haunting Ground, and I'm going to be for a while. Sonic Gems Collection was alright, but I really only bought it so that I could have Sonic CD. So, really, it's gonna spend most of it's time sitting in it's case in the entetainment center. I also got a bigger TV for my gaming station.

I'm sure you're bored by now. Okay. Done. Talk to you later. :)