I never wanted Paris Hilton to be relevant, in any way. Celebrity comes from many avenues, mostly when someone has talent in the arts, and effective promotion.  Then there's also celebrities through politics, reality shows, and (gasp!) heroism. But Paris has none of that. She's just got money and handlers. But now, sadly, she's become relevant.

Paris was to spend 40 plus days in Jail. Not from a DUI, but for violating her probation two times. The DUI just got the ball rolling. Then she had the sentence cut down to 23 days. Now she's at her Mansion (at least tonight).

Why do I care? I don't care about Paris. I care about how government works, and the importance of the justice arm in this separation of powers. At her sentencing, the judge was specific. Hard time (for her). No work release programs, and other provisions. The stickler: No Ankle Bracelet! So tonight's she's at her home, maybe having friends over. Why? Because the sheriff supposedly has jurisdiction over who he releases from the jail. But, uhmm, the judge said no ankle bracelets. There's particulars here, like who has jurisdiction, and what might supersede what.

That's why Paris is relevant. And I'm so sorry! :)

TG

I've always loved magic. Illusions, slight of hand, spectacles, love to see them. Many people outgrow the novelty of it, like Santa Claus or pro wrestling. Fact is, they're all real! Because even if something is fake, the experience is real! Don't get me wrong, I would never, ever, say Santa Claus is fake! :)

Last fall I came across this show on the A&E network, called Criss Angel: Mindfreak. He's a "magician." Every magician has a schtick. Angel's is kind of Goth. And I'm not a big Goth fan. But he does some great tricks! He's kind of moved away from the Goth thing. He's going more mainstream. He wants to kick David Blaine's ass! (that's another, better known magician). Anyhow, Mindfreak's third season debuted tonight, and it was okay. Every episode, he has a big trick he's going to do, and he does little tricks leading up to the big one. Rather than talk about it, I checked out some youtube.com entries, and thought I would share them. Now, watching youtube is not as good as watching it on tv, but here's a few examples:

There's different kinds of magic. One of the most appealing is the illusion. Making someone disappear is standard fare. Here's an example of how Angel makes someone disappear:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=VRR30Tll6wY

I had to include this one. He climbs through a plate glass window! It's a couple of minutes long, but worth the payoff!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=ruorW4P3Uw8

Another great illusion is the girl cut in half. This one's kind of creepy, but fun to watch:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=r3m9AcWYDUw

Another form of magic is slight of hand. It's the purest form of magic. No special effects, just the hands and the eyes! This one shows the art of misdirection. Sometimes he shows how he does his stuff!:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=m9LvsBZ6oU4

Yet another form of magic is mentalism. Like the magician can read your mind, better than you can! Here Angel is with a guy that hosts American Justice and Cold Case Files, kind of a celebrity. It's elaborate, but it blows the subject's mind!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=d3ZOxGrU94w

And finally, there's the spectacle. This is when Angel has his big moment. Sometimes it's a feat of endurance, sometimes it's mind boggling, almost superhero stunts. He loves levitation. Here's an example:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=uOCbXpRiw8k

Of course all the tricks have a secret! I mean, that last one, there MUST have been a helicopter carrying him! :) And he's done better stuff, I just couldn't find the youtube videos to show them. If you want to see more, do a youtube search: Criss Angel! Perhaps many of you are familiar with Criss, he's breaking into the mainstream right now. Would love to see him make a guest appearance on House! Don't you know the Good Doctor would have a special dislike for magicians?!! :)

TG

 

 

 

I'm doing a blog just to replace my old blog! It's dated! I'm watching Hellboy the Movie right now, a great movie! If you haven't seen it, go out to your theaters now! No wait, a little late for that. Catch it on FX or DVD. But I digress... This blog is about the House Off Season. And yes, battling the dreaded HGD (House Gap Disease*). I've come up with a three step treatment approach:

First, I'm going to get the past season's dvd's. I know there's episodes I've missed. And just going back through the the old episodes, it will help me with my Houseology. Plus, you know, just to get a steady fix!

Second, diversions. Looking forward to a vacation in the Southwest, I lived in New Mexico for a few years. Miss those mountains and wide open spaces! Besides that, I plan to go to more movies at the theater. Might take up golf again. Or bowling! I love bowling! Wonder which one House would prefer. Hugh? Ahhhh! HGD setting in already! :)

Third, keep up with my House buds. The Off Season is when some freaky threads can get started! And everybody's blogs, love reading those. That's it! If you've got some other suggestions, would love to hear them! Together, we're gonna House It Out!

*House Gap Disease, copyright Emily, M.D.

TG

I hate it when I have a Houseless Tuesday. But yesterday, I had so many House-like things happen, it kind of made up for it. I work at a newspaper, so true House-like things aren't that common! First off...

Last Friday, I noticed a coworker of mine had a real swollen face. He said he had gone to the doctor about it, and he was having some kind of serious allergic reaction. He put him on three different meds, antibiotics I think. He said it may take weeks before they take effect. Then yesterday I come in to work, and his face is covered in splotches! And swollen! And he's talking kinda slow. He said the doc told him that one of the meds had caused the reaction. Now he was in the process: take him off all the meds, wait till the splotches go away, then put him on the meds one at a time, to see which one was causing it! After that, they'll deal with the swelling. So very House-like! He's got it rough right now.

Then another coworker, a pressman who works in the back, came up front with a big cut on his thumb. He needed a band-aid. As he's putting the band-aid on, BOOM! Passed out. He's out about ten seconds till we shake him up, and he says he's... alright. Must have been seeing the blood, or kneeling down to get the band-aid then coming back up, whatever, that passed him out. So he goes to the back. A little while later someone goes to check on him, and he's sprawled out on the floor! Out again! They shake him up, and he says he's fine. Would not go to the doctor! Some people... For the rest of the day, whenever I saw him I yelled "Paging Doctor House!"

And finally, this was like a Clinic Patient. Sort of. This really old lady comes through the door. She announces that she has some really big news that MUST go in the newspaper. The news? She's having hip replacement surgery this weekend, and she has to tell all her friends! There's no way she can call them ALL, and the newspaper is the only way to tell them! It's NEWS! It was really sweet. My boss had to explain to her that it wasn't exactly news. Then she said she would pay for it! But he just couldn't take her money. I got to thinking about it later, and in a way, it really is news! How many people have to think it's important to make it news? Kind of like this blog! Okay, that was my Houseless, but rather House-like, day.

I just got my AIM software working. That's the instant messaging software from AOL. Some of you might use it! It inspired me to tell a bit about the websites I like to go to. First off, my AIM screen name is tuckgraph1. I'm still learning all the stuff with AIM, but if you want to say hey, Hey! :)

Another site I like to go to is pokerroom.com. It's for... playing poker! I don't play for money, but it's so much fun losing my play money! I'm on there as either tuckgraph or graphtuck. Yes, a dexlecsic poker player! It's really a lot of fun. If you're playing for free. Come take my money! All In!

Other than that, I like to go to websites with a liberal political slant, like:

thinkprogress.org

huffingtonpost.com

salon.com

crooksandliars.com

I'm not a rabid political person, just concerned about my country, looking for answers. And my best friend is a staunch conservative, so I don't hold any grudges. Friendships are so much more important than any of that nonsense. Anyway, see you in (God I hate to say this) Cyberspace!

TG

My older bro invited me for dinner tonight. The wife was working late, and we'd share some leftovers. I knew a House rerun was coming on Fox, but figured we'd eat way before that. No. So we ate spaghetti while watching House. You never know what you're going to get! Fortunately there was no digestive track or brain surgery. But there were a couple of moments where I put my fork down, got through the errrr factor, then paused before I started shoveling again. At least it wasn't lasagna! Really, does anybody eat dinner while watching House? :)

TG

I call it quick, because there's so much more I'd like to say. Mom and Dad were high school sweethearts. They raised five kids, and did a damn fine job. Dad was the "breadwinner," while mom took care of the domestic front. Mom didn't drive. She had been in a car accident when she was young. It didn't hurt her physically, but emotionally. She had no problem with riding around in a car, but just couldn't drive.

So she spent her life mostly at the house, making it a home. The big meals, the laundry, cleaning house, all the things kids can take for granted growing up. She was like the UberMom! I know everyone doesn't have what they feel are the best parents. But mom, she put you on this journey. And to all the moms out there, I know it's a tough job. We appreciate it. At least I do.

A friend of mine sent me this, it's a story. It shows pictures and text, with a voice over. Not sure if you need a special plug-in, but it worked for me. WARNING: this thing is almost seven minutes long, so if you don't want to fool with it, that's understandable. My question is, is it Sappy? What does Sappy mean? lol. I know it when I see it, but I'm still not sure if it is. Here's the link:

 

http://www.teachermovie.com/

 

Let me know if it's Sappy!

 

TG

This story goes back to... Christmas, I guess. My sister-in-law was sweet enough to prepare everyone stockings, and they were full of the typical assorted fruits and candies. I didn't dig around through it too much, I put it in my closet and completely forgot about it. Until this weekend. Needless to say, those apples and oranges were nasty! And no, I didn't try to eat them.

But the candy, that's another story. Amongst the goodies was a box of Bazooka Joe Bubblegum! For those of you not familiar with Bazooka Joe Bubblegum (is there anyone?), They're famous for their wrappers, which have a Bazooka Joe Comic Strip on them. And I swear, the text on these comic strips have become so small, I can't read them anymore! Why does she give this stuff to a 44 year old man anyhow? For my birthday, she gave me deodorant, but that's yet another story.

Well, it had been so long since I had read Bazooka Joe comics, I was frustrated. So much so that I went out and bought a lighted Bausch & Lomb magnifying glass. And I'll tell ya, those comic strips are SO CORNY! Certainly not worth a twelve dollar magnifying glass. Then, at the bottom of the comic strip, I notice I have a fortune. My fortune? "Don't Take Any Wooden Nickles- You Could Get A Splinter!" Oh, hardee har-har. That's not even a fortune, it's advice! So lame. But the bubblegum's pretty good. Wait, it's not over yet. I read in small print that, if I collect fifteen Bazooka Joe Comic Strips, I can, for $8.99, get a Bazooka Joe T-Shirt! Even better, one size fits all! I can't explain why I want this, but it's gonna happen. And it says, "for more details,www.bazookajoe.com." That's it, I'm a goner. I go to bazooka joe's place, and it immediately loads this hip-hop song about bazooka joe bubblegum, sung by some group called Tha' Heights. It starts out,

My Mom
She Gave Me A Dollar
She Told Me To Buy A Collar
But I Didn't Buy No Collar
Instead I Bought Some Bubblegum!
Bazooka Zooka Bubblegum!

Then they repeat with other forms of currency, such as a dime (he's supposed to buy a lime) and a nickel (pickle, natch). Once the song's finally over, it starts again! AAARrrrgh! Just before I decide to get the heck out of there, I notice an option to "Watch Videos." As it turns out, they're having some kind of contest where people can send in videos of themselves singing this nerve wracking song. You can watch and rate the videos. And it's so stupid, it's funny. If you have absolutely nothing else to do with your life, go check some out. Some people just love to make fools of themselves. And if you see a video of an old man singing the song while waving a stocking over his head, IT'S NOT ME! But give it a good rating, okay? :)

FedEX delivered a lot more than a space bar today! It's a sleek, shiny new set of keys, providing crisp, responsive keystrokes. It's even got volume control buttons, extended FKeys, and a cupholder!! :) Okay, that last one not really, but what a great idea! Ironically, it almost cost less than the shipping! Most impressive, there's not a cat hair on it! Yet. Which reminds me...

When I said I spilled a diet pepsi on my old keyboard, I took full responsibility, because I'm not a cat. Miss Prissy (whom I've nicknamed "clumsy cat") really did it. It was early Sunday morning, which, I believe, the Lord gave us to sleep late. As I was innocently sleeping, MP leaps from the bed to the desk, landing with a big "ReaAAaarh!" That's what she does. She doesn't meow. She thinks she's a lioness, I guess. Anyways, she was making her way to my Executive Desk Chair (which she's nicknamed "My Spot"), and knocked over the glass tumbler containing the sticky liquid. So it wakes me up, I see there's the keyboard flood, and MP going "Merrrrr...," meaning "What happened? What are you going to do about this?". I didn't appreciate that at all! I'm calling around. There may be a lawsuit pending.

In the interim, I've thought about a lot of things I'd like to blog about. Then I think, nah, not a lot to say about it, not worth the effort. I'm considering doing a rambling blog, kind of a stream of conciousness format. Don't know yet, but it's great to be back! My fingertips fit these keys quite well.

TG