I've been working on a novel of mine for a while now and I feel it's time I started showing some of it to people. While it is far from finished, I just want to get a little knowledge of people's reactions towards it. Just so your not completely lost, the book revolves around a man named Khellandros, having recently been broken out of incarceration, is now on the run from the Empire's (I realize just saying Empire sounds clichéd, but there will be a lot more detail into that later...) elite soldiers, the Black Guard. With his only companion Gwyneth, Khellandros winds up in the territory of the oppressed and seclusive draconians. Soon, they garner the aid of the creatures the Empire has made to look like mindless, bloodthirsty brutes, but in reality just want to take their place in the world. As they journey to get the people of the world to see the truth, Khellandros is reunited with his old companion and lover, Thylanas, who escaped the cold clutches of Death itself. He also, against his will, discovers a mental link between him and the man apparently controlling the Empire, Ald'ruhn Ebonheart. (Yes, Ald'ruhn is a tribute to Morrowind, Ebonheart just coincidently happens to be another town in it as well...you should be able to discern its real meaning.) Eventually, Khellandrostries to garner support from the peoples and creatures of the world to bring down a deceptive evil manipulating the governing forces and slowly dragging the world into darkness. So, anyway, here it is:A large battle is about to begin in the underground city of Parnassus, with Khellandros leading the defense. (Kang is the leader of the draconians. Nenevë, Navária, Aucthus, and Hâvith are draconians as well, just so you aren't confused.) Enjoy!
When I entered the next cavern, I dropped the torch and gasped.
"My God..."
An immense, vast cathedral stood at the back wall of the cavern. And, if not for the numerous people walking the streets, I would have sworn I was hallucinating. As well, there were many houses and open courtyards, full of curbside marketstands, currently in use with typical city hustle and bustle.
I quickly ran back to the others, leaping over stones and dodging stalactites along the way.
"Come...now! You will not believe this! Let's go!" I yelled, nearly tripping over someone's pack.
"What the --" Aucthus started.
"Are you okay?" Asked Thylanas, surprised by my enthusiasm.
"Just come...everyone!"
We ran back to the city. As everyone caught their breath, they individually looked up and nearly lost it again. It was nothing short of a breathtaking sight. Around the encompassment of the cavern, great, jagged, and bright clusters of crystals gave the room a green-blue glow to it. Behind the cathedral, bright, white lights rose up as if calling to the heavens, apparently caused by more strange crystal formations.
The descent to the city was a slow one due to the nearly vertical slope. When we reached the bottom, people crowded around us. This was shocking, because no one saw us come down, or apparently, so I thought. They didn't say anything, but looked as if waiting for something. I saw a lone figure approach on the main street.
"What do you want with our...community?" He rasped, ripe with age.
He looked like a man most likely in his eighties; he was dressed in bishop's robes.
"Well, really we came here on accident. I'm sorry if that was problematic..."
No one was listening; they were all staring up behind me. I turned around and saw a very horrifying sight...
...Thousands upon thousands of strange, bug-like creatures poured in through every crevice they could find. Women screamed, children ran to their mothers, men gripped their families, it was terrible to behold. Soldiers flooded in in preparation of the battle.
"It's the lonaikais, and the kouti!!" a woman screeched in horror.
"Bishop, if we--"
"You brought them here! You awakened them, outsiders! We may all die now!" the bishop growled.
Families hugged and reassured each other. While men donned armor and grabbed weapons, women and children retreated into the cathedral.
There were so many of the creatures, the outcome looked hopeless. The lonaikais, which I guessed were the long, sinuous centipede-like creatures. The acid dripping from their jaws burned holes through the ground. The kouti, then, were the bluish, spiked beetle-like creatures. They thrust their pincers into the ground repeatedly, eager for bloodshed.
"Blessed Nozodin...watch over us." I whispered under my breath.
"That's it!" I drew my zweihander from my back and shouted, "Would you let them tear us apart and destroy all you love and know?" I asked rhetorically, "No, Then get into action! Now!"
The soldiers then grasped the full reality of the situation. They moved into formation. Faster than I thought possible, and with grim determination. True soldiers, ready to die for kin and country.
"Front battalion! Shields up, spears out! Archer and crossbower battalions notch arrows!"
The army of insect creatures screeched and charged.
"Fire!" I screamed. A sum of arrows bounced off the creatures' carapaces, but still many got arrows to the face, which were meant to be beneath their shells and were unprotected, their lives ended quickly. A sudden barrage of spikes flew out of the ground, impaling many bugs.
I looked back and saw Thylanas smiling, encased by dark energy.
As well, giant boulders fell from the ceiling, crushing clusters of the horrors. But still they were unimpeded; lonaikai and kouti alike flung themselves at the soldiers. Countless numbers were impaled upon the spears.
Wave after wave of arrows and bolts sailed into the army. Soon, the spear battalions were overrun by the bugs. I heard the screams of many as the saliva of the insects burned them alive.
"Damn, bad odds..." I muttered. "Swords! Out front!"
A charge of sword and halberd infantry clashed with the horde of snapping jaws and clacking pincers.
"You can handle yourself, right?" I asked Thylanas.
"Why do you still ask..."
"...Right." I said. "Kang! Let's go, bring everyone!"
I charged straight into the front lines and did a coup de grace down on an lonaikai's skull. I was soon joined by Kang, Aucthus, Hâvith, Nenevë, and Navária.
It was an endless onslaught. More, more, and even more of the things appeared. As more of our soldiers fell before the creatures, I became ready to order a retreat. And when a man next to me got a spike through his face, I did.
"Thylanas! Cover our retreat!" I yelled.
Our army ran back towards the cathedral. I looked back at the enemy army and an endless amount of things were happening to them. Some exploded, some caved in on themselves, some just disappeared, some fell apart, some imploded, some just dropped dead, others began to attack each other.
"It's beautiful, isn't it. Great collage, I think." Thylanas whispered in my ear.
"Looks great." I said dryly, "Let's get inside." I said. "Bar the door!"
A group of men, with much effort, dropped a heavy wooden bar on the door.
After about fifteen minutes, the ear-piercing screech could be heard again and, in seconds, they were outside the door.
"Ready!"
"Where are the women and children?" I pulled an officer aside.
"In the catacombs, sir." he responded.
"Good, get prepared." I surveyed the room, if they got in, there would be nothing but ourselves to impede them.
"My Gods! They're climbing over the walls and roof!" a soldier shouted.
It was true. Claws scraped against the cold stone. I sat down and tried to think.. All these men were no warriors, you could see it in their faces. But still they fought to defend their families in hope of sparing them this horrible fate. These people were not here because they wanted to, they were in hiding, living in fear. Despite their state, the soldiers held on with grim determination.
"Barricade it. Quickly, with whatever you can move!"
Everyone began to move pews, tables, chairs, statues...whatever would block the door.
I walked over to Thylanas.
"You know, we're here for a reason." she stated shrewdly.
"Not...the rain. I know who did it." I realized.
"He's drawing us to him, then. Right?" she inquired.
"You know who it is?" I was certainly surprised.
"Not really. But I can definitely feel him watching us, toying with us."
Just then, Kang walked over.
"This may be...no, this is the worst situation I've ever been in..." he grumbled as he drew his axe.
"Sir, we seem to have lost maybe a couple hundred men or so, maybe more..." Aucthus reported, Hâvith close behind. "And we seem to be left with relatively three hundred."
"Okay, let's try and make it through." I said.
Suddenly, the enemy began bashing against the door. Men ran over to help further reinforce it.
"Here we go." said Hâvith gruffly.
Everyone readied their weapons, this was the last stand. If we failed, everyone died.
"Thylanas," I whispered to her. "this may be tried and true, but we may not make it out of here. This is exactly what he wanted, and we fell right into it. I haven't said this before, though I'm sure you know. And whatever may happen here and beyond, just know, I love you."
There they were, the words I feared I may never get to say. In moments like this, one can say things they may not say anywhere else, no matter how much they mean to. I meant this with all possible feeling.
I saw tears form in her eyes, but she just stared ahead. Then, all of a sudden, she kissed me. After the shock wore off, I held her close. It was not until the banging on the door resumed that we let go of each other.
"'Bout time you guys did that." Gwyneth said almost incoherently.
This time the smashing against the door grew louder, gradually, but louder. The door began to crack.
"Weapons up!" I ordered.
Steel flashed and bowstrings drew back. These men were ready to fight to the death.
Thud, thud, thud, THUD. The wood began to weaken. Claws began to flash through the doors.
Suddenly, the door splintered apart in a hail of wood and metal, and monsters began to pour in. They were led by a giant, a thing made of razor-sharp claws and jagged teeth. Soldiers ran to destroy the fiends. Blade met claw, lance met carapace, fang met flesh and sinew.
"Bows, let fly!" I commanded.
A close-knit wall of arrows and bolts slaughtered the bugs. The giant was a massive problem though, soldiers were butchered by the dozens by its swinging arms.
"Thylanas, bind it! Kang, to me!"
Shadows crawled down the walls, across the floor, and onto the creature. It was bound tightly by this dark magic. Hence it was forced down to the floor and its arms were held in thrall. Kang ran by me, jumped off the wall, and landed on the thing's back. It struggled to get at him, but was unsuccessful. I ran towards it and began to hack off arms. Black ichor poured out of the stumps. I began to beat at the abdomen, which was covered by a thick shell. Kang hacked at the even thicker shell on its skull. Finally I cracked through the shell and impaled it to the floor, but still it refused to die. Little did I see the arm come behind me and gash four long, bloody lines down my back. As it reached back for another strike, it suddenly exploded. Thylanas ran over.
"Turn over!" she said anxiously.
Vertigo struck me as I lost more and more blood.
"C'mon, c'mon. Damnit, I'm trying, but healing isn't my specialty." she said, very annoyed.
"Move! I can heal him." I heard Gwyneth say. Then I felt great heat and a sizzling sensation. I felt the wounds close and full consciousness return.
I rose just in time to see Kang bend over and split the creatures head in two. He turned and ran back to the battle.
I waited a moment for the vertigo to wear off.
"Push them back!"
"For the Bishop!"
Numerous cheers and taunts escaped the mouths of the defenders as we pushed the enemy back into the doorway. I even let a smile fly as I decapitated an lonaikai. Unexpectedly, the dead of the enemy suddenly rose back up, mutilated as some of them were. The soldiers had frozen looks of terror on their faces, but the undead insects just ignored them and charged straight towards the living bugs.
"It's a new trick." Thylanas said. "Took some time to master."
Unbelievably, the enemy started to retreat. Those not fast enough were trampled into bloody pulps by the hundreds of legs.
"No! Stay here!" I ordered as some soldiers began to charge after the fiends. I only wish they had listened, for they were not retreating, but sending in the second wave.
These were monstrous, horned creatures with mammoth maws filled with row after row of teeth. Those who weren't lucky enough to be trampled were ripped apart as the creatures fought over their kill.
"Back into the cathedral. Hurry!"
Any remaining living souls made a mad dash back to the old stone building. Suddenly, a soldier next to me just turned inside out. I looked back and surrounding the enclosure of the cave, were Harthreziem. Resembling vampires, but they flew on wings of black death. They relied on death and blood magic to torture their foe.
"Damn, everyone, hide! It's the Harthreziem!"
Many a man dove to the floor, cowering in terror at the mention of the dreaded order. The enemy grabbed a major foothold with our retreat, but I had no ideas left. Kang ran over to me, narrowly missing a barrage of spikes thrown from some unrecognizable creature.
"What now? We have to get them back or we're done."
"Thylanas, you got anything for this situation..." My voice was nearly drowned out by the noise.
"Maybe, I don't know if it will work though."
"Well, try it! Aucthus, take a group of soldiers out there and guard her!"
"I'll go with him." Kang said.
"Fine, I'll get ready in case this fails!"
Aucthus, Kang, and a battalion of soldiers fought off the horrors in a semi-circle, whilst Thylanas prepared her spell. Gradually, a blinding light grew from Thylanas. Everyone had to look away, lest they be blinded.
"Kang, get everyone back! Now!" I screamed as a great wind formed, nearly blowing me off my feet.
Kang and the others dove through the doorway and crawled back.
Suddenly, all noise stopped, nothing moved. It seemed as though time had frozen. In a sense of vertigo, time returned to normal. And as it did, a magnificent wave of burning fire swept through the enemy. Anything caught in it was virtually eradicated. They just vaporized. Rocks were torn up and buildings collapsed, but the bugs and the creatures and the Harthreziem were left to dust.
I saw the pain on Thylanas's face and I saw her fall when the last shockwave of fire ended. I ran to catch her.
"How the hell did you that?"
"Practice... Don't worry...I'm...fine...I just need some...rest." she slipped into unconsciousness, and though her skin was seared pretty badly, she looked happy.
I stood back up and looked at the cavern. There was only destruction, but no corpses. Everything but stone and metal and been eradicated.
"Wow, that's one damn powerful lady." said an officer who came up to look at the devastation, leaning against a wall in exhaustion.
"Mm...sure is." I whispered to myself.
In the back, near the altar, the trap door was pulled back and women and children flooded to their husbands and fathers. I leaned against the archway and watched families reunite and others discover the fate of their loved ones.
"Now...why are you here?" the bishop asked me.
"We were camping in the entrance to the cave and I happened to come across this cavern."
"Then, if that is true. You were led here, and leading that army as well. Someone wants us dead, and I can guess who."
"I think I do to, but I do not who he is."
"His name is..." but he was drowned out by an even greater force. As it intruded into my skull, I keeled over in pain. My name is Ald'ruhn Ebonheart and I rule this world now. I must thank you for leading me to those damned rebels. I was having trouble finding them. Come, meet me at Kad'Trà gen. We shall settle this in my domain.
I will. Be ready for me.
Oh, I already am. You should be worried about yourself. Then, his presence abruptly vanished.
© 2007
Log in to comment