Ubi Suits: We've got a problem. Nobody likes AC anymore.

Ubi Devs: Well, you've been forcing us to crank out a new one every year for, like, forever.

Ubi Suits: We've decided to fix the problem by remastering the best games in the series. Everybody loved AC II, right?

Ubi Devs: Yeah, that one was great. We actually had two years to work on it.

Ubi Suits: But, make sure you totally botch the new version.

Ubi Devs: Wait, what?

Ubi Suits: Yeah, that way, the other games will look way better in comparison. Genius!

That's all well and good, but what about robot orgies? HBO has taught me to expect that from the Wild West.

Can't imagine it being more than $500, but best guess is $400, then maybe more for deluxe/elite editions with larger HD and included elite controller.

5 movies? Milk, milk...

The old megazord was a Voltron wannabe. The new one is a Michael Bay Transformer. Honestly not sure whether that's a step up or down.

"I was so bummed when I couldn't run Linux in the living room on my PS3!" said nobody ever who wasn't being paid to.

Nintvidia Schwield! P S PWii!

Oh, thank Glob.

As for what happened, obviously everybody who made the mistake of watching the first one quickly realized how horrible it was and didn't come back for the second. Fool me once, shame on Michael Bay. Fool me twice and you can't get fooled again!

A 3DS costs $200. Is that price dropping, or will the Switch be priced much higher to create separation? How many people are going to want to own both?

I don't really see the "new experience" they're bragging about. We've seen the Nvidia Shield already. We've seen tablets already. We've seen the PSP/Vita already. Switch offers nothing apparently new. It will either be a mobile device with a docking station that makes it a half-assed home console, or it will be a home console whose bulk and/or battery life will make it a half-assed mobile device. Either way, it may not be enough to reverse Nintendo's trend of almost every home console generation falling short of its predecessor (Wii being the one notable exception).

What, no sprained deltoids?