First a quick plug, I posted an Uncharted : Drakes Fortune review today. Thumbs it up if you like it, and discuss below if you have any tips or comments.

While nothing has been signed yet, it is a pretty good bet that I and my parents (partners) have sold our business. This is going to be a change for me on a number of levels, so it is both exciting and scary. The business is a deli/video, and as such the vast majority of my food and entertainment needs have been met by the business, as well as petrol, seeing as the business owns the cars.

So for the last few years I've simply been taking games home from the shop (we've owned it for about 6 years, but I only got back into console gaming when I bought a 360 a couple of years ago) as well as movies, placing a priority on my value for time. But soon I'm going to have start paying for the privilege. At the start of this year a rental share company supplied us with games (a more profitable way for us to rent games), so I took home a bunch that we sold off as a result, with the intent of keeping them in reserve until this inevitable day. So I do have a few great games (Mass Effect, Super Paper Mario, Forza 2, Viva Pinata) plus some that might not have had been huge hits but I'm sure I will still enjoy (Eternal Sonata, Overlord, MOH : Airborne, plus some GameCube games I bought for the Wii but never played).

So with that in mind, I'm probably going to try and cram in as many of the shorter linear games as I can that happen to be on the rental shelf, though there are a few I'm not sure about. I want to play Bioshock, but perhaps I should wait for the PS3 version. I think I will like Burnout Paradise, but that seems like a longer term game; I should probably take it home at least once before we sell to see if I do enjoy it though. I'm wondering whether to give Metal Gear Solid 4 a run through, or whether that might be worth purchasing. For those that have played it, does it have much replay value? There is Oblivion and Two Worlds, but they are longer term games I should probably buy if I want to play them. I've been eyeing Metroid Prime 3, but I keep leaving it because I think I should finish 1 & 2 first. There are a few games that do seem pretty simple 'play them once' games though. I brought home No More Heroes tonight, and I expect Ninja Gaiden 2 and Medal of Honor Heroes 2 to follow.

Of course there are also some games I've wanted to play that the shop never had, so when it comes time to lay down my own money, they will be top of the list. Zack & Wiki, Marvel : Ultimate Alliance and Ratchet & Clank : Tools of Destruction spring to mind. I also recently grabbed a 3000 point card for XBLA, and given the quality of releases lately I think I might order another one before we get out. For the price of one full game I should be able to get some really good value out of the likes of Braid, Geometry Wars 2, Castle Crashers, Bionic Commando : Rearmed, Assault Heroes 2, N+ and Exit. Given I can take free Wii games from the shop, I haven't even checked out Wiiware, so I might grab some points for that too and keep them up my sleeve in case something catches my eye (all tax deductible of course).

While we are selling this business for a profit, we have also been carrying debt from a previous business that went downhill, so overall we are going to end up probably just over break even. We've been doing 60+ hour weeks for a decade (over the 2 business), and I'm over it. I bought a house a couple of years ago, and given there isn't going to be huge wads of cash left over when we sell, I'm going to need to get a job relatively quickly so I can pay it off, not to mention that I'm going to have get used to paying for food and petrol (as the business provided most of this). Having worked for myself for a decade, that might be weird. I consider myself to be a great worker with a good work ethic so hopefully it won't be too hard to get my foot in a door. I've just got no idea what door I want to stick my foot in. I could probably become a sales rep pretty easy by talking to some of the companies that supply us at the moment, but I'm also thinking something easy like working for a bank. Dad keeps telling me to go work in a mine where they earn big bucks from day one, but I just don't think I'd like the work, even if the pay is great.Suppose I'd better start looking at the careers section of the paper and see if something takes my fancy. I work very well with my parents and we will consider another business, but we are done with something that requires extra hours to make it profitable. If we can get something that is more like 40 hours each a week and still pulling in a decent wage, then we will consider it.

Then I've got to consider whether I will have someone living with me. My sister lives with me and was paying me rent (less than what I could ask of course, though she is prone to whinge about it) and I've been missing that extra money while she has been away in America for 3 months. She comes back soon, but she also got engaged before she left. They seem to want to move out with each other pretty quickly, and I want to try and convince them both to live with me. I understand they want more privacy, but I think they would be doing themselves a financial disservice if they rented in the general market while trying to save for a house; I reckon they could save a couple hundred dollars a week if they stayed with me. I've got plenty of good stuff, and if she moves out, I don't think I could just have a random person come and live with me.

Ah, interesting times.

I enjoy having friends over to play some Rainbow Six Vegas 2 in Terrorist Hunt. I headed over to this sites game page, and noticed there were some cheats. Gabu did a great blog about cheats, and this is kind of an extension of the ideas he presented. Because most of RSV2's cheats aren't 'cheats'. There is no invincibility, or unlimited ammo, grenades or the like. You get a Big Head mode (though I couldn't seem to get this to work). You get Super Rag Doll Physics, guys do backflips when you shoot them in the head, and in GI Joe mode tracers become lasers.

Much as I like cheats in games, I think I like Easter Eggs more. Not stuff that just modifies some numbers I can't see; lives, ammo, clipping etc. Stuff that developers took a little effort to put in the game to make it more fun. I remember finding the corpses of Indiana Jones and Luke Skywalker while playing Duke Nukem 3D, and it brought a smile to my dial. I remember playing a cracked version of a Star Wars game on the Amiga 500 way back when, which had modified audio, full of swearing and hilarious takes on lines from the Star Wars universe.

I guess Easter Eggs can fit into two categories; homage and wacky. The homage is putting something non-essential into a game that fits, but is reference to something outside the game, or a previous entry in the series. I can't think of anything particular, but perhaps I just don't pay enough attention. These are what I would call 'a nice touch', but I can't say I'm significantly impressed by them.

The wacky stuff is what I love. Stuff that doesn't fit into the game world, or really changes things that don't fit into the usual tone of the game. Some games take themselves pretty seriously these days in regards to both their gameplay and story (and I don't have a problem with this) which makes wacky inclusions all the more contrasting and hilarious. A case in point would be the Super Rag Doll physics in RSV2. It's funny when the semi-realistic military shooter you were playing sends guys halfway across a room to bounce off a wall from a shotgun blast. Here are a few types of Easter Eggs I'd like to see more often.

Stupidfunny dialogue. This would be great to unlock after your first play through a campaign. These days obviously plenty of work goes into voice acting, and ensuring character development, story and overall tone remain cohesive throughout is a big task. Stupidfunny dialogue would take up much smaller time, and doesn't need to make sense; it's funny because it doesn't. It doesn't need to be something that the voice actors need to do. It could be the developers phoning it in over a night or two. Change the story to something completely ridiculous. Maybe the justification for shooting up a bunch of guys is because their friend killed your pet ladybug or something. You've likely seen clips on youtube where people take footage from games and movies and dub silly stuff over the top. That's what I'm thinking about here. How funny would it be to play Call of Duty 4 with all of the in-game voices speaking like polite English gentry? "Well I say, you shot me in my leg, old chap!"

Silly graphics. This has been done before, but more would be good. What if you could unlock a Flintstones car in your favourite racing game (even if it is just a skin rather than a full model)? Or Kitt? The Aliens modification for Doom was a great example of a full conversion. Recently Ghost Squad had a couple of modes you could unlock after completing the game; everyone either turned into ninjas, or everyone wore bikinis and fired with squirt guns shaped like dolphins. Imagine mowing down clowns in WW2 instead of Nazi's. Or mimes. Everyone hates mimes more than Nazi's. The downside is that graphics are likely to take a lot longer to include than some hackneyed dialogue.

Silly game modes or modifications. The Super Rag Doll physics in RSV2 is an example of this. Funny changes to the physics system or any of the gameplay elements that makes them fun or funny. Games that let you change gravity can be a lot of fun, adding this to some 'serious' games could make them extremely funny. Playing car games where your car bounces off obstacles like a pinball would be a blast. I remember a mod for Unreal Tournament that put "Pow!" "Whack!" etc balloons over peoples heads when they got hit by bullets.

AI doing completely random things. This is just me, but under the right conditions I'd like to see AI do something very silly. By 'right conditions' I mean something akin to a cheat code; you have to behave a certain way in the game that would be outside how the game is normally played to trigger it. Then the enemy break out in dance, sing a song, shoot each other simultaneously at point blank range, or your team mates tell you they want to snuggle. Those are pretty simple, I'm sure someone can come up with stuff that is much crazier and more entertaining.

These days we don't play games just for fun, sometimes games offer us legitimate scares, tension and drama. But even in those games, I wish the chance to change things up and turn a serious game into a hilarious one was explored more often. Are there any memorable Easter Eggs you've seen? Other funny stuff you would like see included in games?

When it comes to this years games, I haven't been overhyping myself. I tend to read the majority of Gamespots previews and news, but I don't bother too much to look at images, trailers or gameplay footage until it is close to the release date, if I bother at all. Dead Space is one of those games that sounds like it will be pretty good based on those previews.

Maybe I missed the memo, but I was surprised by something that arrived in a dealer kit today (I've repeated this info multiple times but in the interest of making sure everyone understands what I'm talking about, I own a video store); there is a prequel animated full length movie titled Dead Space : Downfall. Maybe this was mentioned somewhere in the news and I missed it.

The synopsis in the kit;

Dead Space is a feature length sci-fi/horror animated movie based on the much anticipated Electronic Arts video set for release Halloween 2008. Dead Space will serve as a prequel to the game and will take adult animated horror to a whole new level. The movie gives the needed back-story to fully appreciate the game and includes storyline embedded game secrets.

Well... some of that sounds like toss, but I guess they are supposed to hype themselves. Take adult animated horror to a whole new level? I'm going to guess the Japanese are already doing it. Needed back-story? You mean EA aren't going to give me enough back story to enjoy the game if I don't watch this DVD first? Embedded game secrets? What the hell does that mean?

Here's the greatest part. The kit has a listing for extras that is formatted thusly;
2 exclusive "cheat codes" (essential to the game)

Elsewhere in the kit it says the included cheats codes are 'integral' to the game. Someone please fire the marketing department. Marketing stupidity aside, I'm looking forward to giving it a watch. The great part is, it looks like one of the screener discs the company sent has this on it. I won't be able to watch it over the next couple of nights, but I'll let you know what I think once I've seen it. Release date is October 31st worldwide to coincide with the game.

EDIT : Turns out only the trailer was on the disc. Looks OK, but not spectacular. 'Crucial backstory', eh? After watching it, I can't help but feel that watching this DVD first will take away some of the mystery from the game.

Hi folks,

I recently finished Devil May Cry 4 and I've written a review. I've read over it a number of times and can't see anything specifically worng with it, but I'm not quite happy with it. I'm still on the fence as to whether I score it 7.5 or 8. I think my problem is that the text review doesn't match the score, and I harp on about the difficulty a little too much, though by the same token this is likely to be the make or break on whether someone loves the games or loathes it. I thought before I submitted it as a player review I would get some feedback from my peers, as I know some of you are great writers. Feedback much appreciated.

The review

Devil May Cry 4 is a slickly animated action game, pitting you against a horde of demons as you make your way through the highly detailed and visually stunning environments. There is huge depth to the combat systems in place, but the same depth and steep learning curve may be daunting for some.

As I have not played previous versions of this game, initially the story was a bit lost on me. The story is a mixed bag; in some of the cutscenes, Nero is mourning for Kyrie, his female interest who becomes involved in the story, and the voice acting here as he wails for her is superb. At other times, particularly with Dante but also with Nero, they display wanton bravado and their behaviour is playful and whimsical. On their own these cutscenes work well, but their tones do seem at odds with each other at times. Regardless of their tone, any time there is action in these cutscenes, you are ensured an entertaining show to rival any action sequence that Hollywood can produce. Without giving any twists away, the story serves well enough to keep you moving along and provides the back drop to slay plenty of demons.

You begin the game as Nero, and an intro fight with Dante (who you will play as later in the game) teaches you the basics of combat to get you started. At the outset Nero has his sword, his firearm and Devil Bringer, his supernaturally powered arm, as weapons. A handful of combos for his sword are available, with plenty more moves to unlock for his weapons.

There are two types of currency in the game, the first of which are blood orbs. These are collected from slain enemies, and from items you can break in the environments. These can be used to buy items, such as healing items or holy water (to deal damage to enemies), or permanent increases to your magic and health. The other currency is proud orbs, which are awarded at the end of each mission. The amount earned depends on your grade for that mission, which comprises of how long it took and your style among other things. Which brings us to the style meter.

Once a combat sequence begins and you land an attack, a style meter will appear in the corner of the screen, which begins at Deadly (a D rank) and works it way up to a potential SSS rank, but begins to drop as time goes on, and drops faster the higher the current rank. The key to raising your style meter is to use different attacks. The sooner you reuse the same attack, the less it will impact on your style meter, or not at all while it continues to decrease. On the one hand this forces variety to get better style and encourages unlocking more moves, but some enemies may only be prone to certain attacks or will viciously counterattack if you use certain moves. Overall though, the system works well, and can give you incentive to replay a mission to get a better rank.

Nero has plenty of moves, both offensive and evasive that he can learn by using the proud points he earns at the end of each mission. Some of these are almost essential to learn, and certain areas may be excruciatingly difficult or frustrating without them. You can go back and play previous missions again if you want to earn more proud points if you do find yourself short of an essential skill. Most of the variety in your attacks will come from Red Queen, your sword. Most of the combos require some variation of locking on to an enemy, directional pushes with the analog stick, and sometimes precise timing of the melee button during certain animations, including a number of mid-air combos that can help juggle your foes. While the large selection and sometimes complex moves may take some time to get used to, once you do the controls feel responsive and you will rarely pull off a move you weren't trying to. Snatch is a great ability that let's you use your Devil Bringer to drag enemies towards you, or in the case of heavier enemies pull you towards them, even while you are in mid-air. This really makes the combat intense and helps fuel your style meter as you are nearly always in combat instead of having to close the distance between enemies.

Devil Bringer is also used similarly to drag you around pseudo-platforming elements, among other environmental puzzles that are scattered through the first half of the game. These are not bad on their own, but are usually a little too long, too frequent or require you to do the whole section again if you fail. In the latter half of the game when you control Dante, these sections become nearly nonexistent; better pacing in this regard would have been appreciated. There is also a fair amount of back tracking in the game, to the point of confusion. At times I was unsure whether I was heading in the right direction, and at one point did a full circle of an area before finding the right exit, because it had been several hours since I was last there.

After a period of time playing as Nero, I began to settle into certain attack routines. Make no mistake, the combat was definitely fun, but I reached a limit for how many moves I wanted to memorise. While I had points I could spend, my brain was already overloaded and forgetting to employ some of the moves that I had learned. Then the game switched to Dante, which was an alienating experience. Dante is even more complex to play than Nero. Dante has four styles, which can be switched on the fly by using the directional pad, which changes the functionality of the B button and enables combos for that particular style. On top of that, Dante acquires new weapons and firearms, which can also be switched on the fly. Mastery of Dante and switching between his styles and weapons is sure to earn you high style points, but it will take plenty of practice to get there.

The enemies you fight and the combat are really the highlight of the game. Whenever you encounter a new enemy, it is preceded by well produced cut scenes that gives you an impression of their menace. All of the in-game animation and visual effects are superb, making the action slick, fast, and intense, with no slowdown anywhere in the game. The game keeps things fresh by changing the mix and numbers of enemies in any given area, which often means employing different tactics each time to avoid getting the snot beaten out of you. The bosses are impressive sights to behold... it's a shame however that a few of them will be faced 3 times in the game with no significant changes.

What may mitigate your enjoyment factor of the game is how fast your reflexes are, your dexterity to string together combos, and how difficult you like your games. Combat with regular enemies can be challenging but not terribly frustrating once you have learned their behaviours, though some combinations of enemies will certainly provide a higher challenge. The bosses on the other hand, can be downright frustrating until you learn their behaviours and how to best take advantage of them. For many of the boss fights, I turned to FAQ's and video walk throughs as I felt somewhat helpless after a few attempts. Even once you have learned their basic patterns, it will still take some diligence, fast reflexes and practice to take them down. Most stages do have a couple of automatic checkpoints throughout, and there is always one before a boss fight. Restarting a saved game however will begin at the beginning of a mission.

There is an automatic mode where the game initiates combos from button mashing. While I did not like the lack of control this gave (such as performing automatic combos when I was actively trying to initiate another), it will allow players not so interested in learning the nuances of combat a chance at a decent style score. When it comes to items, the game also employs an increasing price each time you buy an item. This is fine for certain items, such as permanent increases in health, of which you can only buy a limited number. For reusable items, like recovering lost health, this is ludicrous. For example, cheap healing stars start off at 500 red orbs, and scale by 500 (based on my experience) each time you buy another. This means if you buy 5, if it will cost you 7500; another 5 will cost you an additional 20000. Perhaps there is a cap, but this system is a slap in the face to less skilled gamers. I lost a boss fight after using a few items, and turned off my console rather than continue so that I could preserve those lower prices on my last save. This is obviously not a desirable outcome.

Despite all that bashing, for the most part the game skirts the line between frustrating and the satisfaction you get when you make it a little further through the level or boss fight than the last time. My playthrough was on Devil Hunter Mode, though an easier mode does exist. Completion of the game unlocks some Bonus Art, Devil May Cry History (which would have been more useful before starting the game) and Bloody Palace, which is a timed arena mode, with more time awarded for better style as you face progressively harder enemies. The Son of Sparda difficulty mode is also unlocked, and there are an additional 3 to unlock on top of that for the perversely masochistic or savant among you.

Devil May Cry 4 has plenty of things going for it with great control, excellent presentation throughout all aspects of the game, and a deep combat system to sink your teeth into. If you are interested in this genre then the only reason not to play this game is if a strong challenge frustrates you.

Just posted a review for Assault Heroes, which was a blast for as long as it lasted.

I was wondering what you guys think of downloadable games, as I don't recall too many (if any) of you mentioning such games throughout my time here. I think some of them are great, even if they don't always last too long. That said I still wouldn't say I play too many, mainly because I can take full games home for free from my shop. Once I'm out, I will certainly be giving them more attention.

A couple of other random things. I'm playing Devil May Cry 4, and this thing is freaking hard. I have to turn to a FAQ every two seconds, and after getting my ass handed to me each time I face a boss, I have to check to figure out how on earth I am supposed to avoid it's attacks and actually get a hit in. After another whipping, I check the video footage so I can actually see how it is done. While it's challenging even once you know what you are doing, it is definitely not intuitive to actually figure out the process on your own. Am I just terrible at games, or is that one bloody insane? Even though I haven't played one before I went with Devil Hunter mode, which might have been a mistake.

There is something I want to do, and I'm considering making it a regular blog entry, but only if people are interested in reading it. I have an idea for a card-based video game, where you summon creatures to fight against others. Basically something you would see in Developer 4 a Day, but breaking it down like a diary format so it is digestible over a period of time. That way I can get feedback from you guys as well as I go along. I don't have any delusion about it becoming an actual game, but I will enjoy designing it anyway. This is completely self-indulgent and I will do it regardless whether it is on Gamespot or not, but I'm willing to share it if people are interested.

And a shout out to Jim, I just went back and looked at a few of your older reviews. I had to laugh at your Devil May Cry review, I think you've come a long way from insulting Gamespot and fanboys! Your recent reviews are some of the best user reviews I've seen. Orgasmic indeed.

After writing my Resident Evil 4 review, I think I've caught the bug. After some people on my friends list suggested it, I tried out Condemned and reviewed a few days back. I think it's probably a little rushed, but still decent. I also reviewed Buzz Tv Quiz. Opposite sides of the gaming spectrum!

Like my RE4 review, I think they might be a little long-winded, but get the main points across. If you are interested, let me know what you think.

There is one thing sorely lacking in todays video game market, and that is good old-fashioned beat-em-ups. I'm talking about 2D sprites, attacking left and right, moving up and down on a 2D field that has 'depth', and laying the smackdown with good ol' fisticuffs. Of course, part of why they have been in decline for some time is because they are old-fashioned. While I haven't researched and traced it, I expect the decline of beat-em-ups is partly due to the introduction of the action hack and slash games we have today, which have benefited from 3D worlds and models, and analog movement for multidirectional attacks. Now I'm no expert on beat-em-ups, and I've seen many more in the arcades than I actually played, but I'd still like to play some in my own home (probably because back when they were popular, I had no lunch money to play them).

We have 3 perfect mediums for console beat-em-ups; XBLA, PSN and WiiWare/Virtual Console (I assume Steam or other downloadable services are viable for PC, but I have not used these services). Here is what those services currently offer us today in terms of beat-em-ups:

Golden Axe (VC, XBLA)
Golden Axe 2 (VC)
Golden Axe 3 (VC)
Streets of Rage (VC)
Streets of Rage 2 (VC, XBLA)
Streets of Rage 3 (VC)
Double Dragon (VC, XBLA)
Final Fight (VC)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (XBLA)

Maybe there are a few more, but Gamespots search features for those particular services is not optimal. So we've got 8 VC titles (Altered Beast was listed as a beat-em-up, but doesn't qualify), and 4 XBLA titles, of which 2 are shared. Yep, no PSN beat-em-ups for you! Also of note is that there are no original titles in that bunch. The only one I've downloaded is Streets of Rage 2, which is likely to be considered one of the shining gems of the genre by many. The rest I've played before and don't have enough interest to play again, or in the case of Golden Axe 2 + 3, don't sound worth the effort. (I'd probably download Final Fight if XBLA got an arcade port as opposed to the SNES version on the VC though). However, there is Castle Crashers coming later in the year, which certainly has my interest.

I thought it might be interesting to break down some of the things beat-em-ups did, whether it is still relevant, and what could be improved.

Basic Combos - A staple of beat-em-ups. After a few hits connect, the next one or few are different animations, usually knocking the opponent to the ground.
Complex Combos - Anything that requires more than a single button mash. Double Dragon's elbow or Axle's Grand Upper move from SOR2 are examples of these. Not real complex, to be sure, but requires at least a little finesse, timing and enemy placement to get right.
Special Attacks - The Streets of Rage series had a button for a special attack. The only one I recall specifically is SOR2, which had two options. These attacks usually got you out of trouble when your arse was being handed to you, but using the special cost you a small portion of your life, so you could not rely on it. I think the Alien vs Predator arcade game followed the same system. I may be wrong, but I think SOR 1 used a 'backup' system, where you could call for backup a limited number of times per level. Whereby it would scroll back to the start of the level and a cop car would fire a rocket or somesuch in your general direction, taking out most of the bad guys. Awesome. Golden Axe had a magic system, where characters had different special attacks based on how many magic potions they had stored up.
Different Characters - Most games had multiple characters you could choose to play as, who had differing stats and attacks. This added a bit of replay value, and allowed you to select someone suited to your play $tyle
Co-op attacks - Nearly all beat-em-ups have multiplayer. Some had co-op attacks, where two characters could combine, or do a special attack together that was better than their individual moves. Simpsons Arcade comes to mind.
Kick-em when they're down - Often you would knock someone down, only to have other enemies to attend to. Some games however, let you continue the beatdown while they were helpless on the ground.
Weapons - Many beat-em-ups had weapons of some sort. Usually these are taken from enemies, and then used against them. Sometimes they would disappear after a certain number of uses, or when you were knocked down. We are talking mostly knives, baseball bats and lead pipes of the thug variety, though some have used the occasional firearms.
Grappling - I think Double Dragon is the first game I remember to use this, but it seemed expanded on and perfected by the likes of Final Fight and Streets of Rage. In case anyone has no idea what I am talking about, by running into enemies you could 'hold them', and instead of punching them in the face like normal, your attacks would knee them in the stomach, or suplex them. Enemies could also grapple you, though you could usually get out of it with the right button presses. If memory serves, you could even take advantage of being grappled by behind in Final Fight; while someone had their arms snaked around your arms and neck, you could jump up and plant both feet on someones face in front of you.
Bosses - The vast majority of beat-em-ups had bosses. Sometimes earlier bosses, possibly in weaker forms and/or combined with other enemies, would come back in later levels. Trying to figure out how to avoid their brutal attacks and land some punches of your own was usually most of the fun. The best ones were tense affairs, where you knew if you mistimed your attacks, you were going to get a pounding.
Multiple Paths - The only game I can recall off the top of my head that did this was Streets of Rage 3, which sometimes gave you a choice of which way you wanted to go, and had to replay the game if you wanted to try the other way.
Vehicles - I use the term vehicle loosely. Anything you can ride. The beasts you can ride in Golden Axe come to mind, and you could ride horses in Knights of the Round.
Multidirection Attacks - There is only one game I can recall, and it is a marginal inclusion (due to firearms); Robocop 2 arcade. Where most beat-em-ups have an attack button that works whichever way you are facing, Robocop 2 had buttons to fire both left and right, which meant you could move to the left while firing to the right. This doesn't work with most beat-em-ups, as attacking usually stops you from moving, but I thought it was interesting enough to point out.
Environmental Hazards - In some games, you and enemies could be thrown off edges, or into fires and other hazards.

So what could be done to beat-em-ups to make them more relevant?

Regenerating Health - Almost every other genre has it. It probably makes less sense here, and would require beat-em-ups that were otherwise difficult to have it balance. A system like Ninja Gainden II where you only regenerate a portion of your health between battles would probably be the best fit. This is certainly not necessary for the genre, but something I haven't seen done outside of your health being restored at the end of each stage.
Graphics - While some of the XBLA remakes have been retouched, we could have some great 2D sprites to look at on todays consoles. We could potentially do away with life bars, and have all of the damage we and our enemies have received on display right in front of us. Better graphics will also allow us to have super smooth, detailed, and varied animations. Or they could follow Street Fighter IV's lead, and have everything rendered in 3D, but played in the traditional beat-em-up way.
Energy Bar - I'm not talking about your life bar. Attacks could take up energy, and your more powerful attacks would use up more. Once it is out, you have to wait to recover it. This could make the game more tactical, having you ensure your attacks connect instead of mashing the attack button until enemies come within range, and not relying on the most powerful attack in your arsenal at all times. Or in a fantasy setting, have a magic bar. Or even have both, so you have to mix up physical and magic attacks.
Blocking - I've seen games where your enemies block, but I don't recall any that have allowed the player to block (though there may have been some). This could be nicely tied with the energy bar idea above, so players would have to switch between blocking and attacking.
Add RPG elements - Castle Crashers already appears to be taking this approach (though this info is from Gamespots 2006 preview, and more recent previews on Gamespot don't mention it). Beat enemies and level up. This could lead to increased stats (such as taking less damage from enemies, dealing more damage, increased speed) to unlocking new combos or attacks. Being able to choose how you level up can increase replayability. Options could also include taking a pre-played character into even harder modes.
Online play - Even though I don't play often online, this should be a no-brainer for any new beat-em-up. The more players the better.
Level Editor - All the cool kids are doing it! This would be a great addition to any beat-em-up as an unlock after you have completed the game. Start messing around with your own levels. Edit players, enemies and weapons stats. Make levels stupidly hard, and share them with friends. Make levels filled with weapons. Throw every boss into a single room and see how long you can survive. While not everyone will be interested in using the level editor, it will certainly give longevity to those who do, and being able to download other peoples creations would be awesome for a new way to play the game.
Motion Controls - WiiWare and PSN have the advantage of some motion controls. I held the Wii remote and nunchuck in hand trying to think of ways to make it work, but nothing came to me. More intelligent people (that actually design games) can surely come up with something though that would be fun and fresh. Using the Sixaxis to shake off enemies that have grappled you would be a nice little addition. Even a dual stick brawler could be viable, with various combinations of flicks and semicircles on the right stick used to dish out attacks.

Are there any other ideas that could freshen up the gameplay in this genre? Or is it simply a genre that has been superceded by todays 3D action games? I'm not looking for 10 hour epics. I'm looking for games that will give me a couple of hours of solid beat-em-up action. That's surely worth my $10 that would be the price point on any of the downloadable services. It just seems dismal that in the 2 and a half years since the launch of the first of these services, where these smaller games are supposed to flourish, we haven't seen one original beat-em-up, the upcoming Castle Crashers notwithstanding.

I'll close out with a wishlist of what I'd like to see hit XBLA/PSN if they insist on rehashes. Of course, some of them are marred by licencing issues. All of these are arcade games (at least, the version I'd want to play):
Final Fight
Alien vs. Predator
X-Men - notable for having up to 6 players!
Dungeons & Dragons turns out there were two, I only knew about one. I'll take both!
Crime Fighters 2/Vendetta

Or, you know, maybe someone could give us something original.

...that I could be playing right now! Everyone is going to do their E3 blogs, so I figure I'd break it up and mention some games that are already released that I haven't got to yet, that I'm still pretty excited about playing. I might even finish a few of these before some of those E3 games make it to shelves... Perhaps there are some here that you have overlooked and will sate your appetite until those games arrive.

Bioshock - Xbox 360
I like first person shooters, and this seems like a good one. It sounds like a thinking man's shooter. I think this one has passed me by because sometimes when I wanted to play a first person shooter, I wanted something a bit more 'immediate' and that I should be in a certain sort of mood to enjoy Bioshock's story.

Mass Effect + Oblivion - Xbox 360 and/or PS3
I'm grouping these two together because they are RPG's. I like RPG's. I very rarely play RPG's. I keep putting them off because they take a lot of time to complete. I always figure I'll burn through a few shorter action games first, but that mindset keeps putting them off.

Burnout Paradise Xbox 360/PS3
I loved Burnout Revenge. I think the main reason I haven't played this is because of Forza 2. They are very different games, but I think I am done with Forza for the time being (60 out of the 90 events is enough for me), so the next time I feel the need to race, I think I will be playing this.

Metal Gear Solid 4 - PS3
I haven't played any other games in the series (or perhaps briefly on a friends console). From what I've heard, It may be daunting to try and figure out what is going with little back-knowledge, but I'm sure it won't affect my enjoyment of the game.

Unreal Tournament 3 - Xbox 360/PS3
It seems this series may have lost some relevancy, but I'm still keen to give a shot, even if I don't play online. But which version? The PS3 with user content? Or the 360 version so I can play split-screen? I think the latter is a more attractive option for me.

Uncharted - PS3
Another great looking game that I haven't had a chance to pop in the drive. I think this might be one of the ones that gets attention soon.

Ratchet & Clank - PS3
Another of the more simple games that will be a pleasure to play.

Super Paper Mario - Wii
It was always my intention to play this before Galaxy, but now that I've played Galaxy, I get the feeling this will be a mild step down. Still, it's been a while since I played Galaxy, and the gameplay is fairly different, so I'm sure I will still enjoy this title.

Metroid Prime 3 - Wii
Got halfway through Metroid Prime 1 before getting sidetracked. I don't know if I really want to go back, finish it, and play number 2 before going on to the newest instalment. I think I might just start here.

Zelda : Twilight Princess - Wii
Another game that I spent a few hours with at launch, then went to the shorter games on my list, expecting it to be long. I really should restart the game, as it was fun.

Marvel : Ultimate Alliance - Xbox 360/PS3
This might not have been a AAA title, but it's solid, and the gameplay is right up my alley. I had a good time playing the PS2 version at a friends house, so getting a beefier version should be an even better experience.

Zack & Wiki - Wii
I know this is on the 'good games that no one bought' list. And thus far, I'm a culprit. I hope to rectify that soon.

I punched that list out in about 10 minutes, and I could list at least another couple of dozen already released games for this generation that I would at least like to try because I think I will like them. I'm always amazed when people say there are no games to play (although I think this may often be 'there are no games I can afford or I think are worth the money, even if I will enjoy them to some extent). In all likelihood, some of the games that come out over the rest of the year will supercede some of these on the list.

Of course, having so many great games left to play means that nearly all of my gaming time is a great experience. I don't know that there is a better time to be a gamer.

I have finally completed my first review.

Resident Evil 4 : Wii Edition Review

Feel free to give it a thumbs up if you like. Constructive criticism not only welcome, but demanded :) Only way to get better is to know what doesn't seem right.

Maybe you have heard of Daft Bodies. This is the first video I saw of it:

Daft Bodies - Harder Better Faster Stronger

I have since looked up some of the female versions, but I think these guys nail it. For those that don't want to load the clip, a quick description. It is two guys who get down to their jocks and dance along to the song Harder Bester Faster Stronger by Daft Punk, with all the words used in the song written on their bodies, such that the words are presented to the camera when they are used in the song.

I recently went to a friends house, and loaded the clip to show him, and the following conversation took place.

Him : Why are we watching two guys?
Me : Cos it's awesome
Him : Why are we watching two guys strip?
Me : Cos the dance moves are awesome. There are chick versions, but these guys just nail it, it's the best version I've seen.
Him : If they take off any more clothes, I am out of here.

So what is homophobia? I don't quite get it, but it is built right into the definition of the word ; an irrational fear or loathing of homosexuals or homosexuality. But instances like these seem relatively common, where it seems that nothing is being expected of them in any homosexual manner, but is still somehow challenging to them.

There is a movie called Shortbus. I'm not quite sure how it didn't get banned here in South Australia given it's content. It contains actual sex, both heterosexual and homosexual, with details you would expect to find only in actual adult film (a quick explanation; in Australia, the highest general rating is R, hardcore adult films are rated X, and only sold out of two states). It has been a while since I have seen it, but I thought it was an interesting and honest look into sexuality. Nevertheless, I can bet the majority would be scrambling for the remote the moment two naked gentlemen get close to each other (or just get naked, for that matter). I didn't see a need to do so. The way they act in these scenes is incremental to learning about them.

There are other things that simply seem taboo for a heterosexual male. I doubt very much I could ask any of my male friends for a massage, and would probably think I had some ulterior sexual motive. I've had a massage from a qualified male masseur, and I didn't leave thinking about how I would like to bend over the next guy I saw. He touches guys all day, and he had a 'traditional' family. I reckon a couple of my friends might even be challenged if I asked them to cut my hair (I'm lazy and use clippers, but need someone else to do the last bit of tidying). Try giving most guys a hug and they will fall over backwards trying to get away from your embrace.

Most heterosexual men probably fail to recognise whether another man is hot or sexy. I'd say I have trouble in that department, but that is simply because I don't find men attractive. But I would acknowledge that Brad Pitt and Matthew McConaughy (too lazy to look up spelling) are good looking guys. A person I used to work with did some dancing (as work) on the side at night clubs. Boy, did he have some moves. You know what, I'll come right and say it; his moves were damn sexy. Not in the sexual arouse sense, but in that sleek, fast, complete control of his body sense. But I have no doubt if I had turned to a guy beside me and said that, they would instantly label me as gay.

What I am trying to get at here is that there seems to be some cultural confusion (for want of a better term) between what actually makes you homosexual (sexually attracted to other men) and things that have no bearing on it. I'm aware that I have only covered one angle here, because it is all I can relate to. Are there any such taboos between heterosexual women? Would any of the above challenge your heterosexuality (if you are heterosexual)? Why do you think some of these arbitrary barriers are in place?